| lesley153
|
My mother was one of three, and theirs are the cousins I've written about here. We used to be closer. My father had two big sisters, both of whom married men from abroad, and stayed abroad.
One of them married an Israeli man, who was at one time in the government, and David Ben-Gurion said of him "Either he goes or I go." They had a son, and he's stayed there.
The other sister married an American man. They went to the Bronx first, and then New Jersey. They had four daughters, three of whom are still in America; scattered but still there. The other one has been living in England for about 30 years, and in Birmingham with her English husband for the 25 years since they got married. I haven't spoken to her for eight years (long story!) but she has retained her American nationality. I spotted her on the internet, before the most recent US Presidential election, asking how she could vote in it. |
Reply #2161. Dec 20 10, 8:24 AM
|
Jazmee27 
|
I, too, am an only child and, while mom only had one brother, the same cannot be said of my grandma (two sisters and three brothers). [So many cousins, I lost count!]
Only half the family talks (my Grandma's, not Mom's-which is to say her Father's side].
Reply #2162. Dec 20 10, 1:01 PM
|
bionic4ever
|
I'm an only child, and each of my parents only has one sibling. I've remained in touch with my mother's side of the family through the years, but even before my dad passed away, I'd completely lost touch with his sister (my aunt) to the point that when I saw her at my dad's wedding, I didn't even recognize her! (Yes, that's rather sad.) Have managed to get in touch with her occasionally via e-mail in the last few years, but it just isn't the same.
Reply #2163. Dec 21 10, 8:36 AM
|
garrysouders
|
My Father had seven sisters, two of whom are still around, They had 30 something children among themselves, many of the 30 are grand parents. Prolific bunch. Most of these cousins live within two miles of me. When we have family get togethers, it has to be a big place. Such a large group means, crazies, smarties, cuties and sweeties. Some you want to hug and some avoid. Thanks for bringing up the subject, many pleasant memories were brought to mind.
Reply #2164. Dec 21 10, 10:27 AM
|
| lesley153
|
I haven't got any aunts left, I've just got an uncle by marriage, but I never liked him that much and thought his behaviour around the time my aunt died was just appalling, so I have nothing to do with him. I see him occasionally at family celebrations, and he says don't be a stranger, and then I don't see him till the next one.
There's a second cousin who went to Israel and didn't keep in touch, and his big sister is still in London, but we don't have any contact with her now. A couple of years ago, she rang my sister-in-law for a bit of a grumble, and had been banging on for a while when she discovered that she wasn't talking to my SIL, but to her youngest son. She was furious. Why hadn't he told her he wasn't his mother? Um - perhaps because she hadn't asked? she just assumed it was her and talked so he couldn't get a word in?
No, it was his fault. She rang my brother to complain about his son's behaviour, and my brother asked why she hadn't checked who she was talking to. End of cordial relations.
And I haven't had a peep out of my in-laws (husband's family) for longer than I can remember.
Recently, my cousin said he was just finding out how many lies his father told about him, and he told me a few things his father said about me, and they were all lies too. I am now treating a lot of things my uncle told me as very dubious indeed. The pinch of salt just gets bigger and bigger.
Aren't family politics fun?
|
Reply #2165. Dec 21 10, 10:31 AM
|
| lesley153
|
| Garry, that sounds wonderful - much more like what Happy Families should be. |
Reply #2166. Dec 21 10, 10:33 AM
|
Jazmee27
|
I second that :)
Reply #2167. Dec 21 10, 2:40 PM
|
| lesley153
|
There's still quite a lot of snow about, but the temperature's around freezing, or maybe a degree above, so the header tank in the loft has thawed, and the tap in the laundry room is now running freely again.
Unfortunately so is a mad or rogue or broken pipe just beneath the laundry room sink, and it's running freely all over the floor. There's a stopcock under the sink, and a main stopcock under the kitchen sink, so stiff I can't turn either of them. I've even hit them with a big screwdriver, but they won't budge.
Jonathan thought there might be asbestos in his flat, presumably the whole block, and reported it. An asbestos expert-type person came to talk to him, and he's now assured me that there's nothing to worry about. He is now packed and out and on his way here. Maybe he'll have more luck with the stopcocks! |
Reply #2168. Dec 22 10, 9:31 AM
|
bionic4ever
|
About a month ago, my mom told me that she'd spoken to my aunt on my dad's side - and that she'd asked about me. Mom suggested I send my aunt an e-mail, so I did. Have not heard back from her. Really rather sad to have a whole set of relatives out there who are virtually strangers to me...
Reply #2169. Dec 22 10, 12:08 PM
|
| lesley153
|
My aunt's two sons have been almost incommunicado for a long time. The younger one is single, footloose and all the rest, and hardly anyone hears from him. It's been like that for years. The older one is firmly planted in a house with a wife and four children. When my other cousin dies, his father's flat, which should have gone to him, will go to the two brothers. Nice. He hasn't responded to any of my emails for a year or more, so I haven't bothered to tell him my new email.
A few weeks ago, the older one rang my brother to ask if I'd received an invitation he'd sent for some family celebration. No, I haven't, not in the post or by email, and why is he ringing my brother and not me?
So I emailed him - I have two email addresses for him and wrote to both - and said here is my new email. I haven't heard from him. If I ever had a second's thought about feeling guilty for not having given him my new address earlier, it died before it registered. Either he's not answering me, or he hasn't told me his new email address(es). I'm not really that bothered.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jonathan got here a couple of hours ago. When they were queuing for brains, I must have been in the loo, because they saved my share for my son. He's definitely got a double ration.
The first thing he did was to examine the leak. "There's no way you could have known this," he told me, "but it's not a burst pipe: a hose from the washing machine has become unthreaded, and popped off."
He found a spare hose and the water has stopped running. I'm keeping him. :D |
Reply #2170. Dec 22 10, 12:53 PM
|
honeybee4
|
I think there are more familys than you know that have familys that don't speak. My husband's older brother lived with his grandmother and the rest of the family didn't have much to do with him. All of the time that I have been married,I have never asked my husband about it but from time to time, and little by little, he has given my the idea that the brother of my father-in-law is really the father of this brother. Though he doesn't come around very much, he is always friendly and he will talk to me for hours.
Reply #2171. Dec 22 10, 1:39 PM
|
satguru
|
I've got both friends and clients with big families all they ever do is moan about. Of course you can't pick and choose and pretty hard to avoid most of them either way, but I'm now down to my parents and that's it, and always tell them if I had more at least I'd have a decent chance I'd always get on with some of them- I always did with the rest of the family who are no longer with us and never had a single one I fell out with, but appear to be something of an exception besides the huge family I grew up with who have four children and many cousins who all look after each other and the three oldest siblings now live in the same road just like the old days while the four children all live in the same small town they moved to once one went there first. So I say the same to everyone, stick with the good ones and see the rest as the price you have to pay and try and keep out of their way. I do admittedly have a cousin (I have no first cousins so I have to borrow my parents' who have enough to share around) who withheld a great deal of money from us so although I still speak to him will never trust him again. I was very close to his brother but he died around his 50s of a brain tumour. I have a favourite cousin but sadly he's American and see every 5 years or so at best. Maybe that's why we get on?
Reply #2172. Dec 22 10, 7:36 PM
|
| veronikkamarrz
|
:)OK Lesley, when was the last time you used the washer? ;)
I too, am an 'only child.' All my blood relatives live in Alaska, except my children who live close to me. One of my many cousins does not speak to me, due to a misunderstanding when I was there in 2007...I still try, but no longer really concerned. You do what you can.
Reply #2173. Dec 22 10, 8:08 PM
|
| lesley153
|
Families must be more fun than everything else out together. A lot of families seem to have at least one member who doesn't want his or her other half talking to other people. "What do you need other people for? You got me!" Miserable.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
" Lesley, when was the last time you used the washer? ;) "
Aaaah - that would be telling!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Before I picked Jonathan up from the station yesterday, I had to revive the car, which hadn't moved for about ten days and has just been sitting there looking like a long igloo. Brushed the snow off the driver's door, got the door open, put key in ignition (eyes closed tight), held breath - and it started first time.
I left the engine running, and the heater and the back window heater on and attacked the snow with a large broom. As I was brushing snow off, I heard a whistle. It was Merv. He repeated his offer to get shopping for me, which was nice, but I declined. I left the car heating up while I went it to get my feet warm.
When I went out again, it was just in time to see Merv walking back with a little bag of shopping. He stopped and showed me a black and white picture of a young boy, perhaps eight or ten, remarkably good-looking, with a warm, happy smile. What happened to that early promise?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eventually I got in the car, and it took me ten minutes to get into the road. Not particularly because it was snowy and slippery, or because it was rush hour and there was traffic going both ways. The people next door had decided to clear a space from their drive, a car's width. The snow they'd cleared was banked up on both sides. The half on my side was right in front of my wheels, so I had to get across it or miss it by driving across the kerb.
In the words of my wise sprog: If you stopped talking to all the people who don't think, you'd have nobody left to talk to. |
Reply #2174. Dec 23 10, 2:47 PM
|
Jazmee27
|
"If you stopped talking to all the people who don't think, you'd have nobody left to talk to."
I like that (wish I'd thought of it myself)!
Reply #2175. Dec 23 10, 5:43 PM
|
redwaldo
|
Merry Xmas Lesley-It will be 37C for Xmas day in my part of Australia!
Reply #2176. Dec 23 10, 7:11 PM
|
| Lochalsh
|
I looked at "37C" and thought for a moment it was an underwear size. I've gotta get a grip! Frenzied festive time!
Reply #2177. Dec 23 10, 9:26 PM
|
Jazmee27
|
Merry Christmas, Lesley!
Reply #2178. Dec 23 10, 9:45 PM
|
playmate1111
|
Hi Lesley, Merry Christmas and the same to all of you. Redwaldo, I am a South African and we are expecting very much the same temperatures as you. Hot, Hot, Hot!
Reply #2179. Dec 23 10, 10:51 PM
|
| veronikkamarrz
|
A Very Merry Christmas wish for you Lesley, and Jonathan and Lyndsey! Jonathan is a wonder, and I know..that YOU know, how lucky you are. :)
Did the car 'de-frost' itself and take you where you needed to be?
I now have a garage with remote control, ONLY for my car! I love not having to 'de-frost!' Oh, did I say that...?;)
Reply #2180. Dec 23 10, 11:20 PM
|
Legal / Conditions of Use
|
Play Now! 
: