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#783503 - Mon Apr 02 2012 11:00 PM Re: Funny Headlines
mountaingoat Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: Fri Jun 22 2007
Posts: 390
Loc: Blue Mountains NSW Australia
Reported in a Sydney paper many years ago when Bob Hawke was our Prime Minister at at trade negotiation in Japan. He said "We are not going to be silly buggers about this." The translator translated it as "We are not going to be humorous homosexuals about this."

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#793591 - Fri May 11 2012 12:55 AM Re: Funny Headlines
Mariamir Offline
Multiloquent

Registered: Wed Feb 29 2012
Posts: 4258
Loc: Ontario Canada
In front of a church:

Come here, we will scare the hell out of you.

And another:

Salvation guaranteed, or sins cheerfully refunded.

And some in China:

The elevator

The Chinese translated properly:
In case of fire, please do not used the elevator

Actual warning:
If fired, please do not use the elevator

The Floor

Translated properly:
Be careful, the floor is slippery

Actual warning:
Caution, slip (h'm, if I have to slip to be cautious, then I won't be cautious.)


Edited by Mariamir (Fri May 11 2012 12:56 AM)
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#793650 - Fri May 11 2012 09:25 AM Re: Funny Headlines
navaho56 Offline
Participant

Registered: Sat Nov 24 2007
Posts: 14
Loc: Glasgow Scotland
When the underdogs Caledonian Thistle beat the massive odds on favourites Celtic in a national cup final due to their celebrations the newspaper headlines read ~

"Super Caley Go Ballistic, Celtic Are Atrocious."

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#793663 - Fri May 11 2012 10:11 AM Re: Funny Headlines
Mariamir Offline
Multiloquent

Registered: Wed Feb 29 2012
Posts: 4258
Loc: Ontario Canada
Lol, that rhymes perfectly with supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.
_________________________
Secret, shall I tell you? Quiz author at FunTrivia am I. Won this job in a raffle I did, think you?

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#794242 - Sun May 13 2012 06:51 PM Re: Funny Headlines
mountaingoat Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: Fri Jun 22 2007
Posts: 390
Loc: Blue Mountains NSW Australia
A friend swears that when in Ireland he saw a sign that said "Do not remove this sign." Nothing else was on it.

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#794724 - Tue May 15 2012 05:38 PM Re: Funny Headlines
underscored Offline
Forum Adept

Registered: Sun Jan 08 2012
Posts: 101
Loc: Bendigo Victoria Australia   

NEWSPAPER HEADLINE


SISTER SAVED FROM CERTAIN DROWNING BY BROTHER WHO USED HEIMLICH MANOUVRE - "I SAW IT BEING DONE ON TELEVISION HE SAID then added "BUT AS SHE HAS BEEN A REAL PAIN THIS WEEK I WOULD NOT DO IT AGAIN"
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#800408 - Thu Jun 07 2012 01:02 PM Re: Funny Headlines
tjoebigham Offline
Multiloquent

Registered: Sat Dec 25 1999
Posts: 2824
Loc: Fairhaven Massachusetts USA   
Certainly you must have heard of the funniest headline of all time, from the Enquirer or some other tabloid: Headless Body in Topless Bar

tjoeb};>

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#807040 - Fri Jul 06 2012 10:43 AM Re: Funny Headlines
LeoDaVinci Offline
Moderator

Registered: Fri Mar 23 2001
Posts: 11518
Loc: Ontario Canada
I heard today on the radio that a woman here had complained about a sign on an airport shuttle that tells you the driver's name. Apparently she didn't realize that the driver, who was a recent immigrant, had a name that was not the usual Adam, Michael or Daniel that she was used to.

The sign read...

Quote:
Your driver is: Hung
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#807228 - Sat Jul 07 2012 05:38 AM Re: Funny Headlines
tezza1551 Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: Tue Feb 05 2008
Posts: 439
Loc: Western Australia
I found these in a miniature village in Tasmania:

"Prostitutes appeal to local council"

"Children make nutritious snacks"

"Local steals clock, faces time"

"Police raid phramacy, find drugs"

"Students cook and serve grandparents".....
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#808454 - Fri Jul 13 2012 04:37 AM Re: Funny Headlines
bitterlyold Offline
Forum Adept

Registered: Sat Oct 15 2011
Posts: 122
Loc: Arkansas USA
I got tickled at this recently:

"Woman arrested sending a message to a jail wrapped in an enchilada."

It wasn't a headline, but was a sentence in the story.


Edited by bitterlyold (Fri Jul 13 2012 04:48 AM)

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