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Topic: Jaymee's Ravings

Posted by: Jazmee27

Subject: Jaymee's Ravings
Date: May 01 12

First of all, what's up with the phrase "rules are rules"? It's either said by those who are too strict with their "enforcement of said "rules," or they're too lax.

Second I'd like to thank everyone reading this--and assure you, yet again, that my previous blogs having been deleted are completely and categorically my fault. **You did nothing *wrong.

Which brings me to another rant: why is it some people (nobody on here, I'm sure) can't accept responsibility for*anything. "If blame is to be going around... just don't look at me."



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2928 replies. On page 51 of 147 pages. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147
Jazmee27

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Dreams are another matter entirely. Some could just be you’re average dream or nightmare; most, however, are visions—including the “dream variety,” which combines aspects of past, present and future. More about that later. (Except to say the events of a vision could be happening at the exact time you have it.)

Reply #1001. Jun 25 12, 8:48 PM

Jazmee27

======
We have these Powers, or Gifts, which seem at times to be as unpredictable as all get out. For instance, one can be having a dream or nightmare, only to wake up and find yourself burned. Or a friend may tell you he or she had the same dream you did because you were doing something in your sleep called projecting. Anything making sense yet? I didn’t think so… Welcome to my world, or should I say my universe. (Other times, you could feel like your heart has been ripped from your chest, and what you’re feeling is another’s pain… and I haven’t even mentioned magical bonds yet.)

Reply #1002. Jun 25 12, 8:49 PM

Jazmee27

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If I seem unable to concentrate on any one thing for more than a second or two, if my thoughts seem like scattered scraps of paper, then that’s probably a good description. My grades, which were never anything to get excited over, are dropping. In fact, the other day Cheveyo Ramirez (the Headmaster) told me if I’m not careful I have to repeat everything next year. I really wouldn’t like that, and the mere thought fills my body with dread, but I can’t help it; I just can’t seem to function since… since my ninth birthday—OK, technically my thirteenth. Try too hard and I get the worst headaches I’ve had in living memory. (Even those fluctuate in intensity y… and, depending what’s going on, prevent me from protecting myself.)

Reply #1003. Jun 25 12, 8:49 PM

Jazmee27

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Maria Mathiesen (one of my teachers, not to mention the Assistant Headmistress) stopped me on the way out of class today. Reminded me there are Potions that can help my concentration—and my sleep. “Use your resources,” she urged me. Then she paused and just looked at me sadly for a full minute, before finally adding, “the fate of the entire Universe could depend on it.” Great—add more pressure to the fire, why don’t you?

Reply #1004. Jun 25 12, 8:49 PM

Jazmee27

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Since when do we depend on young children to sort out the mess we’re living? Answer: as long as there have been prophecies showing that children are Chosen to clean up said messes. I’ve read enough lately, and seen enough, to tell me it’s not just me. Alonso’s been Chosen, as has twin sisters Anastasia and Anja, who are only six or seven. And then there’s Bheniyto, who’s also known as Aivahri or Qahsanori… he’s just six himself! And those are just those of us on the “good” side, the Protectors, the Forces of Light. Among the Powers of Darkness… not yet, as it could take an entire *day just to go through the list. (Not to mention the more we *think we know, the more we actually have to learn. And it’s always changing, the info we have… there are at least two or three versions of every kingdom’s history—and that’s just a conservative guess.)

Reply #1005. Jun 25 12, 8:50 PM

Jazmee27

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The morning of my birthday I woke up from a nightmare I could already not remember, except for the terror it instilled in me. But I pushed it out of my mind, getting ready for classes as usual. And then… I don’t quite understand it, but suddenly I was on the floor, clutching my chest and gasping. And, it shames me to admit this, as my vision blurred, crying like a baby.

Reply #1006. Jun 25 12, 8:50 PM

Jazmee27

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Through a haze, I saw that evil cousin of mine, the one we call Qydra the A**. He was making some sort of hand motions, I couldn’t tell exactly what because it was becoming harder and harder for me to breathe. He was saying something, too, but the words were muffled as if from a long way off. Then, another stab of pain, and I screamed real loud before blacking out.

Reply #1007. Jun 25 12, 8:51 PM

Jazmee27

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I came to in the Hospital Ward, hooked up to this device I won’t even attempt to describe. My memory of the past few minutes—or so it seemed—had come back to me all in a rush, and I realized my cousin had somehow deactivated my magic. Or, at least, that was part of it. See, draining a person of his or her powers, or preventing said person from using magic, has historically been known to cause no end of disastrous results. As for the intense physical agony I’d felt before I blacked out… I still couldn’t explain that. Still can’t, if truth be told. (Apart from all the blood I lost, certain details still elude me.)

Reply #1008. Jun 25 12, 8:51 PM

Jazmee27

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At some point I must have drifted off to sleep again, because next thing I know someone’s shaking me awake. “Don’t mean to startle you,” said a young, familiar voice, “but you were screaming in your sleep and thrashing about.” Instantly, I was wide awake. “Anastasia,” I exclaimed, surprised to see my friend, “what are you doing here?” And do you know, her cheeks flamed and she had to look away as she replied, “looking in on Alonso.” Which prompted me to ask, “What’s he doing here?” “Why, keeping watch over you,” she explained as if it were the most obvious thing in the universe. **Keeping *watch? Did that mean **protecting *me? That seemed to indicate he knew something I didn’t. (I didn’t try to figure it out, as I was weak and still in a lot of pain, although my physical injuries had already knitted back together a while ago. I guess my magical channels were still raw, having been blasted or whatever.)

Reply #1009. Jun 25 12, 8:52 PM

Jazmee27

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When I was finally able to speak to my twin alone, I demanded some answers: “Why did Anastasia tell me you were ‘keeping watch’ on me? I don’t need—“ “Ontario,” he cut in quickly, “there’s a lot to tell you, but tonight’s not the time. You need to rest and regain your strength.” And no matter how much I begged and pleaded, he wouldn’t give me the answers I so desperately craved. It was one of the most frustrating days of my life. (OK, that’s an exaggeration, but it certainly ranked up there.)

Reply #1010. Jun 25 12, 8:52 PM

Jazmee27

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Random images flash through my mind. Tongues of flame from different years seem to leap and dance before me. Whenever I try to focus on one, though, they disappear. I know they’re just memories, and they can’t hurt me. Still, I feel just as lost and helpless as I did back then. (Some answers, something to help me make the necessary connections, would be helpful.)

Reply #1011. Jun 25 12, 8:53 PM

Jazmee27

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Suddenly, a clear image comes to my mind: my father, the day the soldiers came for him, his only concern for Qorteviyno and myself. I relive the fear, just standing there with wide eyes as those cruel men beat the kindest man I’d ever known to death. I see again my older brother, Orvessano, carry Qori from the room, holding my twin’s face close to his body so he wouldn’t see the blood. While I remained standing there, motionless, feeling my chest tighten and my legs give way. (All these years later, I still wonder… Why? What had he done to elicit such treatment?)

Reply #1012. Jun 25 12, 8:53 PM

Jazmee27

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I don’t know where he was exactly, and in fact I’d forgotten he was still living with us. He was a year or two younger than Qori and I. And I think I only just started to see the strength in him when Father died.
Up to that point, I’d always felt bad for him because, while we’d both lost our mothers, he at least had time to get to know her before she was taken away from him. Flames. They’re there again, getting higher, consuming all in their path… (This is perhaps one of the fuzziest images I have. The palace, burning hotly, my brothers and I safe outside with our little cousin, not realizing anyone was trapped inside.)

Reply #1013. Jun 25 12, 8:54 PM

Jazmee27

======
My recollections of that day are blurry in spots, and slightly different from those who were there. (This is a different scene than that mentioned above, one from a year earlier.) I do remember flames, but then I was being grabbed and transported somewhere, I never did figure out… Anyway, I have a memory of intense pain, of being… what? I don’t want to remember; and yet, at the same time, I do. I feel this need to know warring with the need to forget, to close off what happened so it can never bother me again. (Was it even an actial fire? Could it, perhaps, have been a fire raging inside myself?)

Reply #1014. Jun 25 12, 8:54 PM

Jazmee27

JULIAN VENTRONA
=======
Just because Uncle Chendorri’s dead doesn’t mean his legacy died with him. After all, I was there from the very beginning, right after he was forced to leave his home.
Eight years later, I helped him capture and torture one of the children of the man who drove him from his home. So satisfying, to hear his pittiful cries for mercy. I remember them all, the cries he made as uncle and I whipped the flesh from his bones, the spurts of blood that flew in every direction as I held him down with my Powers and pummeled the life out of him, the feel of his limp body as I choked the very breath for his lungs. Of course, I got in trouble for that last one, but I relish the memory all the same.
Now, I have a chance to finish what uncle started—and I fully intend to do so. It doesn’t even matter to me which brother I get, as killing one invariably destroys the other.

Reply #1015. Jun 25 12, 8:57 PM

Jazmee27

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My plan is simple: to infiltrate that School the Light are so happy about. It can’t be that hard, right? And once I’m in, it’s only a matter of time before an idea comes to me…

Reply #1016. Jun 25 12, 8:57 PM

Jazmee27

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Getting in was far easier than I thought. All I had to do was pretend to be a teenager enrolling in classes; there are always new people entering the School all the time, and more than half are in their teens.
The name I chose was Quintin Connolly. He and his sister, Moira, were prisoners of my uncle several years back. I’m not sure what happened to them, but if anyone gets in my way I have a plan.

Reply #1017. Jun 25 12, 8:58 PM

Jazmee27

CHENDORRI DORSEVAHRTREN
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I’ll show them who’s big stuff. Think they can run me out of my home, do they? Well—we’ll just see.

Reply #1018. Jun 25 12, 8:59 PM

Jazmee27

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I bided my time for eight long years. More than enough time for folks to start to forget. Or, at least, to consider me less of a threat. I almost certainly hurt my cause when they were running me off, screaming and what not. But they’ll not expect this, a calculated and cunning move if ever there was one.

Reply #1019. Jun 25 12, 9:00 PM

Jazmee27

MARKESNO VENTRONA
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Why did no one tell me learning would be so hard? My teachers tell my parents I’m failing every subject. It’s hard for me to do basic stuff, let alone anything else. Even my favorite class, history, is a chore. What am I to do?

Reply #1020. Jun 25 12, 9:01 PM

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