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Python Python Python Trivia Quiz

Love your Python? So do I... (Not for the faint-hearted or easily offended.)

A multiple-choice quiz by alkmene. Estimated time: 6 mins.

Author
alkmene

Time
6 mins

Type
Multiple Choice

Quiz #
171,594

Updated
Dec 03 21

# Qns
20

Difficulty
Tough

Avg Score
11 / 20

Plays
2002

Awards
Top 35% Quiz

One at a Time - Single Page - Timed Game

Question 1 of 20

1. Who is contesting the North Minehead By-Election? Hint

Edward Heath

Mr Hilter

Edmund Wilson

Carol Cleveland

NEXT>

Question 2 of 20

2. Which of the following is not engaged in a life-and-death struggle? Hint

Heinz Sielmann and Peter Scott (later joined by an enraged Jacques Costeau)

An ant and a wolf

Mr Ford and the City Gent

Two bull limpets on a rock

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Question 3 of 20

3. 'You can still hear Beethoven, but Beethoven...'

Answer: (Three words)

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Question 4 of 20

4. Whom does the returning officer not mention in 'Election Night Special'? Hint

Johann Gambolputty de von Auschfern ... von Haupkopf of Ulm (Musical party)

John Walter ... Raw Vegetable... Don't Sleep in the Subway... Smith (Silly Party)

Kevin Phillips Bong (Slightly Silly Party)

Tarquin Fin-Tin ... Busstop F'tang F'tang Ole Biscuit Barrel (Silly Party)

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Question 5 of 20

5. Who exploded? Hint

Karl Marx

R.S. Gumby

Mrs Niggerbaiter

Anne Elk

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Question 6 of 20

6. Which of the following would not happen to Dinsdale Pirhana when he felt that Spiny Norman was in the vicinity? Hint

He would become very, very violent

His nose would swell up

He'd put a paper bag over his head

His teeth would move about

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Question 7 of 20

7. A sporting question: which face of which London street would you be likely to climb? Hint

The north face of the Uxbridge Road

The south face of Piccadilly

The east face of Oxford Street

The west face of the King's Road

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Question 8 of 20

8. Who wins the Summarise Proust Competition? Hint

Harry Bagot (last year's semi-finalist from Luton)

The girl with the biggest tits

Ronald Rutherford (from Leicester)

The Bolton Choral Society (all-England finalists from Bingley)

NEXT>

Question 9 of 20

9. Is argument... Hint

Just contradiction

(They never resolve it)

The automatic gainsaying of anything the other person says

An intellectual process

10. 'I've got ninety thousand ____ in my pyjamas. I've got forty thousand ____ in my fridge. I've got lots of lovely ____ now the _____ getting dearer and my ____ would buy the Brooklyn Bridge.' Hint

yen; rands; lire; sterling's; Irish punts

bucks; dollars; yen; pula's; pesetas

pounds; French francs; lire; deutschmark's; dollar bills

lire; pesetas; shekels; franc is; banker's bonds

NEXT>

Question 11 of 20

11. Whom does Pontius Pilate eventually decide to set free? Hint

Brian

Rodney

Roger

Nobody

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Question 12 of 20

12. What is the only thing worse than playing squash together? Hint

Not being talked about

A stream of bat's piss

Playing it by yourself

A dose of the clap

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Question 13 of 20

13. Most of this song from 'Meaning of Life' is far too rude to include in this quiz, but here's a hint: it ends with the phrase 'ehhhh, thank you very much.' Hint

The Willy Song

Not the Noel Coward Song

Elvis - He's Never Coming Back. Get Used To It

The Galaxy Song

NEXT>

Question 14 of 20

14. One of Thomas Hardy's novels was never published. What word does it begin with? Hint

Dolores

But

The definite article

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Question 15 of 20

15. Which radio station exploded? Hint

Radio One

Radio Luxemburg

Radio Two

Radio Four

NEXT>

Question 16 of 20

16. What d'you call that thing what runs the same backwards as forwards? Hint

A pun?

A palindrome?

A parrot?

A petshop?

NEXT>

Question 17 of 20

17. What, as far as we know, doesn't happen at Camelot? Hint

Clark Gable impersonations

Spanking

Footwork impeccable

Push the pram a lot

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Question 18 of 20

18. Your cat is suffering from what we vets... Hint

haven't found a name for

really like to see on a Wednesday

call whooping cough

are susceptible to ourselves: spam-rash

NEXT>

Question 19 of 20

19. What does everyone want to ask Arthur Jackson about instead of 'my bloody music'? Hint

His bloody anorak

His third shed

His nickname, 'Two Sheds'

Sir Edward Ross

NEXT>

Question 20 of 20

20. When you're walking home tonight and some great homicidal maniac comes after you with a bunch of _____, don't come crying to me! Hint

Bananas

Loganberries

Assorted fresh fruit

Passion fruit

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Quiz Answer Key and Fun Facts

1. Who is contesting the North Minehead By-Election?

Answer: Mr Hilter

Heinrich Bimmler: 'I am retired wwwwwwwindow cleaner. And also pacifist. And I vas head of Gestapo for nine years. Nein! Five years! Nein! I was not! I was not head of Gestapo - I make joke...'

2. Which of the following is not engaged in a life-and-death struggle?

Answer: Mr Ford and the City Gent

Mr Ford just wants a charitable donation (one pound for the orphans) from Cleese's Gent, who is having trouble grasping the concept of giving something for nothing:

City Gent: 'I don't want to seem stupid but it looks to me as though I'm a pound down on the whole deal.'
Mr Ford: 'Well, yes, you are.'
City Gent: 'I am! Well, what is my incentive to give you the pound?'
Mr Ford: 'Well, the incentive is - to make the orphans happy.'
City Gent: (genuinely puzzled) 'Happy?... You quite sure you've got this right?'
Mr Ford: 'Yes, lots of people give me money.'
City Gent: 'What, just like that?'
Mr Ford: 'Yes.'
City Gent: 'Must be sick.'

3. 'You can still hear Beethoven, but Beethoven...'

Answer: cannot hear you

'They're decomposing composers, there's less of them every year. You can say what you like to Debussy, but there's not much of him left to hear.'

4. Whom does the returning officer not mention in 'Election Night Special'?

Answer: Johann Gambolputty de von Auschfern ... von Haupkopf of Ulm (Musical party)

No surprises there... 'But why is it that nobody remembers the name of Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern schplenden schlitter crasscrenbon fried digger-dingle-dangle-dongle-dungle burstein von knacker-thrasher apple-banger horowitz ticolensic grander knotty spelltinkle grandlich grumblemeyer spelterwasser kurstlich himbleeisen bahnwagen gutenaben bitte ein nurnburger bratwustle gernspurten mitz weimache luber hundsfut gumberaber shonedanker kalbsfleisch mittler aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm?'

5. Who exploded?

Answer: Mrs Niggerbaiter

'Ooooh, Mrs Niggerbaiter's exploded!' 'Good thing too.' 'Aww, she was my best friend!' 'Oh, Mother, don't be so sentimental. Things explode every day.'

6. Which of the following would not happen to Dinsdale Pirhana when he felt that Spiny Norman was in the vicinity?

Answer: He'd put a paper bag over his head

Dinsdale 'was a cruel man - but fair!' It was the man in the mattress department who put a bag over his head (on audio tape it's a bucket). Always ask to see the dog kennels, or you could wind up singing 'Jerusalem' in the tea chest (or fishtank)!

7. A sporting question: which face of which London street would you be likely to climb?

Answer: The north face of the Uxbridge Road

Piccadilly? Now that would just be silly! It's for amateurs - hardly a road at all. 'Aye, well but they said Crippen was crazy, didn't they?'

8. Who wins the Summarise Proust Competition?

Answer: The girl with the biggest tits

Boy do I hope I'll get away with this one...

9. Is argument...

Answer: (They never resolve it)

Mr Vibrating and Man could go on like this for hours. However, after being accused of not having paid, Man walks out and straight into Complaints, then into being hit on the head lessons ('what a stupid concept!').

10. 'I've got ninety thousand ____ in my pyjamas. I've got forty thousand ____ in my fridge. I've got lots of lovely ____ now the _____ getting dearer and my ____ would buy the Brooklyn Bridge.'

Answer: pounds; French francs; lire; deutschmark's; dollar bills

'There is nothing quite as wonderful as money, there is nothing quite as beautiful as cash...'. Oh, and, 'You can keep your Marxist ways, for it's only just a phase, for it's money, money, money makes the world go round!'

11. Whom does Pontius Pilate eventually decide to set free?

Answer: Brian

At first, Pilate realises he is being made fun of and sulks, refusing to let anyone go. But when the centurion persuades him Brian is a real person, the order is delivered. 'I'm Brian!' 'No, I'm Brian!' 'No, I'm Brian - and so's my wife!' Doesn't help Mr Cohen much, though... 'Fine. Be crucified! See if I care...'

12. What is the only thing worse than playing squash together?

Answer: Playing it by yourself

'I wish I hadn't said that.' ('You did, Oscar, you did.')

13. Most of this song from 'Meaning of Life' is far too rude to include in this quiz, but here's a hint: it ends with the phrase 'ehhhh, thank you very much.'

Answer: Not the Noel Coward Song

'But don't take it out in public or they will stick you in the dock and you won't... a-come... a-back.' I don't believe Coward has been so well parodied, before or since. Note to detractors of this quiz: The song's SUBtitle is "The Penis Song", but its proper name is, indeed, "Not the Noel Coward Song".

14. One of Thomas Hardy's novels was never published. What word does it begin with?

Answer: Dolores

'He's started five of his eleven Wessex novels to date with the definite article. We've had two of them with "It", there's been one "But", two "At", one "On" and a "Dolores" - oh! that, of course, was never published.'

15. Which radio station exploded?

Answer: Radio Four

Then the penguin on top of the television set.

16. What d'you call that thing what runs the same backwards as forwards?

Answer: A palindrome?

'I understand this is Bolton.'
'Yeah?'
'You told me it was Ipswitch.'
'It was a pun.'
'A pun?'
'No, not a pun... What d'you call that thing what runs the same backwards as forwards?'
'A palindrome?'
'Yeah!'
'It's not a palindrome. The palindrome of Bolton would be Notlob...'

17. What, as far as we know, doesn't happen at Camelot?

Answer: Spanking

There seem to be an awful lot of knights there and not many ladies... Perhaps Zoot and Dingo should pay a visit.

18. Your cat is suffering from what we vets...

Answer: haven't found a name for

The remedy? Confuse-a-Cat Ltd., in affiliation with Stun-a-Stoat, Ltd., Distract-a-Bee, Ltd., Puzzle-a-Puma, Ltd. and Bewilderbeest, Ltd.

19. What does everyone want to ask Arthur Jackson about instead of 'my bloody music'?

Answer: His nickname, 'Two Sheds'

Not sure whether Arthur 'Two Sheds' Jackson wears an anorak, but we do understand he used to be interested in train-spotting.

20. When you're walking home tonight and some great homicidal maniac comes after you with a bunch of _____, don't come crying to me!

Answer: Loganberries

Self-defence pupil 1: 'We done the passion fruit.'
SDP2: 'We done oranges, apples, grapefruit...'
SDP3: 'Whole and segments.'
SDP2: 'Pomegranates, greengages...'
SDP1: 'Grapes, passion fruit...'
SDP2: 'Lemons...'
SDP3: 'Plums...'
SDP1: 'Mangoes in syrup...'
Sgt.: 'How about cherries?'
All: 'We did them.'
Sgt.: 'Red *and* black?'
All: 'Yes!'
Sgt.: 'All right, bananas.'

All quotes cited in this quiz are taken from memory. Could anyone recommend a good milkman (or psychiatrist, for that matter)? If I have made any mistakes, and you've actually spotted them, that makes you even sadder than me. Do please let me know. I could do with a good laugh!

Source: Author alkmene

This quiz was reviewed by FunTrivia editor ladymacb29 before going online.
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