For Christmas I gave a close female friend of mine a very nice (I thought they were nice)set of matched jewelery from the watch to the earrings, a necklace and bracelet.

It wasn't a expensive gift but I thought she would like it.
Well I discovered today that,in her own words" OH I gave that away as I don't wear that kind of stuff".It was the tone of her voice that implied she thought it was junk and beneath her to wear it.

Grant you it wasn't gold or even real silver jewelery but my feelings were hurt.I didn't say anything to her but I am upset and not sure what to say.

What would you said to her if it had of been you.
I will get over it but right now I am hurting.

I shall be giving her gift certificates in the future so she can get what she wants and that will save me from anymore hurt feelings.
PF

This friend sounds very shallow to me PurpleFan ( sorry)
I would remind her that it is the thought that counts and that your gift was given with love. Let her know that you are hurt by her treatment of your gift and you would rather not exchange gifts next Christmas. (Sounds harsh, I know but that's what I would say.)
Chin up PurpleFan what goes around comes around...........

Well sometimes I may recieve a present or two which isn't quite to my taste, but I always thank the person who gives them the present (and hopefully show apprecation ). Sometimes people can't be pleased

I know what I would do. I wouldn't say anything, and next Christmas when she didn't get anything from me, and she questions why, then I'd tell her.

Doing it that way will make her feel like horse manure.

Well I don't know who that was and that is downright nasty - is she REALLY a good friend? If it anything like the set the postman brought me today then it is lovely and she ought to have been very pleased.

If I were you I wouldn't buy her anything next year.

I guess it depends on how close you are with this friend. One of my best friends is a little, shall we say, fashion forward. We've been friends for half my life, and she's also good friends with my little sis. She calls my parents Mom and Dad and has even lived with them for a year, and she spends holidays with us when she's in town. We love her. In the same way that you can love a family member because they are family who sometimes you don't want anything to do with because they can be real snots. She's a little shallow when it comes to her wardrobe and accessories and this is something we all know about her.

So, over the years, I have made her jewelry for a number of occasions. Most in sterling silver, once a gold and diamond stud earring. And she has never worn a single piece of it except the diamond stud. It always hurt my feelings a little, but even though I THOUGHT I had matched her style at the time, I obviously hadn't. It's just something I know about her, and I love her anyway, so I have never said anything except to gently tease her for never liking my gifts, too which she always gently teases back that they are lovely, just not for her.

Finally, this year I gave her two necklaces for her birthday that she adores. She wears them all the time and says she gets tons of compliments on them, and she wants me to send her some more items for her to sell because her friends always ask her where she got them.

But anyway, like I said, I guess it depends on how well you know them. Snowy can realy upset me sometimes. And she can be hurtful without realizing it. But we know her well enough to let it roll off our shoulders. We love her despite it, and we usually know what to expect. So what we might say to her is probably different than if you were not a close friend of the person.

For the latter, I confess that I don't give gifts to very many people I don't know quite well. But for me, I think I'd tell her that I'd have liked to know that when I gave her the gift, not some time later after she had already given it away. This is partly because then I might know better what kind of gifts she likes, even if I might not give her another soon.

PF I think your friend handled this very poorly, but do have to ask if there is more than just taste involved here.
I can only wear jewelry that is gold or silver, anything else (even the 'hypo-allergenic, surgical steel' stuff) gives me a rash. I have told my mother-in-law this a number of times, but she never manages to remember, and is often giving me earrings that I simply can't wear. When she gives them to me, I never know whether to remind her or not.
Could it be something like this? If so she certainly should have said something.
My brother has never been shy of asking for the receipt and returning something if he doesn't like it. His attitude has always been one of appreciating the thought that went into the gift, but not understanding why it should sit on a shelf and collect dust when someone paid good money for it. I suppose there's someting to be said for that.
He's usually very nice about it too, and not dismissive like your firend was.

Thank you all for your kind words.They made me feel better.

Yes Sue it was identical to the one you got even to the color.

I have decided not to say anything but she will get a card and a gift certificate from now on.

I guess we learn lessons in life from things that happen and I have learnt that not all people have the same tastes as I do.

I am sure whoever she gave the set to will like it so I guess I pleased a stranger.

PF
Edited to correct spelling mistake.