Same old, same old
Work is it's usual self. I was actually composing my resignation letter in my head as I was cleaning. Linda left me a note that I needed to have everything baked off by the time Vicky got in at 2 so she could package. Donuts were to be my last priority but I also needed to detail the cases and my corner. I had everything baked off and the donuts fried by 2. Vicky came in and it took her over 2 hours to work the backstock. She didn't package a thing. Erin came in at 3 and I vented some to her. If I'm told to have something done so someone else can move it along, I expect the next person in the line to do their job. I was in tears before I left. Dad came home at lunch and I was visiting with him. His work is as bad, as is my aunts'. I don't know what the issue is but it's not good.
Whenever I start daydreaming, something pops up to destroy them. Think the cloudbursting scene from the trailer of "Men who stare at goats". I was wandering the store the other day and saw the registry thing. I was composing reception invitations in my head (Please no gifts, the pleasure of your company is enough, ect). Next three days in a row Jason brings up his ex. It may make them better people that they can be friends after having a relationship fall apart. I still have issues with it. Spent most of this morning in tears. I don't know what's wrong with me that despite a year and several months together. I am still trying very hard to put it behind be.
I went to Estes today. Parts of the mall are still standing but are blackened beams. They have that section of the sidewalk blocked. I went into Rocky and saw several bighorn sheep, deer and an elk. Tried to find some peace and didn't quite succeed.
I clean the offices twice a month for a local nonprofit called Ensight. It's a skills center for visually impared people. I was reading their newsletter and saw that they are having financial issues. I was thinking of telling the manager that I'd take less to clean but then I figured I could help out in two ways. So I'm planning on donating most of what they pay me a month back to them and having them make the receipt out in my mom or aunt's name so they can deduct it from their taxes.
I'm sorry that I don't have any happy news and thanks for putting up with me.
Hope everyone is well. Have a happy day.
8 Comments:
I'm sorry too but I have thought for a while that the best thing you can do with your job is tell them to shove it. You're capable and organised: the people around you are neither; save yourself before they drive you round the bend.
Why should your upset at Jason be your fault? I don't understand why he can't see the effect it has on you that he can't let his ex go, and why he can't stop doing it.
Is Estes being rebuilt?
By lesley153, Nov 04 09 4:19 PM
Rayven, tell Jason to stop bring up his ex as follows "you seem to be more interested in her than you are in us"..or words to that effect.
If he states you are insecure, tell him "no". I believe you are just tired of hearing about her. I know I would be very tired of it by now.
No one is "putting up with you". Also, reading your posts are a pleasure even when it is not about candy and roses.
Hugs, kiddo.
By Deunan, Nov 04 09 4:40 PM
I haven't seen any plans but the owner of the mall said they would rebuild. I imagine they will wait until spring to start any major undertakings on it. He does see the effect that mentioning her has on me and views it as a character flaw. He once told me that if we broke up that would probably be the reason.
By rayven80, Nov 04 09 4:40 PM
A CHARACTER FLAW!?! Why yes, it is a character flaw....
FOR HIM!
Sorry for yelling but that was just stupid on his part. It also seems he does it to get under your skin.
Some boyfriend.
I am sorry, Rayven, but I say it like I see it.
You are so better than that.
By Deunan, Nov 04 09 5:17 PM
So you would break up as he can't get over his ex? Yep, that would be the reason.
His loss...your gain.
By Deunan, Nov 04 09 5:18 PM
I love your posts and look forward to them. I wish everything would smooth out for you, work and Jason.I know you care for him and I wish the ex were completely out of the picture.
By honeybee4, Nov 04 09 6:44 PM
Can I hit him, please? It's not easy having a relationship with a man who is perfect - it's exhausting hearing how every single thing that goes wrong is someone else's fault. I did that for nearly 30 years, and there was very little of "me" left at the end of it.
I know it's good most of the time, and that you want it to work. Only you can decide if you're paying too high a price to stay with him.
By lesley153, Nov 05 09 5:25 AM
I love your blog, too.
It's horrid to be in a workplace that makes you unhappy and where you're not appreciated.
I do hope that boyfriend will realise the risk he's taking.
By tobyone, Nov 05 09 1:54 PM