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#633650 - Sun Jun 12 2011 10:49 PM The Pope and the Jews
palakb Offline
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Registered: Thu Jun 09 2011
Posts: 13
Loc: India
About a century or two ago, the Pope decided that all the Jews had to leave Rome. Naturally, there was a big uproar from the Jewish community. So the Pope made a deal. He would have a religious debate with a member of the Jewish community. If the Jew won, the Jews could stay. If the Pope won, the Jews would leave. The Jews realized that they had no choice, so they picked a middle-aged man named Moishe to represent them. Moishe asked for one addition to the debate. To make it more interesting, neither side would be allowed to talk. The Pope agreed.

The day of the great debate came. Moishe and the Pope sat opposite each other for a full minute before the Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers. Moishe looked back at him and raised one finger. The Pope waved his fingers in a circle around his head. Moishe pointed to the ground where he sat. The Pope pulled out a wafer and a glass of wine. Moishe pulled out an apple. The Pope stood up and said, "I give up. This man is too good. The Jews can stay."

An hour later, the cardinals were all around the Pope asking him what had happened. The Pope said, "First I held up three fingers to represent the Trinity. He responded by holding up one finger to remind me that there was still one God common to both our religions. Then I waved my finger around me to show him that God was all around us. He responded by pointing to the ground and showing that God was also right here with us. I pulled out the wine and wafer to show that God absolves us from our sins. He pulled out an apple to remind me of the original sin. He had an answer for everything. What could I do?"

Meanwhile, the Jewish community had crowded around Moishe. "What happened?" they asked.

"Well," said Moishe, "First he said to me that the Jews had three days to get out of here. I told him that not one of us was leaving. Then he told me that this whole city would be cleared of Jews. I let him know that we were staying right here."

"Yes, yes, and then?" asked the crowd.

"I don't know," said Moishe, "He took out his lunch, and I took out mine."
laugh

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#633692 - Mon Jun 13 2011 08:08 AM Re: The Pope and the Jews
lesley153 Offline
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Registered: Fri Sep 07 2007
Posts: 734
Loc: Bedford England�UK���...
I love this story. Thank you so much for posting it. smile
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#633764 - Mon Jun 13 2011 01:16 PM Re: The Pope and the Jews
fredsixties Offline
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Registered: Wed Oct 01 2008
Posts: 349
Loc: Staten Island
NewYorkUSA
Is this humorous?

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#633791 - Mon Jun 13 2011 03:13 PM Re: The Pope and the Jews
ClaraSue Offline
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Registered: Sun May 18 2003
Posts: 7837
Loc: Arizona USA
Quote:
Is this humorous?


I thought so; it was cute.
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#633800 - Mon Jun 13 2011 05:11 PM Re: The Pope and the Jews
lesley153 Offline
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Registered: Fri Sep 07 2007
Posts: 734
Loc: Bedford England�UK���...
Originally Posted By: fredsixties
Is this humorous?
Yes.
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I appreciate people who are civil, whether they mean it or not. I think: Be civil. Do not cherish your opinion over my feelings. There's a vanity to candor that isn't really worth it. Be kind. ~ Richard Greenberg

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#633826 - Mon Jun 13 2011 05:54 PM Re: The Pope and the Jews
Trigger7 Offline
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Registered: Sat Nov 17 2007
Posts: 109
Loc: Morden ManitobaCanada
Love it palakb! Top Quality Humour - Do You have any more to share with us? Thank You.

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#633829 - Mon Jun 13 2011 05:57 PM Re: The Pope and the Jews
ozzz2002 Offline
Moderator

Registered: Mon Dec 03 2001
Posts: 19936
Loc: Sydney NSW Australia
I moderate in this forum and it was with a large dose of trepidation that I opened this post. Religious humour can be rather insulting in a lot of cases, so I had to be cautious.

My opinion- I think that the joke is rather clever and extremely unlikely to offend.
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#633837 - Mon Jun 13 2011 07:49 PM Re: The Pope and the Jews
LadyCaitriona Offline
Forum Champion

Registered: Thu Feb 08 2001
Posts: 5985
Loc: Ottawa
Ontario Canada
Good one -- made me LOL. grin
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Chan fhiach cuirm gun a comhradh.
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#633859 - Tue Jun 14 2011 01:28 AM Re: The Pope and the Jews
palakb Offline
Participant

Registered: Thu Jun 09 2011
Posts: 13
Loc: India
Thx guys...
I will surely post some more in this forum...

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#633894 - Tue Jun 14 2011 05:57 AM Re: The Pope and the Jews
gillimalta Offline
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Registered: Sat Apr 05 2008
Posts: 142
Loc: Ruthin, North Wales
Made me chuckle! Thanks, Palak.
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#636289 - Thu Jun 23 2011 02:56 PM Re: The Pope and the Jews
lesley153 Offline
Mainstay

Registered: Fri Sep 07 2007
Posts: 734
Loc: Bedford England�UK���...
Another one? (This is old too.)


An old Jewish man lived next door to a Catholic church for many years, and decided one day that he wanted to become a Catholic. So he went to the priest and said "I want to convert." The priest said, "Why? You're an old man, you've been happy your whole life being a Jew, you don't need to convert." But the old man insisted. Again, the priest tried to put him off. The old man came back yet again and said "I want to convert." The priest gave in and said, "OK, I'll make you a Catholic, but remember, Mass every Sunday and NO MEAT ON FRIDAY!"

The priest raised his hands over the old man's head and intoned "Once a Jew, now a Catholic. Once a Jew, now a Catholic." The old man went home and was happy.

A few months later, the priest dropped in to visit him on a Friday, and the irresistible smell of chicken soup filled the man's house. "Solly," he cried, "Youre a Catholic! NO MEAT ON FRIDAY!"

The old man replied "it's not meat." He raised his hands over the pot, and chanted, "Once a chicken, now a fish. Once a chicken, now a fish."
_________________________
I appreciate people who are civil, whether they mean it or not. I think: Be civil. Do not cherish your opinion over my feelings. There's a vanity to candor that isn't really worth it. Be kind. ~ Richard Greenberg

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#636295 - Thu Jun 23 2011 03:12 PM Re: The Pope and the Jews
gillimalta Offline
Forum Adept

Registered: Sat Apr 05 2008
Posts: 142
Loc: Ruthin, North Wales
That's great! Not heard it before, thanks Lesley!
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Just Alassin Sane...

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#636297 - Thu Jun 23 2011 03:17 PM Re: The Pope and the Jews
lesley153 Offline
Mainstay

Registered: Fri Sep 07 2007
Posts: 734
Loc: Bedford England�UK���...
Thanks, Gill, glad you like it. smile
_________________________
I appreciate people who are civil, whether they mean it or not. I think: Be civil. Do not cherish your opinion over my feelings. There's a vanity to candor that isn't really worth it. Be kind. ~ Richard Greenberg

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