Name That Episode: Season 1 Trivia Quiz

Answer: "Germ Warfare"

Hawkeye and Trapper trick Frank into drinking a beer so they could obtain a urine sample. Then, while they are waiting for the test results, they have to make sure that Frank doesn't operate on patients (or on Margaret). They even go so far as to handcuff his arms around Margaret so that he won't enter the operating room and potentially spread the disease.

Answer: "Yankee Doodle Doctor"

They have had enough of the Hollywood director, so Hawkeye and Trapper break into the foot locker where the film is kept and expose it. They then come up with the brilliant idea to make the film themselves, including such probs as a rubber chicken, "rusty" saw, and a watch lost in a patient's abdomen. Hawkeye's monologue at the end is the most touching.

Answer: "M*A*S*H - The Pilot"

Hawkeye and Trapper sedate Frank, wrap his head in gauze, and put him in post-op so that he can't interfere. They obviously underestimate Margaret's abilities and connections, as she is the one that calls the general. As for who "won" the delectable Lieutenant Dish, that would be Father Mulcahy!

Answer: "To Market, To Market"

Henry is so proud of that desk; he brags about it like a father would brag about his newborn baby. Hawkeye and Trapper first went to Henry to try to get more Hydrocortizone. Henry, trying not to make waves, doesn't push the issue when he is turned down, leaving Hawkeye and Trapper to their own devices. I'll bet Henry was regretting that move when he saw his desk fly away!

Answer: "Showtime"

I'm surprised that the dentist also didn't give up eating in the mess tent for fear of food poisoning (I sure would have). He ends up breaking his leg when he hits the gas instead of the break on his way to the airport. After many phone calls and one false alarm, Henry finds out that he has a son (unfortunately, he never gets to meet this child, as he is killed at the end of the third season).

Answer: "Bananas, Crackers and Nuts"

Written by Burt Styler, and excellently directed by Bruce Bilson, this is easily one of my favorite episodes. In order to convince Frank and Margaret that Hawkeye really has lost it, he dresses in his operating garb (including gloves) and eats a liver that he claims to have taken from a North Korean that died.

The final straw for the two Majors is when Hawkeye attacks Frank for touching his plate when he "wasn't sterile". Captain Sherman has a crush from long ago on Major Houlihan, and in a later episode, is portraying a cosmetic surgeon on the hunt for the "barracuda", which he believes is Margaret. Very funny.

Answer: "I Hate A Mystery"

Among the missing items was a silver picture frame belonging to Frank, Margaret's hairbrushes, Trapper's watch, and Hawkeye's "stizzle swick". Hawkeye's trap was ingenious, and couldn't have proved any better that he was innocent. By the way, shouldn't Ho-Jon be in school in the United States?

Answer: "The Longjohn Flap"

A freebie to my fellow M*A*S*H-aholics, this episode was written by none other than Alan Alda himself. The longjohns are first in Hawkeye's possession, a gift from his father. From there they are passed to Trapper, Radar, the cook, Frank, Margaret, Klinger, Father Mulcahy, Henry, and finally back to Hawkeye again.

It was a fun episode of bribery, thievery, confession, and zany antics that only the 4077th can provide!

Answer: "Major Fred C. Dobbs"

I know, Frank put in his request for transfer before the conversation incident took place. This scene was adapted from the movie, in which the same thing takes place (that's where they find out that Margaret's nickname is 'Hot Lips'). In my honest opinion, the broadcast scene in the movie is funnier than the one in this episode.

Answer: "The Ringbanger"

Brilliantly played by Leslie Neilson, Buzz Brighton arrives at the 4077th with a slug in his butt. Among the pranks the pair of zany doctors play on him is constantly moving the speaker to the P.A. (public announcement) system (which indicates which tent Buzz is residing), getting Colonel Blake drunk and then telling him that he needs to earn a special merit badge for night shooting, convincing Buzz that Frank is gay, and that Margaret is a boozer.

They finally do convince Buzz to take some time off in States.