A Bit of This and That Trivia Quiz

Answer: Maria Sugarpova

Tennis champ Maria Sharapova was born in Russia in 1987. The family came from a poor background, but managed to scrape together enough money for Maria to attend a tennis clinic being run by former champion Martina Navratilova. Once her potential was acknowledged by this great sportswoman, Maria's father borrowed enough money so he and Maria could move to the United States. There he took any job he could, including that of dishwasher, so that Maria could attend tennis coaching - and the rest is history.

Perhaps as a result of her poor childhood, and knowing that a tennis career in the top ranks is all too brief, Maria, by dint of canny investments and lucrative endorsement deals, is now one of the richest sportswomen in history. Her eight year sponsorship deal with Nike alone has earned her $70 million. In 2013, once her candy manufacturing company, Sugarpova, was established, and desiring to give it as much publicity as possible, Maria applied to have her name temporarily changed. As reported in the UK Daily Mail in August of that year, she planned to play the US Open as Maria Sugarpova. Ultimately, however, common sense - or her dentist - prevailed, and she cancelled the application. Just for the record, a portion of all sales from this company is directed to her charitable foundation, an organisation she established to help families and disadvantaged children from the "Chernobyl affected areas of Belarus".

Looking to the future, when her tennis career is over, Maria has several options open for that next stage of her life. She's not afraid to try anything, and in a revealing, rather touching interview, she recently stated that, "You never know until you try. So if you don't try, you've failed. All I know is, I'm starving to be the best."

Answer: They mooned it

That's disgraceful - and what a gruesome sight. Talk about the Devil's Marbles. I also have a terrible feeling, because of the amount of publicity given to this artistic display, that this will become an annual event. Whatever will the tourists think of us?

Construction on the line from Adelaide to Darwin began way back in 1878 but wasn't completed until 2004, a project that took 126 years. We don't like to hurry things in this country. On its inaugural journey along the completed track, the Ghan passed through Livingstone in the Northern Territory, and this was how 400 residents of the small township of just over 1,000 people welcomed it on that day. On the 10th anniversary on this first journey, as reported in one of the local papers (the Northern Territory News) in February 2014, a smaller contingent of the town's residents, fully fuelled with alcohol, also bared their backsides to honour the occasion as the train rumbled by. One patriotic fellow, dressed in a tutu, even had a small Northern Territory flag on a stick protruding from his rear.

A resident of the township described this as part of the local culture - oh heaven protect me from Australian humour - while another slurred indignantly, "This country is losin' its freedom, that's what, mate, it's losin' its freedom! Its freedom, mate. So this is us jest exercisin' our right to - hic - freedom of speech". One hates to state the obvious, but that's the wrong end, chum.

Answer: Two members of parliament

Oh dear. Let us console ourselves with the knowledge, however, that many members of parliament today are just as dense. Born in 1791, Charles Babbage, who died in 1871, was a polymath with impressive achievements in inventing, engineering, mathematics, astronomy, writing, economics, politics, economics, cryptography, science, theology, logic and philosophy. Gracious! And that was just before lunch. Just a few of his many inventions include that for which he is most famous, the first mechanical computer, an ophthalmoscope, and, rather comically, a cowcatcher for a train.

This fascinating man was quite a character. Among his many peculiarities, he particularly disliked hoop rollers, drunks and organ grinders. Against the latter he led a spirited campaign, complaining that they inflicted their ghastly sounds on thousands of innocents persons on a daily basis. Valuing intelligence and an enquiring mind, you can almost imagine his disdain at being asked such a foolish question regarding his mechanical computer, and by no less than men who were leaders of the nation if you please. Of this, he stated, "On two occasions I have been asked (by members of Parliament!), "Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?" I am not able rightly to apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question".

Answer: They urinate on their own heads and front legs

There are over 300 different breeds of goats in the world. These handy little creatures have been highly valued for thousands of years for the different foods that can be made from their milk and meat, and for their hair, bones, sinews and skins, all of which mankind has utilised in one way or another to make various products. Even their dung is used to provide fire and heat.

There is much similarity of appearance between some breeds of goats and sheep, but the immediate difference can be detected in their tails. Sheep tails usually dangle down, whereas goat tails point up in the air like small exclamation stops, which, for some odd reason strikes me as funny. Another interesting tale about that tail is that when the female comes into heat, she vigorously wags her little tail a lot more often. Oh, the wicked little thing. However, considering the fact that the object of her affection has sprayed his head with urine - a kind of goat aftershave that probably pongs to high heaven - this energetic tail wagging on the part of the female is quite possibly a frantic attempt to clear the air.

Answer: With an impromptu flamenco

To the astonishment of his aides, their exceptionally reserved leader, on hearing the news of his arch-foe's abdication, leapt up and spun round in circles, clicking his fingers and dancing the flamenco. This was so completely out of character for Wellington that their jaws must have dropped in astonishment. Such was the Iron Duke's control over any public display of emotion that he even disapproved of his soldiers cheering. He said of this that it was "Too nearly an expression of opinion".

Apart from the above, Wellington (1769-1852), that great British soldier and twice Prime Minister, was known to only show emotion three other times in public. Two of those were when he broke down in tears at the sight of all his dead men strewn around the battlefields at two of his victories, occasions on which he refused to be congratulated. The other was the day when, looking through his spyglass, he realised the French were going to lose a battle. On that occasion, he threw the chicken leg on which he'd been munching up into the air, and shouted "The French are lost!"

Wellington was also known, for the most part, for his economical use of words in conversation. He had no patience for lengthy, comfortable discussions. When Queen Victoria, upset at the number of sparrows flying around in the Crystal Palace before the opening of the Great Exhibition of 1851, asked his advice on what to do about them, he answered briefly, "Sparrowhawks, ma'am".

Answer: Players must fill up all holes before leaving bunker

The full text of the telegram from the home of Golf in Scotland read, "Warmest congratulations to all of you on your great achievement and safe return. Please refer to the Rules of Golf section on etiquette, paragraph 6, quote - before leaving a bunker a player should carefully fill up all holes made by him therein, unquote". That puts paid to the belief that the Scots don't possess a sense of humour.

Alan Shepard Jr (1923-1998) was an American astronaut who was one of the original Mercury Seven. In 1961, he became the first American to travel into space. Ten years later, in 1971, he took to the heavens again, this time making the record books as the oldest astronaut in the space program. He commanded Apollo 14's landing on the moon on this voyage, and, while on the moon, took the opportunity to hit two golf balls into space. Interesting also is the fact that Shepard was a descendant of one of the original passengers on their historic 1620 voyage to America in the valiant little ship, the "Mayflower". On Shepard's death in 1998, his ashes were scattered at sea. His wife placed a memorial stone at Derry, New Hampshire, where he was born, with an inscription that, in part, reads "Love is eternal".

Answer: I Sits Among the Cabbages and Leeks

The naughty Marie Lloyd lived from 1870 until 1922. At the height of her fame she was a popular international performer, who, when singing even the most innocent of songs, was famed for her use of innuendo, suggestive facial expressions, high kicks and naughty winks that could turn even the most harmless of songs into a dirty ditty. Most audiences adored her, even though she did manage to outrage the more influential and moralistic members of society. Many of her songs lent themselves to this risqué interpretation and Marie made full use of this. These included numbers such as "She'd Never Had Her Ticket Punched Before" and "The Wrong Man Never Let a Chance Go By" and "Come Into the Garden, Maud", and, of course, her famous "She sits Among the Cabbages and Peas" number.

To the delight of her audiences, but the horror of management, Marie was notorious for ad-libbing during her acts as well. An example of this was during one Christmas pantomime, when, during one scene where she was supposed to get out of bed to kneel down beside it to pray, she knelt down beside it and pulled out a chamber pot instead. The well known British writer, Sir Compton MacKenzie (1883-1972), when taken along to see one of Marie's performance as a boy, later wrote that he was "greatly surprised that any girl should have the courage to let the world see her drawers as definitely as Marie Lloyd". Marie answered all her critics with the response that "They don't pay their sixpences and shillings at a music hall to hear the Salvation Army".

Sadly though, Marie Lloyd's personal life was anything but comical. Married three times, two of her husbands, jealous of her success, constantly beat her. This eventual saw her health deteriorating and she began to drink heavily, which in turn saw her performances on stage suffer. She died in poverty in 1922 when her heart and kidneys finally gave their last performance. Such was the extent of her popularity that, even though she hadn't performed for some time, over 50,000 people attended her funeral.

Answer: Twelve dancing rabbits with toilet paper

The rather yummy-looking Rod Serling was not just your average run of the mill writer. He wrote for the screen and the stage, was a television producer, worked as a narrator, and authored novels and short stories in between times. He also taught whenever he could fit a few spare hours into his hectic schedule. As an example of his powerful work, Serling's pen gave us the science-fiction series "The Twilight Zone" (1959-1964), which revolved around chilling stories of a paranormal nature. This complex, highly driven, intensely motivated writer was described by many as the typical "angry young man" of his era, and he was notorious for his clashes with politicians, executives and sponsors over the racism, war and censorship issues of his time. Rod Serling made the above comical quote about television in 1974, during an interview with the "Washington Post" newspaper.

His death, which came in 1975 after a series of heart attacks - given his fiery, driven nature, this is not totally surprising - was faced as bravely and defiantly as every other issue he faced in his life. Of that ultimate journey, and via the voice of one of his characters, he had this to say: "As long as they talk about you, you're not really dead, as long as they speak your name, you continue...". This question then enables the feisty Rod Serling to continue to live just that little bit longer.

Answer: Doughnuts

How fascinating is that? Going right back to the days of the Aztecs and the Mayans, the scent of vanilla was used as an aphrodisiac. Such was its value that it was used as a currency and trading commodity at that time as well. By the 19th century, apothecaries in the European world had learned of vanilla's benefits and were manufacturing tinctures of this timeless Viagra to sell to gentlemen needing help. Perfume manufacturers a century later were creating many perfumes with a vanilla base because of the continuing belief in its effects.

To test this theory, the Smell and Taste Treatment and Research Foundation in Chicago recently carried out tests to see if Vanilla did indeed have this effect on men. A sample of males aged between 18 and 64 were tested with 24 different scents to see if they produced any increase in arousal. Results showed that older men did indeed respond strongly to vanilla, but younger age groups responded more to doughnuts with black licorice, but not to doughnuts with cola oddly enough. The strongest average reaction of all men though was to a combination of lavender and pumpkin pie, while the least reaction was to buttered popcorn. Peculiarly so, the scent of vanilla also has a calming effect, so perhaps consider that if you are tempted to try out this perfume on older gentlemen, ladies. They'll either be downright frisky - or nod off instead. If the latter is the matter, wave a slice of pumpkin pie under their noses. That should do the trick.

Answer: Switched the names of the mountains

Crazy, but true. Rather than going to all the bother of changing all the printed material regarding this newly discovered information, with Mount Townsend now shown to be taller than Mount Kosciuszko, this New South Wales government department, with a slash of its dubious pen, simply switched the names of the two mountains instead. Surely that has to be wrong. It's almost akin to switching babies in the nursery. Why, any day now I expect to go out my front door to find I'm no longer living along the east coast of Australia, but have been relocated to the Sahara Desert instead.

The most annoying thing about this fine piece of public service thinking is that Mount Townsend is SO much easier to spell than Mount Kosciuszko .