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#1006632 - Mon Aug 26 2013 09:49 AM Great Grocho Marx One Liners
vendome Offline

Registered: Sun May 21 2000
Posts: 1778
Loc: Body: PA USA Heart: Paris   
I would never belong to a club that would have me as a member.

Those are my principles. If you don't like them, I have others.

I never forget a face, but in your case, I'll be glad to make an exception.

Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?

She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.

I intend to live forever, or die trying.

Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.

A man's only as old as the woman he feels.

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course.

Edited by vendome (Mon Aug 26 2013 09:55 AM)
I'm not going to buy my kids an encyclopedia. Let them walk to school like I did.
Yogi Berra

#1007246 - Wed Aug 28 2013 10:50 AM Re: Great Grocho Marx One Liners
JanIQ Offline

Registered: Thu Jul 09 2009
Posts: 875
Loc: Antwerp
Mae West and Groucho Marx apparently shared views on marriage.
I dreamt of spending a day riding a stallion. It was a nightmare.

#1031532 - Fri Jan 24 2014 05:50 PM Re: Great Grocho Marx One Liners
tjoebigham Offline

Registered: Sat Dec 25 1999
Posts: 2824
Loc: Fairhaven Massachusetts USA   
My favorite Groucho one-liner:

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.


#1031534 - Fri Jan 24 2014 06:04 PM Re: Great Grocho Marx One Liners
sb22705 Offline

Registered: Tue Oct 16 2012
Posts: 41
Loc: Colorado USA
A couple of more:
If women dressed for men, the stores wouldn't sell much -- just an occasional sun visor.
Money frees you from doing things you dislike - since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy.

#1033357 - Fri Feb 07 2014 01:23 PM Re: Great Grocho Marx One Liners
paul4760 Offline

Registered: Sun Mar 10 2013
Posts: 43
Loc: Iowa USA
"Send two dozen roses to Room 424 and put 'Emily I love you' on the back of the bill".
"Do what you want to the girl, but leave me alone!" George Carlin

#1033364 - Fri Feb 07 2014 04:05 PM Re: Great Grocho Marx One Liners
george48 Offline

Registered: Wed Jul 01 2009
Posts: 334
Loc: Ottawa
  Ontario Canada   
Yesterday, i shot an elephant in my pajamas, how he got in my pajamas i'll never know.


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