Oh yeah, and another of my favourites:

“The Deliverator belongs to an elite order, a hallowed subcategory. He's got esprit up to here. Right now, he is preparing to carry out his third mission of the night. His uniform is black as activated charcoal, filtering the very light out of the air. A bullet will bounce off its arachnofiber weave like a wren hitting a patio door, but excess perspiration wafts through it like a breeze through a freshly napalmed forest, Where his body has bony extremities, the suit has sintered armorgel: feels like gritty jello, protects like a stack of telephone books.” - Snow Crash, Neal Stephenson

That quote is only funny after you read on and realise they're talking about a pizza delivery guy (the deliverator)

One of mine favourites is :
"Good Dog Nigel

Arf, Arf, he goes, a merry sight
Our little hairy friend
Arf, Arf, upon the lampost bright
Arfing round the bend.
Nice dog! Goo boy,
Waggie tail and beg,
Clever Nigel, jump for joy
Because we are putting you to sleep at three of the clock, Nigel."

I don't mean to make this a different type of thread, but does anyone know what book this is from? (and no Coolup, it's not "The Bible")

Eraserhead, you brought some other strange but memorable opening lines to mind.

A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man by James Joyce:
"Once upon a time and a very good time it was there was a moocow coming down along the road and this moocow that was coming down the road met a nicens little boy named baby tuckoo."

The Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka:
"As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from uneasy dreams, he found himself transformed into a monstrous vermin."

After reading these novels, I definitely remembered their opening lines!

I'll confirm that, TabbyTom. I used to have a copy, and knew almost all of it by heart. I wish I knew where it was now, though. Lost it in one of my several moves. It'd probably be worth a fortune on ebay.

Absolutely correct, Tabby and Maggie. I spent many hours chuckling while reading and re-reading his tales of Liddypool, Dr. Whooper and others. Littlewoman, openings like that pique my curiosity enough to want to read further!

"Morgan was surprised to find that one of the houses moving towards him was still occupied"

"Land's End" by Leanne Frahm.

I was given a book called "Alien Shores", a showcase of Aussie sci fi writers. In my opinion, a darn good opening

"In the name of God, the Compassionate, the Merciful.

Praise be to God, Lord of the Universe,
The Compassionate, the Merciful,
Sovereign of the Day of Judgement!
You alone we worship, and to you alone we turn for help.
Guide us to the straight path,
The path of those whom you have favoured,
Not of those who have incurred your wrath,
Nor of those who have gone astray"
(English translation)

It has to be "The Quran" for me.