| lesley153
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| I wish I had better recall of the conversation. She didn't say anything about hoping he'd change, just about accepting him as he was, although she might have been thinking and hoping it. The only thing I think I remember saying was that I hoped she'd be happy, and wouldn't find that she now had two children. |
Reply #981. Aug 02 10, 5:12 AM
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guitargoddess 
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"Maybe she thinks she will change him. Don't they all?"
Nope. Some of us young gals think it's better to know his shortcomings going into it... then you're not surprised when he disappoints you.
Reply #982. Aug 02 10, 10:54 AM
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honeybee4
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I was talking about women already in her situation. You are a smart girl, GG.
Reply #983. Aug 02 10, 11:59 AM
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| lesley153
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Maybe she really is prepared to accept a selfish boy for her husband - or maybe she's hoping that someone will tell her "Don't do it! Run!" I don't suppose anyone will ever know.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This afternoon I settled down with a sandwich - wholemeal bread - and a crumb went down the wrong way. I hadn't coughed like that since since I was in hospital. Cough splutter and then I did something really silly - I answered the telephone.
"My name is Elaine, I'm one of the cardiac nurses at Papworth, and I wondered how you were getting on."
Nice timing, that. I was coughing so much that she offered to give me a couple of minutes to stop coughing, and I took her up on it.
Eventually I could speak again, and she said I sounded like I was making good progress. It's just that you're not supposed to tell a cardiac nurse how well you think you're doing, while you deafen her by coughing your head off.
I don't suppose it's ever too late to learn how to eat, is it?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jonathan accompanied me to the "New Patient Health Check" at the new practice last week, and I am still impressed by their efficiency and professionalism.
We saw the senior practice nurse, and I introduced him as my eyes, ears and brain. She took a lot of basic observations, like pulse and blood pressure, and said that everything was perfect, and my healing was doing all the right things.
He mentioned my old practice, and she said she knows the people. I remembered later that the newest one to join them used to work at the practice I've just joined. She said she would place all the problems I've had very firmly at the door of my GP.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
She said I was a very lucky lady, and the surgeon told Jonathan that I had been a very unwell lady. Sounds about right. |
Reply #984. Aug 02 10, 5:15 PM
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| Professer
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Glad new GP surgery is good, mine is a s efficent as ever i rang about appointments being cancelled and she said to recpetionist that they said surgery cancelled she transferred me to the appointments boooking receptionist who investigated, said it was because i was away they had been cancelled even though i was home and available for them. she re booked them and i said tghanks is 2 weeks away but hey the original appointment was day after i was admitted to hospital and that they refused to see me, how ever it has transpired they should still have seen me. So the appointment i was supposed to have as a urgent appointment within two weeks of doctor contacting them has now taken 9 weeks. So hospital ius crap but Doctors still bril;liant. Did extoll the high praise i had for michelle my GP and the girl/woman said she will be pleased to hear that.
Reply #985. Aug 03 10, 1:06 AM
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| lesley153
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Gary, that must be very frustrating, losing appointments because of red tape or misunderstandings.
Thank you for your email about your trip too.
Just one little thought - your news is getting more and more fragmented. When people check your blog for news of your trip, or health news, they won't find anything. Wouldn't it make more sense to use your blog to keep all of us up to date with what's happening with you? |
Reply #986. Aug 03 10, 9:07 AM
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| Lochalsh
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Professer, with all due respect, isn't this blog about Lesley? I know that we're certainly permitted, even encouraged, to respond to whatever she posts herself, but your last post had one sentence dedicated to the valuable report Lesley just gave us, and the rest was all about your experiences with your own health care. That seems a bit self-centered to me when Lesley has just undergone very serious surgery and needs our support and attention.
This is not to say I don't care about what you go through. Your travails are as important as those of any other of my fellow human beings, but I do think they belong in your own blog. By the way, I do think I read just recently of your appointment hassles there.
I don't mean to be unkind. I just think your blog is yours, and Lesley's is hers.
Reply #987. Aug 03 10, 10:56 AM
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| lesley153
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Thanks, Lochalsh, and yes, all support is welcome and has been for a long time now.
I don't think you're being unkind at all. Most of my posts recently have been about my journey from being at a complete loss and having a terminally incompetent GP, to diagnosis and full repair, and probably not a moment too soon. I confess it's been a longer journey than I'd have hoped.
This is one of the instances where staying on topic is a good thing, and constantly dashing between doctors and tests and medical departments and consultants and surgeries/practices and hospitals does start to get confusing.
Perhaps we could have a thread where we could recount all our medical disappointments (Deunan, where are you?) but then it wouldn't be a blog. |
Reply #988. Aug 03 10, 11:48 AM
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| Lochalsh
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It's easy to support you, Lesley. First of all, you have a wonderful personality and express it so well in your fine writing. Secondly, you've not just complained about your physical state and your medical treatment (and when you have, you've been justified in doing so); you've also leavened the more serious stuff with your good humor and an obviously sincere concern for others. You realize that a blog has an interlocutory component, and you pay heed to it.
I'm less comfortable with any person who complains and has very little else to say. We're all adults, and it's about give and take, about reciprocal communication.
Thank you for being a true conversant, one who offers and one who receives.
Reply #989. Aug 03 10, 11:59 AM
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| Lochalsh
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I think I'll leave discussions of medical disappointments to the rest of you. My dad was sick for thirteen years and died when I was thirteen, and my dearly beloved also suffered a long terminal illness. I've lived in the shadows of others' illnesses for a great portion of my life, and, now that I'm facing my own health issues, I find it hard to dwell on them. I know: that's avoidance, but we all have our ways of coping. Meanwhile, a good exchange and better health to all of you!
Reply #990. Aug 03 10, 12:06 PM
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Deunan
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I'm here, Lesley.
I am so overjoyed you are posting once again. It was way too quiet around here while you were in hospital.
All of this just proves what a good doctor can do.
When you are fully recovered, I shall invite you to join me in a very happy dance....cha cha cha.
Reply #991. Aug 03 10, 12:29 PM
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| lesley153
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Thank you, Lochalsh, I am now blushing for England. Yes we do what we need to cope but we don't go into denial, do we? Better health to us all.
And thank you Deunan too. I shall try to be a noisier person. It's too early to risk a happy dance, because I'm worried I might fall over, but MarchHare suggested a Happy Wiggle. Brilliant or what?
A few loose ends:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Professer #865 and veronikkamarrz #877 both referred to my op as a procedure. I know someone who had treatment for arrhythmia, and an angioplasty, and she called them both procedures. Is it my imagination or is it just heart surgery that's referred to as procedure? It seems odd. I wonder how it started.
I told her (the "someone" - I don't believe anybody on FT knows her) something I mentioned here a few weeks ago, that I'd struggled to empty the dishwasher three days earlier but hadn't had the energy to start filling it again.
So what are you doing?" she asked me. "Washing up by hand?"
Hah! clueless! How many superlatives do you have to use before people understand the word "exhausted"?
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#898 "I;m sure when Lesley comes round she'll be very pleased it's all been done"
David, that's the understatement of the month! :)
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#904 & 906 Judy and VM
The first one in 1997 was "open heart" and so was this one. Jonathan found me a recording of bypass surgery, done at Papworth and shown on TV only a few months ago. That was nice of him. The commentary was shared by the surgeon operating and the surgeon in the studio. Members of the studio audience asked about "minimally invasive" surgery, and the reply was that they prefer to do it this way because they think you can do a better job: that you can wallpaper the front hall through the letterbox but you might not like the result. Ouch.
When I had it done in 1997, the new valve wasn't perfectly sealed (this happens to about one lucky person in four) so I needed to be taken back into theatre and have it all done again. This time, they found another valve that needed repairing. I'm sure both jobs were easier to do through a split sternum than they would have been through portals.
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#923 What a relief to see poneke back after her last thud!
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#931 SMW, that's a really impressive bit of tracking. How did you find him?
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#969 "What the Victorians really meant when they said a minute before midnight was worth two after: phone calls, not chat!"
David, I meant to say phone calls, not **sleep**, but I'm sure you all guessed that.
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#974 Deunan, I thoroughly enjoyed my chicken and lettuce sandwich, thank you. Perfectly delicious.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Squisher, you haven't been on for a few days - where and how are you?
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Reply #992. Aug 03 10, 4:23 PM
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honeybee4
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Lesley, Squisher is my teammate and she went to B.C. for a soccer tournament and will be back the 5th or 6th.
Reply #993. Aug 03 10, 5:11 PM
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| lesley153
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| Ooh that's nice. Hope she's enjoying it. Thanks, Judy. :) |
Reply #994. Aug 03 10, 5:33 PM
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| veronikkamarrz
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Maybe 'procedure' is just what we hope will be easier, less painful, safer...you know, than SURGERY! Yikes! I'm not sure, but now that you say it, a procedure sounds more like a simple thing.
I know this wasn't the case. So happy you're back! :)
Reply #995. Aug 03 10, 10:04 PM
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| lesley153
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So it's just a euphemism - nice theory, hadn't thought of that. Harder to spell, though - oh no, hang on, I've lost count of the number of times I've seen "sugery"! If I listen now, I shall probably find it being applied to everything!
Thank you, I too am rather pleased to be back. :) |
Reply #996. Aug 04 10, 5:42 AM
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| lesley153
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Before Jonathan went to Devon, we went to see a concert by the county youth orchestra, although he hasn't played in it for about four years. He arranged to meet an old friend, and met a lot more: I met some old friends without planning to.
The first half was something by Hindemith - beautifully played but very Bang Crash and I was waiting for a tune for quite a long time! The second half was a Tchaikovsky symphony, which was much easier to listen to.
Afterwards, he dropped me home (!) and joined musicians past and present for a restaurant meal. Curry for thirty - lovely. Actually it was the same restaurant where we stopped for a take-away on the way home from the hospital, and that was delicious, so this would have been too. I am very slightly envious. Perhaps we'll get the chance to go again, to take away or eat in, either would be good.
I may be able to drive again after the 15th of August, if my GP says OK. Apparently you're not supposed to drive within less than a month after heart surgery, so my insurance would be invalid. I don't know what the criteria are, but I have an idea that a stable sternum is one of them. Can't wait to hop in the car and go!
I've just realised why the date is familiar - it's my wedding anniversary! or at least would have been. Not actually that important now. When I'm a bit stronger, I may celebrate being single. |
Reply #997. Aug 04 10, 12:27 PM
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| Lochalsh
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Were you a lovely August bride? I was, but I didn't realize it at the time. Ah, to have soft skin, bright eyes, shiny hair, and unlimited energy again!
And, Lesley, don't worry, there are many, many curries in your future. (I'm sincere; would I try to curry favor with you, after all?)
Reply #998. Aug 04 10, 12:59 PM
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| lesley153
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I don't know about a lovely August bride but definitely a wet August bride - white dress, soggy black hem and yellow rosebuds - so much energy, and everyone asking me 1. why are you wearing your glasses and 2. are you going to give up work?
I'm wearing my glasses so I can see where I'm going. There's some myth that removing glasses increases physical beauty. Perhaps it does if you can do it without walking into things and tripping over everything else.
I said I didn't see why being married to me was a good excuse for him to stop working, and got a lot of funny looks for that. It's what you get when they don't get the answer they're expecting.
The curry I had last month was the first one I'd had for more than twenty years, I thoroughly enjoyed it, and am now looking forward to having another one. I think I'll just answer your joke with a groan for now - hope that's OK. :) |
Reply #999. Aug 04 10, 1:14 PM
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| Lochalsh
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Well, many of us were brought up on Dorothy Parker's admonition that "men seldom make passes / at girls who wear glasses."
Woman as prey. Those lines above remind me of Ogden Nash's advice for hunting the female sex down: "Candy is dandy, / But liquor is quicker."
It's a wonder that those of us who were reared by readers of Parker and Nash ever succeeded in establishing our own identities. (Granted, DP made her remark with tongue firmly in cheek."
Am I divagating too much? I'd imagine you need some diversion from remembrance of surgeries / procedures just now past, but I'm glad to talk about your heart as well, bless the dear thing.
You sound so good these days!
Reply #1000. Aug 04 10, 2:03 PM
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