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#335496 - Fri Sep 21 2007 02:59 AM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: Flapflap5]
The_lioness33 Offline
Multiloquent

Registered: Sat Feb 25 2006
Posts: 2869
Loc: Adelaide South Australia    
What do you call 11 lawyers buried up to their necks in your back lawn?

Soccer practice!

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#335497 - Fri Sep 21 2007 10:52 AM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: Eraserhead]
papo2228 Offline
Explorer

Registered: Mon Jul 02 2007
Posts: 91
Loc: Buenos Aires Argentina       
When a door is not a door ?
When it is ajar.
Papo2228

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#335498 - Sun Sep 30 2007 07:56 AM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: Eraserhead]
BrillQuizzer1 Offline
Participant

Registered: Sat Sep 29 2007
Posts: 12
Loc: Reading UK
Three men walk into a bar

Irish man:Oooohhh,mee eeed
English man:Butler,get me some Ice
Scottish man: A large whiskey please mayte
_________________________
I may be Brassy but inside is a heart of Pure Gold

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#335499 - Sun Sep 30 2007 11:25 AM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: BrillQuizzer1]
gillyharold Offline
Forum Champion

Registered: Thu Sep 30 1999
Posts: 5915
Loc: Michigan USA
I found out today through my friends that Las Vegas is home to the world's largest strip club -- "Sapphire."

It has 70,000 feet and 400 topless dancers.

It's like Hooters meets Costco.

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#335500 - Sun Sep 30 2007 09:22 PM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: Eraserhead]
momoapple Offline
Participant

Registered: Sun Sep 30 2007
Posts: 10
Loc: Queensland Australia
This is a really bad one

What do u call it when u slip on 1 banana then on another?

Any one?

Its called a pair of slippers hahahahahah baddest joke ever
_________________________
#I'm sorry but i never apoligise# And remember the meaning of life is ....

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#335501 - Mon Oct 01 2007 04:48 AM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: momoapple]
peggy5 Offline
Explorer

Registered: Sun Jul 08 2007
Posts: 67
Loc: New Zealand
What do you get when you cross a dog with a giraffe?






An animal that barks at planes

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#335502 - Mon Oct 01 2007 02:36 PM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: momoapple]
Flapflap5 Offline
Participant

Registered: Wed Sep 19 2007
Posts: 45
Loc: Pibbley land, comcom
Quote:

This is a really bad one

What do u call it when u slip on 1 banana then on another?

Any one?

Its called a pair of slippers hahahahahah baddest joke ever



its not, why did the chick cross the road is the wrost!
_________________________
Pibbley land its so fun in the mainland of comcom pibbles is to be done

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#335503 - Tue Oct 02 2007 09:19 PM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: Flapflap5]
pu2-ke-qi-ri Offline
Explorer

Registered: Wed Aug 10 2005
Posts: 93
Loc: Austin Texas USA
No, this one is much, much worse! If only for the pretense of learning and poor quality of the pun.

What's that old Hindu cowboy song?
Ohm, ohm on the range.

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#335504 - Tue Oct 02 2007 11:25 PM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: pu2-ke-qi-ri]
Bruyere Offline
Star Poster

Registered: Sat Feb 10 2001
Posts: 18686
Loc: California USA
Found a couple more recently..

What do you get when Steve Jobs hires and fires a lot of people in six months?
An Apple turnover.


It is not a well known fact, but soccer was very popular in ancient Rome. The Coliseum was used for matches. There was a big match planned for one Saturday, and three famous Romans arranged to meet at the Coliseum to see the match (Rome vs. Naples). When the day came, Caesar and Cassius met in their favorite bar, but there was no sign of their friend Brutus. So shortly before the kick-off, they gave up and went to their reserved seats to watch the game.

At half time, Brutus finally arrived "Sorry I'm late," he said. "The wheel came off the chariot, and I couldn't get it fixed. How's the game going?"

"It's been a fantastic game so far," Caesar replied.

"What's the score, then?"

"Eight-two, Brutus."

A man with a cucumber in his ear, a carrot in his nose, and a tomato in his eye walks into the doctor's office. He says, "Doc, I'm not feeling well. What's wrong with me?"

The doctor says, "First of all, you're not eating right...."
_________________________
I was born under a wandering star.

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#335505 - Tue Oct 09 2007 09:12 PM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: Bruyere]
gillyharold Offline
Forum Champion

Registered: Thu Sep 30 1999
Posts: 5915
Loc: Michigan USA
You know sometimes I get the sudden urge to run around naked. But then I just drink some Windex. It keeps me from streaking

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#335506 - Thu Oct 11 2007 05:29 PM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: gillyharold]
Dragonkin Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: Thu Feb 09 2006
Posts: 398
Loc: Oregon USA
Oh, Lord. That was so horrible, it was good. Major-league groaner.
_________________________
You know, just once I'd like to meet an alien menace that wasn't immune to bullets. - Lethbridge-Stewart, (Doctor Who TV series)

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#335507 - Sat Oct 13 2007 08:48 PM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: Dragonkin]
The_lioness33 Offline
Multiloquent

Registered: Sat Feb 25 2006
Posts: 2869
Loc: Adelaide South Australia    
What happened to the sailors when a red ship crashed into a blue ship???

They got marooned!

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#335508 - Sun Nov 04 2007 05:14 PM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: angel_us]
deadlydalton Offline
Explorer

Registered: Mon May 28 2007
Posts: 54
Loc: Ayr Scotland UK
What do you call a Chinese woman with one leg?

Irene.

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#335509 - Thu Nov 08 2007 12:27 AM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: deadlydalton]
The_lioness33 Offline
Multiloquent

Registered: Sat Feb 25 2006
Posts: 2869
Loc: Adelaide South Australia    
Here's one for the Dell haters...

A man walks into a public place carrying a laptop, and leaves it on a bench. He is later accused of being a terrorist. Why?

The laptop was a Dell...Dells blow up.

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#335510 - Mon Nov 12 2007 11:47 PM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: The_lioness33]
romeomikegolf Offline
Multiloquent

Registered: Wed Apr 07 2004
Posts: 4875
Loc: Rothwell Northants England UK 
A man went to see his Doctor with a large fish on his head. The doctor asks "What can I do for you?", the man replies,"It's about this terrible head hake."
_________________________
Reality is an illusion brought about by lack of alcohol

Would the last person to leave the planet please turn off the lights.

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#335511 - Tue Nov 13 2007 10:47 AM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: romeomikegolf]
Jar Offline
Multiloquent

Registered: Wed Apr 11 2001
Posts: 4224
Loc: Texas USA
Great Good Groaner rmg --

But, I don't get the Dell one.....
_________________________
If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there worrying. It's the worry that gets you, not the lack of sleep.
-Dale Carnegie

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#335512 - Wed Nov 14 2007 02:11 AM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: Jar]
The_lioness33 Offline
Multiloquent

Registered: Sat Feb 25 2006
Posts: 2869
Loc: Adelaide South Australia    
Oh, I think there was a thing in the news a while back about a few faulty Dells blowing up in user's laps.

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#335513 - Sat Jan 19 2008 05:51 PM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: The_lioness33]
wigwambam Offline
Participant

Registered: Sun Dec 30 2007
Posts: 27
Loc: Riverland South Australia
What did the letter O say to the number 8?


Nice belt.



Which composer is loved by chickens?


Bach, Bach, Bach, Bach.
_________________________
"Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not." Ralph Waldo Emerson.

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#335514 - Sat Jan 26 2008 03:38 PM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: wigwambam]
highfells Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: Sat Dec 15 2007
Posts: 338
Loc: Gerrard's Ghyll Cumbria UK
What do you call a man sitting on an oil rig?

Derek.
_________________________
I have a photographic memory, but keep forgetting to remove the lens cap...

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#335515 - Sat Jan 26 2008 08:51 PM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: highfells]
The_lioness33 Offline
Multiloquent

Registered: Sat Feb 25 2006
Posts: 2869
Loc: Adelaide South Australia    
Two elephants walk off a cliff...boom, boom!

Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.

Did you hear that noise this morning? I thought it was the break of day, but no, it was the crack of dawn!

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#335516 - Mon Jan 28 2008 01:05 PM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: bethfay]
Woody156 Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: Fri May 14 2004
Posts: 437
Loc: Barrie
Ontario Canada
Did you hear about the concert cellist who liked rap music?

His name was "Yo Yo Ma Ma"!
_________________________
What this world really needs is a Tim Horton's store at Walt Disney World.

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#335517 - Mon Jan 28 2008 01:07 PM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: Woody156]
Woody156 Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: Fri May 14 2004
Posts: 437
Loc: Barrie
Ontario Canada
Did you hear about the taxidermist who decided against running for Mayor?

Too many skeletons in the closet...
_________________________
What this world really needs is a Tim Horton's store at Walt Disney World.

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#335518 - Mon Feb 11 2008 09:02 PM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: Woody156]
littlesuzie Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: Fri Mar 31 2006
Posts: 271
Loc: Melton
VIC Australia
Why was 6 sad. Because 7 8 9

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#335519 - Sat Feb 23 2008 01:36 AM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: littlesuzie]
The_lioness33 Offline
Multiloquent

Registered: Sat Feb 25 2006
Posts: 2869
Loc: Adelaide South Australia    
Some truly horrible jokes coming right up...

Why did the cell cross the microscope?

To get to the other slide.


Teacher: Who invented fractions?

Student: Henry the Eighth

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#335520 - Sun Feb 24 2008 12:43 AM Re: Bad Jokes? Post Here! [Re: angel_us]
MadNotAngry Offline
Learning the ropes...

Registered: Sun Feb 24 2008
Posts: 1
Loc: Unique
New York USA
Quote:

What do you call a woman with one leg?

Eileen.





-----

Quote:

What do you call a Chinese woman with one leg?

Irene.




-----


What do you call a Mexican woman with one leg?

Consuelo


Edited by MadNotAngry (Sun Feb 24 2008 04:31 AM)

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