I'm really not trying to be controversial, just (as always) curious. Every now and then we have someone who gives us a grand introduction in the welcome centre, such as good old Ron Price, which in my case always raises my interest level as I like to know details, and then they seem to have been blown out of steam and rarely last more than a few weeks. There are a number of similar examples, and each raises my hopes we've got a fascinating new member, only to see them disappear into the ether soon afterwards. I just wonder anyone's theories what starts off as such a good beginning (though I know some people think it's too much detail I love it!) and then peters out nine times out of ten, and since it's become an actual phenomenon I was just wondering other opinions on it.
I personally was so darn lazy when I arrived here I aimed for the areas I wanted to see directly and somehow overlooked the welcome centre simply by having a narrow focus, despite dropping in fairly regularly for a few years. I suppose people can be divided (we have discussed this before) into sharers and 'keepers', and you all know which I am ( ), but as one myself and knowing how similar people like to stick together, can see how I feel let down when some of the more, shall I say, unusual characters breeze in and out so quickly before we can really get to know them properly. So Ron, if you're reading this, out of your shell and say something, I miss reading you!

Hmmmm, seems this guy Mister Price, lives in my neck of the woods.....Interesting.

I will add before I retire that I only referred to people who literally came and went, ie never posted again. That was the pattern I spotted, otherwise the theory doesn't apply. Literally all or nothing, no in between.

But I do find people's life histories fascinating, as they are all so different from each other and unique. I will now also admit to asking opinions about a life history thread, but the 'noes' won that day. I'd still love to see one though, humans on the whole are a nosy bunch, which is why we learn so much.

We will attempt to ignore the negative, chilly winds currently blowing and explore this very interesting idea. In fact - it's a terrific subject for a thread and one I have discussed privately with several people around here from time to time.

As for myself, I don't imagine anyone could acuse me of 'having no life'! Not with a small business, a Brownie troop and three ridiculously active children. Plus this ancient house, in which big hunks of something are usually falling off, in need of replacement or repair.



I too have noticed a pattern in the new arrivals. Many times [ not always, lest we stir the naysayers out of their beds] the more gladhanding there is and the more 'cigars' a newbie hands out, the shorter the duration of their stay. Obviously, I won't mention names, but I'm sure you can all come up with a few. The proverbial flash in the pan. One, two or twenty three posts later and they either slowly, quietly fade into oblivion or go out with guns blazing, angry at some trivial comment everybody else seems to be taking in stride. Hard to tell what makes people act the way they do on line...and I can't guess, because people have so many reasons for being here. Loneliness, love of knowledge, a need to express themselves, to make a particular kind of friend with the same interests...the list goes on and on.

In the beginning, I was new to the internet and merely wanted to meet other people who loved books, had done some writing and had different interests than many of the people I have around me in real life. I missed my old hometown and thought joining FT would help me cope with the move.

What I found was so much more than what I bargained for. I have made friends here, who care whether I show up or not, check on me when I'm absent for too long. Friends who are smart, funny and warm hearted. I even feel a certain tenderness for the rabble rousers around the place -it wouldn't be the same without them, either. I'm very happy to be here, all in all.

And by the way, I think a personal history thread is a good idea, too.

Sometimes I think people either just get bored with a particular forum after a few posts, or in the case of "one-post wonders" don't get the answers they expect or want after their initial post so they just don't bother to come back. I know I have drifted away from quite a few places that I was enamoured with for awhile and then just tired of for one reason or other.

Also,I might add that I know that there are some of us who are much better at lurking than posting--I don't post often, but I'm on-site several times a day. I enjoy reading everyone else's posts, but I rarely have time to answer all the ones I'd like to. Sometimes I wish I could just plug my brain in instead of the keyboard and dictate.

This WILL be cynical, I realise, but there are people who post about themselves, their own achievements and interests and post not ever again because they are not really interested in hearing about other people, their achievements and interests. Prove me wrong Mr Price...

I think people may sometimes be put off by reading aggressive posts, not necessarily against themselves. Some threads develop from an innocent off-hand comment into a full scale row unrelated to the original theme. I've experienced this on several occasions, and have deliberately stayed out of those threads which have 'lost their way' in this manner.
New posters may read such aggressive comments, and decide that it's easier to simply avoid posting.
Sometimes there may be unwillingness to give personal details, or regret having done so, as this might appear as boasting. At worst these may even result in offensive private messages, which the recepient may choose to ignore rather than report, but decide not to bother making further postings.

My own view is that some people simply wish to not chat about the topics presented.

This chat forum is an extension of Funtrivia and as such Terry has decided that keeping things [mostly] "light" here is more in keeping with the goals of the main area. Some people prefer to discuss "heavier" topics and have no interest in posting here.

I think that it`s hard for to people to post in a chat site where others know each other fairly well, it could perhaps be similar to joining in a discussion at a party where you know no-one.

I believe that there are others that have points of view that they strongly believe in or wish to promote and when their points are found to be less than factual and people comment on that the new person simply moves onto a different site.

One last thought I have had on this topic is the fact that a small number of new people don`t post in a manner that people here feel comfortable with and cause either annoyance or grief to "established" posters and when they are "chastised" become disillusioned and leave, or stay and change the way they present their thoughts.

And occasionally you get someone who lurks for a while and then comes roaring in, steel-capped boots and all, who stays!

As a relative newbie (though I now think of myself as very much at home here) I had not experienced Mr Price before (and it is an experience!). I must admit I don't tend to look at the 'welcome' forum, but after that maybe I will now...

I have to say it took even a shy retiring person like me a little while to feel my way in, so to speak. Certainly the people here are much more welcoming and accepting than other sites I have visited, and while it is obvious that some people know each other better than others, there is no sense of 'clique' mentality, or it being in any way a 'closed circle'. I think one of the mistakes some people make when joining forums/chat rooms is that they force the issue and don't let relationships form naturally over time (but then quite possibly this is the way they approach all their relationships...)

Then there's the other possibility that someone who makes a stunning entrance simply has nothing else to say. Not necessarily in the way that Ren mentions above (though of course talking about yourself and not wanting to listen is all too common), but possibly they've put so much into that one statement they have nothing left! I can't offer any examples - obviously it doesn't appear to be the case with our friend Mr Price - but it can be an issue.

I don't have a problem with a CV thread, and would probably contribute to one, but I don't really see that kind of list as particularly revealing in and of itself. Again to use Mr Price as the example at hand, I find the fact that he decided to put up that post in this context much more interesting than what was actually in it.

Um, has the thought entered anyones mind that it's possible this person may have passed away?

Unlikely, but still possible.

If anyone is interested the following are just some of the sites that Ron has been mentioned in or posted in, mostly for his poetry. RP1 RP2 RP3

I realize that I am even newer than ing (on this side of the site), but I have been around the Forums for a while now, and I do not remember this Ron Price. How long has it been since he's been heard from?
Why do people drift away? Change is my best guess. A few years ago I belonged to a game site that had great games, live chatting in between and chat boards as well.
It took up a great deal of my time. They underwent a huge renovation which necessitated downloading all kinds of new programs in order to still be able to play. Between the fact that I was spending too much time on the site (you could play these games for hours on end as a new one appeared every 2 minutes or so), and the fact that my computer at the time was quite old and all the new downloads might have affrected performance, I chose to step away.
Fun Trivia has nicely filled the gap for me, with a format that allows less frantic involvment. The contest games don't appear every 2 minutes, and the online quizzes are there to play at my leisure. Plus, I can pop in and out of the forums as I please. With them not being live chat boards, I don't hurt anyone's feelings if I leave a chat room to take care of business.
It's a great site that meets my needs, but might not be what everyone is looking for.

Having checked the site logs, Ron Price registerd on 29th September and last visited the site (logged on) on 1st October. If he has been here since then he has been lurking.

As the administrator who normally accepts new registrations for the forums, I am frequently puzzled as to why many people register, they never make even one post. If they only want to lurk they can do so without registering. The only thing that I can think of is that they expect instant access, rather than the registration process which can take from minutes to hours, depending on whether I am here and have noticed them registering. When it isn't instant they just don't bother to come back and post.

Some people just register in order to post a question in Feedback or Ask The Quiz Editors.

I suppose there are also people who mistakenly believe they must register in order to read the forums, not realising that they can merely 'lurk'. There is after all a lot of useful advice to be had, and there's nothing wrong with reading it without commenting.

Yes, Aramis, you're probably right about that. Some do register sort of 'by mistake'.

There's nothing inherently evil about 'lurking' in itself. Probably everybody does it to an extent.I sometimes want to just see what's been going on in my absence, but don't have time to post anything.

When I'm really tired and don't feel like thinking hard enough to post or reply to a topic meant for discussion, the chains allow me to go on auto pilot for a while.
The chains are always handy for the purpose of either waking up or unwinding after a long day. They range in requirement from brief, clinical answers to replies which require some thought and personal interaction.' Laid back' in concept but also as intense as one wants to make them. Something for everybody.

I did my fair share of lurking before joining the forums. The main reason was not having a acceptable e-mail address (like no yahoo and hotmail addresses)but when I got Internet at home, I joined, I thought I'd only be here maybe once a week I was a bit wrong!

At this moment in time there are just 9 registered users and 24 'lurkers' or people who haven't registered/logged in.

As for not having an acceptable email address in order to join the forums, people with difficulties can always contact me by email and I will assist in anyway that I can.

I'm reading all this with interest (and have no cause to really differ with any of it, I might add) but it seems to circle around the reasons folks visit or stay or lurk or pontificate or giggle. All of it. Thus, on some level, that assigns a motive instead of just a reason to stop in. Let's liken it to accepting an invitation to a party. If a person goes to this bash expecting to be socially validated, hook up romantically, get wasted, cause trouble, clown around [whatever their goal is] and don't find it then it's a "bad party" and they won't go to the next one. Of course it wasn't a bad party overall. It was just the wrong party for the person in question who expected more from it than maybe someone else did. No harm done in the big picture of things if that party attendee stays home next time.

It's funny that Mr. Price came up since I was talking with someone about a similiar case on the phone shortly ago...that older fellow who was an extra in films. Interesting guy who came in quite actively and disappeared just as quick. What happened to him? Who knows, really. I remember him since he sounded interesting to me but he was just one of a herd of names who come and go at a dizzying rate.

I have this reigning theory about this online regimen (valid or not): there is a massive number of people who have a "vending machine" notion about it. It's a mechanical device, put in your quarter, pick something, take it and go about your business. This easily explains why some enter and communicate using language and symbols that make sense only to them. Sometimes people are just crabby and want to kick up some dust and anywhere will do. It's just a contraption, after all. Those people are easy to spot as a general rule. Placing personal expectations (at least in terms of getting some sort of emotional fulfillment) at the mercy of what you think is a mechanical place is self-defeating. There's that expectation word again, the beast . This is not to say that the opportunity to find more than you ever imagined is not there; it's a discovery, though, not a directive. I don't know anything about the poet or the actor but, in my simple little corner, I just hoped that one was off writing something spectacular and that the other was on location.

I'll close this gasbag of a thing with that I, too, have reasons/motives for being here. Mine are mostly about filling up time and having something to do. If, though, that all changed and I left I hope it wouldn't be deemed more or less important than just that. Something else came up. But, then, I'm the type who doesn't think that if a person has a bad time at my real life party it is because they hated the spinach dip, party conversation or overall ambience of the mix, etc. Unless, of course, I was throwing the party specifically for them (and even then I wouldn't lose any sleep over it). If that makes any sense...