I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon, and a cat that comes home late at night. ~Marie Corelli
To keep your marriage brimming,
With love in the loving cup,
Whenever you're wrong, admit it;
Whenever you're right, sh__ up.
The filter would not accept the original quote(;
Reply #361. Apr 22 12, 12:51 PM
Thirteen children and all by caesarean section. Wow! And not one of them able to bathe themselves, do their own homework, or help around the house? Someone sure did something wrong somewhere with the rearing bit, wouldn't you say? |
Not to mention that a little self control might have been a good idea.
As for hubby and his awfulness. Well, you get what you pay for - or like for like, as they say.
Please don't forget the cherry for daver's martini. :)
Reply #362. Apr 22 12, 12:58 PM
A (presumably traditional) martini with a cherry??|
Reply #363. Apr 22 12, 6:22 PM
I was thinking more along the lines of deflowering, really.|
Something to ease the tension. Make a few more babies, cart out some old terry nappies, heat up the milk ( put her in a steam room), type of thing.
Reply #364. Apr 22 12, 6:29 PM
Deflowering?? Children, run, hide - save yourselves!|
We get what we pay for? You think women pay for that??
The current lives of women are actually punishment for sins committed in a previous existence.
When they were men.
Reply #365. Apr 22 12, 7:03 PM
|Now, see, this is the problem with women. In western countries they get treated well, and do nothing but complain. In Arab countries, they can't vote, can't drive, can't go out in public without their faces covered, and have to share their husband with three other women. You don't hear them complaining.|
Reply #366. Apr 22 12, 7:08 PM
Yes, the hell of the current lives of women. How...oh how do they manage even to find that switch to turn on the washing machine, let alone understand the instructions? How on earth do they manage the pure hell of opening a frozen food packet and putting into an oven and thus, feed their 1.3 scale family. Oh...sob...the pure hell of it all. Poor dears.|
And now, throughout these hellish years for women, whose days are wrecked if even so much as for one minute they are interrupted from a soap opera, or from smearing some kind of chemical concoction over their faces - let us remember them. Let us have a one minute silence for 'Whinging Women.'
Reply #367. Apr 22 12, 7:35 PM
It's not that they can't vote - it's just that they can't be bothered voting for any man. Same bellow, different bull.|
They don't drive because they're smart. Why keep a dog and do your own barking?
They're happy with the ration of 4 women to one male in the marriage field - because three other women get to put up with the idiot as well. It's a form of solidarity.
They keep their faces covered when they go out in public, not because they're afraid that the morally weak men will be tempted by their beauty - but because they're killing themselves laughing at them.
Reply #368. Apr 22 12, 7:39 PM
ROFL! Neat. :)|
Reply #369. Apr 22 12, 7:42 PM
Wow, we're recognised at last! A minute's silence. Way up there with the ANZACS.|
I thoroughly concur that we should have a minute's silence for women, whinging or otherwise - as long as you stop moaning for the rest of the day as well.
Reply #370. Apr 22 12, 7:50 PM
Hmmmm.. after reading through this, I've come to the conclusion I've been doing things wrong for the last 45 years. |
First, I started working in shearing sheds (at that point an almost exclusively male domain) at the age of 14, during my school holidays, in order to save enough money to buy my own car. No male generated handout there.
Then at the age of 19, I married. My husband suffered from a debilitating genetic disorder, so apart from a few months off for the birth of our three kids, I was the main breadwinner for the family until his death at the age of 42.
I kept on working (and until 1994 when I was able to hand over to the oldest son, running the family farm at the same time), met up with a high school boy friend who later became my second husband and moved from a farm house to a caravan that went from one work location to another.. no electricity in most cases.
We finally found a derelict house, renovated it.. and I don't mean called in a contractor to do things.. I can mix cement, plaster walls, lay bricks and many of the other tasks required in renovation.. and those I didn't know, I quickly learned !
His wages went on his beer, smokes and paying our bill at the hardware shop.. mine was what paid food, the mortgage and our other bills.
He died ten years ago of a melanoma.. being a nurse, I suggested several times he have "that spot" checked out, but he refused until it was too late.
I'm not whinging, I wouldn't have had my life any other way except to have had him live to a ripe old age...
But... after all that, what I'd actually like to know is where do I find one of these "cash cow" type husbands ??
Reply #371. Apr 22 12, 9:15 PM
Apparently in Arab countries, Tezza. I've just booked a flight there - with my geiger counter|
Reply #372. Apr 22 12, 10:18 PM
Can we go sharsies Creedy :)|
Reply #373. Apr 22 12, 10:32 PM
Absolutely, Playmate - now we just need two other women as well.|
"Oh you're home Shiek...Lord and Master. Goodo, now could you drive us over to the grocery store, and the dress shop, and the ice-cream parlour and the beauty parlour so we can spend your money?
And we need to get a new burka or two at the Burka or Two Shop. You can run along and vote while we're doing that. Oh, and it's wife number four who's on duty tonight. Could you drive us to the movies until you're finished? We'll get you some dinner at Red Rooster on the way home.
Oh, one more thing...Lord and Master. Our mothers are all coming for a holiday on the weekend. You'll be surrounded by doting mothers-in-law for an entire month"
Reply #374. Apr 22 12, 11:41 PM
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