With No Good in my Head
So, here I am. I got home from work quite early today, so this is me finally updating my blog. It's been a long slog these past few months, and my rather unstable mental conditional hasn't exactly given me the want to add another blog entry. But here we go. Hopes, fears, and a good peppering of cussing.
So, the time for going off to University is upon us. Of course, I'm wanting to move in with Col, because the release date is getting nearer and nearer (June 15th, folks, mark it in your complimentary calendar). The only problem is this last little bit of parental interest. My father does not approve of Col at all, and so I have had to cover my own back. I'm moving in with the phantom friend, but now it's come to sorting the house out, this is causing me a lot of stress. Father wants to speak to phantom father of phantom friend, and now I know it would have been much easier on me and everyone else who has to listen to me if I had been honest from the outset. But that wasn't an option here, I'm afraid.
So now I'm wondering - is it going to be easier for me to move into halls and get the house sorted out afterwards? Col wanted me to move in as soon as I got over there, but the stress and trauma it would exert is not worth it at all. So, what am I meant to do? Go through with the lie until I get found out but am far enough away? That would cause me a hell of a lot of anguish and could quite possibly push me over the edge again (make sure I get a padded cell with a lovely view - lots of ducks) or should I let this whole idea slide and go into halls where I can move in with Col later?
{EDIT!}
Back to the crisis in hand - Colin is coming out in 51 days now. It's going well, I suppose. We have the house sorted out, we have the life and everything. I'm currently finding that the best way to deal with this is not to lie, but rather to dance around the truth for a little while, just until the whole thing gets sorted. That way, there is no possibility that I will be held as a liar and disregarded by the familia. This could work.
Incidentally, does anyone know where I can get a fridge in the shape of Olivia Newton-John?
3 Comments:
Lies tend to snowball and you have to have a VERY good memory to what you have said etc. and the longer they go on the worse it gets when it comes to telling the truth!
I guess you have to face the music some time Flynn so will have to tell the truth now. Don't try covering it up anymore it can only make things worse :(
Good luck whatever you decide Flynn :)
By Blueee, Mar 05 07 6:56 PM
This is a little late, hope you see it.
I assume you feel that moving in with the young man is all right because you are an adult, able to make your own choices about your life? Your dad can't tell you what to do because it's your life, all that?
If that is the case, then act like an adult. Own your own life, make your own choices. If your dad disapproves, so be it. If he then refuses to pay for a lifestyle he doesn't approve of, again, be the adult, and pay your own way.
You don't really get to pick and choose which parts of growing up you are willing to do. IF you are a child, living under the protection of your family, then you abide by the rules of the family. If you are an adult, making your own choices, then you take the consequences.
Sorry if this seems harsh, but it's a choice every adult has to make at some point. The more lying and cheating you do on the way to it, the longer your maturity is delayed.
By agony, Mar 29 07 7:44 AM
Just so people know, I'm 20. I've not been a child for quite a while now. Unfortunately, I am the only earning member of the household, and as such the responsible one. Which suchs so hard you couldn't believe, especially since he's my father. But anyway.
The main problem is, coming from a Roman Catholic background, I am reluctant to show my family the one-fingered salute and tell them just where to shove their support. But I know that, deep down, they can pretend to be accepting and still resent the hell out of me for it. That's not a position I want to find myself in, but I know that it is going to happen eventually. And thanks to Agony for the advice - although it could have been more sensitively put.
By Flynn_17, Apr 24 07 3:19 PM