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#326822 - Wed Oct 18 2006 05:34 AM What makes your friend's so special?
nic1990 Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: Thu Sep 07 2006
Posts: 412
Loc: South Australia
Ok, i was on the phone earlier to my best friend, and it made me think about what a special friend she is. She has helped me through some of my darker teenage years, and has never complained that i was to needy or clingy.

So i ask the question to the rest of you... Besides the fact that they're always there for you, what makes your friend/s so special? Have they helped you through a rough patch, or supported you through a death, financial loss etc.

Also, what makes the friends you have made here on F.T and in the Forums so special? Is it Sue's random photos or how Jane has inspired you to loose weight!

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#326823 - Wed Oct 18 2006 06:19 AM Re: What makes your friend's so special?
Copago Offline
Moderator

Registered: Tue May 15 2001
Posts: 14384
Loc: Australia
My best friend is special because she offered to be at the birth of my son when my partner couldn't be there. I didn't take her up on the offer but the fact she made it, and wanted to be there, meant a lot to me. She lives a long way away and we seldom talk much (kids and life and all that) but I know there's always a bed at her place for me and a bottle of wine if I turned up un-announced.

The motley crew here at FT? I'm still here after five years so there must be something about them! I don't chat to many people in email or PM but I would still call many people here friends. I've been lucky enough to meet a fair few in the flesh which has made it seem even more real.

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#326824 - Wed Oct 18 2006 06:55 AM Re: What makes your friends so special?
sue943 Offline
Administrator

Registered: Sun Dec 19 1999
Posts: 37384
Loc: Jersey
Channel Islands    
I have to write about my friends here at Funtrivia. Without all their support getting through my illness last year would have been so difficult. They were there all along the way posting messages of support and good wishes in this forum, they phoned me in hospital, sent me cards, flowers and gifts. I was, and still am, overwhelmed at the kindness shown to me by my Funtrivia friends.

The staff at the hospital didn't know where my telephone calls were coming from next, they came from (going east to west) Australia, Hong Kong (couldn't get the old bat off the phone, she kept on calling!), England, New York, Houston and last, but certainly not least, Vancouver.

My 'real life' friends have also been tremendous. A huge special mention goes to Marianne, someone whom I have known for many years but we don't live in each other's pockets. She was, and is tremendous. Not only coming to my aid when I was taken ill at home, but in looking after my pets and checking mail, paying bills etc for months, and still looking after my cat now when I am away from home. I have a number of friends who would drop everything and come to do whatever I need - but I am very independent so hate asking for help.

Former colleagues were also great although mostly we have lost contact now, but when times were difficult they were there, one driving me when I couldn't drive, another doing my laundry when I was in hospital.

With my local friends and my Funtrivia friends, I feel well blessed. I am a lucky woman.


Edited by sue943 (Wed Oct 18 2006 06:56 AM)
_________________________
Many a child has been spoiled because you can't spank a Grandma!

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#326825 - Wed Oct 18 2006 07:19 AM Re: What makes your friends so special?
ren33 Offline
Moderator

Registered: Thu Sep 30 1999
Posts: 12427
Loc: Kowloon Tong  Hong Kong      
Oh Sue, that's so nice to hear. Had you ever thought why it is that people care about you and want to help? Maybe because you care about them and help them in times of trouble. (No one would care about you if they realised what an ornery old bat you really are. Believe me folks, I have stayed at her place (twice ) and I know.)
Actually (to be honest)she is a thoroughly 'good sort' I would come across many, many instances of thoughtfulness,while staying 'chez Sue". I would happen to mention I liked some food item , or a perfume. It was there.I had a great time.
Thanks pal.
I have two or three very special mates here.
One in particular I have to single out (otherwise she would duff me up) is a certain little purple-mad person, who lives in Western Canada, near the 'big lake'(in-joke,that is). I have stayed with her and her bloke (BH) twice too. I had a blast. Another generous- to- a- fault friend , I tell you. I could write a book about all the wonderful things they did for me.
Then there are the mates who listen to my moans, help me out with their quizzes in the games forum, and generally put up with me. There is TW who comes to my rescue every time I show what a klutz I am with PC's.George who also sorts out my moans. There are several who just make me laugh , which is a heck of an achievement when I am feeling miserable. There is one very, very special guy here, who I think, makes everyone feel special. He does a lot for me, I tell you . He lives in Ohio. Nuff said.
Those are the FT friends.
I have others I work with . One I only see when I go back to UK. She I have known for 55 years and we just laugh hysterically when we meet. She is great and keeps me sane too. ( a near impossible feat at times.)
Thanks to all the nice people here who PM me and email me and are generally supportive. We really breed "good eggs" here, don't we?
_________________________
Wandering aimlessly through FT since 1999.

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#326826 - Wed Oct 18 2006 07:36 AM Re: What makes your friends so special?
Gatsby722 Offline
Pure Diamond

Registered: Fri May 18 2001
Posts: 123698
Loc: Canton
Ohio USA    
I'm not sure if I'm the right one to ask on this one . I'm such a blabbermouth when it comes to certain things and this topic is one of them.

The bulk of my "3-D"/real life friends I have had since high school or college. This is a mighty long time, rest assured, but we're all still such excellent friends. The dynamics have changed a great deal - distances, families, decades of time, many of us hardly ever see each other anymore but we talk, we're in touch, we're there for each other. I was thinking about this the other night ~ it used to be we'd all at least see each other on holidays, no matter where we were living or working. Our families (notably parents) were from around here and we'd all come home. That has changed, of course. Almost all of our parents have passed away so now 'we're'/'they're' the ones THEIR kids come home to see on special events. Home then has splintered off into many places for sure. But, as Copago mentioned, if it's been a year or if it's been 10 of 'em we keep our doors open to each other at all times. 2006 is no different, in spirit and in potence, than 1977 was and friends (at least mine) don't let details like regular visits or lack of them interrupt our history together. I think that defines a friend. Sometimes I worship the distance these days, I must say. Those folks who like to still remember me going on like a wild monkey on the dance floor or playing tennis tirelessly for hours on end have a certain level of discomfort, at least at first, with my circumstances now. But, even at that, it's awkward for a minute and soon it's gotten over and we just stop wasting time focusing on their ballooning bellies, suddenly conservative shirts or my marginal legs. Some days I'd like them all to be back in the same state as I am again but most days I know that where we all are doesn't weaken or change anything.

Now for this FT pack of rascals. This I can LITERALLY say, from my own experience. A better group of minds, intent, differences, sincerities and clarity I had never thought possible to find and build on when I arrived here some years ago. What a great stroke of luck for this old goat! Not a year ago I was offline for a while and my thoughts landed daily (hourly) on all my exceptional friends here while I was gone. The cards and letters were better than a miracle to me. I felt connected to so many people that, while I've never shook hands or heartily hugged a one of them, are so familiar and completely special to me that I have to think about how it happened sometimes. This community has, and I'm not exaggerating, been responsible for keeping me alive on occasion. No one donated a kidney or dashed over on a horse to rescue me. Nope. They did better than that. They cared and meant it. It never occurred to me to start about making a whole new city of friends at my age when I found this site. Imagine that I made a whole planet of them!? Lucky? Blessed? Both times ten.

See what I mean about being a "blabbermouth" ?
_________________________
"The best teacher is not the one who knows most but the one who is most capable of reducing knowledge to that simple compound of the obvious and wonderful." ... H. L. Mencken


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#326827 - Wed Oct 18 2006 08:16 AM Re: What makes your friends so special?
sue943 Offline
Administrator

Registered: Sun Dec 19 1999
Posts: 37384
Loc: Jersey
Channel Islands    
And you Gatsby are more than a friend, you are my inspiration.
_________________________
Many a child has been spoiled because you can't spank a Grandma!

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#326828 - Wed Oct 18 2006 09:27 AM Re: What makes your friends so special? *DELETED*
denni19 Offline


Registered: Tue Sep 05 2006
Posts: 14562
Loc: Bucharest Romania
Post deleted by denni19
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"The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn." - David Russell

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#326829 - Wed Oct 18 2006 09:59 AM Re: What makes your friends so special?
JaneMarple Offline
Star Poster

Registered: Fri Jan 30 2004
Posts: 14480
Loc: North West of England
I can honestly say that I've made more Friends on the three years (give or take a few months) on the forum than I thought I'd ever make on the Internet Every single one of you, from our newest member to the person who began it, I consider friends You've helped me a lot, and I also learn things in this forum too!
I think though, if I had to choose one 'real life friend' there'd be no contest....Mum! Closely followed by my sister and her family of course.
_________________________
My mind is like a parachute...it functions only when open.

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#326830 - Wed Oct 18 2006 12:38 PM Re: What makes your friends so special?
PurpleFan Offline
Multiloquent

Registered: Fri Oct 22 1999
Posts: 2249
Loc: New Westminster BC Canada
Oh Sara and Sue how sweet of you to say those nice things .Back at you double.

We became friends in here and even though there is distance between us the bonds of friendship have become stronger every year.

Sara it was so much fun having you visit and we hope you will come back again soon.We still have so much to show you yet.Maybe take you across Canada to Thunder Bay and Back.
The Pacific Lake is here waiting for you.As are the R.C.M.P.

Sue I would have called you more but you were on the mend and going home soon.But I did write a Thank You note to all the Nurses and Doctors who took such good care of you for us.

I have also gotten to know a few others in here who prefer to remain anonymous but are dear to my heart also and are a part of the FF(In Joke) and one in particular I share a same day Birthday with. My Birthday Sister Friend.

A few others have made me cry laughing and never fail to make me smile when they post.I hope they know what special people they are also.I hope I have thanked them in a PM so they know they brighten up my day.

Who knew that my love of trivia would bring me such rewards as I have gotten here.
Thank You Terry.
PF
_________________________
All Things Purple Are Relative!

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#326831 - Wed Oct 18 2006 12:49 PM Re: What makes your friends so special?
JaneMarple Offline
Star Poster

Registered: Fri Jan 30 2004
Posts: 14480
Loc: North West of England
I've also forgot to mention my best "Jigsaw Friend". I was searching for a particular jigsaw for several years - a Christmas Jigsaw. I joined a Jigsaw website, and made some new friends. But one lady in particular seemed to "click" immediately, and eventually we swapped e-mail addresses. We e-mail each other daily. She is in England, but I've never met. One day maybe
_________________________
My mind is like a parachute...it functions only when open.

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#326832 - Wed Oct 18 2006 05:24 PM Re: What makes your friends so special?
satguru Offline
Forum Champion

Registered: Thu Feb 17 2000
Posts: 7643
Loc: Kingsbury London UK           
It's really feeling comfortable with someone, and this can happen after a day and last a lifetime, however often or rarely you see someone. Most of my friends were from my teens and earlier, though they have all dispersed either abroad (includes 'south of the river...') or towards family life where my single life makes them feel funny to have me around. Like when they had girlfriends years ago most cut their friends out but a few (including me) kept in touch with both. Girlfriends tend to last months at best, friends most of your life. The same ones were the same when they got married, all or nothing.

On FT it is quite different. Like many, having proved a friendship online reflects an equal friendship face to face, the distance is all that stops me being part of a huge new community right here. And because we all have an interest in the little details of life we have something in common from the start, plus we all like sharing details of our life and hearing about others. Every so often I spot someone who fits with me, and it rarely happens face to face, but every week or so here. We have gravitated to the same place from all over the world. I see people like myself here as often as I see those unlike me everywhere else. You may not necessarily take that as a compliment but I do. I'm now waiting for Woody Allen to join. Some people say I already have...
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Does the brain create or receive consciousness?

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#326833 - Wed Oct 18 2006 06:55 PM Re: What makes your friends so special?
MotherGoose Offline
Multiloquent

Registered: Mon Apr 22 2002
Posts: 4851
Loc: Western Australia
Hmmm, what can I say that hasn't already been said?

My FunTrivia "family" is very important to me and luckily my real family at home understands and supports this. I use the word family, rather than friends, because quite a number of you are like family to me.

I've been fortunate enough to meet a couple of FT people (Auszev and Nannanut) and talked on the phone to quite a few (especially Gats) and can honestly say I've not been disappointed. In other words, the friendship that appeared to be there in those first online communications proved well-founded upon subsequent "real" communication. And I think I am really lucky.

The West Australians who participate in the Regional Tournament are having a get together soon and I can't wait to meet them all.
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Don't say "I can't" ... say " I haven't learned how, yet." (Reg Bolton)

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#326834 - Wed Oct 18 2006 10:22 PM Re: What makes your friends so special?
lothruin Offline
Multiloquent

Registered: Wed Nov 12 2003
Posts: 2165
Loc: Nebraska USA
What can I say, I don't want to gush. I love you all here. There have been a few bad apples over the years since I joined, and they've come and gone, and never managed to spoil the bunch. Harkening back to the days of CI (I know I shouldn't...) there are those with whom I disagreed, often strongly, but the environment fostered at FT provided a place where we could disagree even on a fundamental level about a great variety of important issues, and still become close, respecting rather than reviling those differences. Everyone here seems to have that same attitude of mutual respect and it's really very comforting.

And that's it, in a nutshell. That there is a common bond of respect for each other that transcends. Perhaps I've never said it before to most of you, perhaps I should have... A person simply can't interact in such a nurturing environment, daily reading glimpses into the personal foibles and desires and interests of such a vastly entertaining group of people, without being drawn in. And all there is to do is say thank you.

Oh darn it, I gushed. Well, I'm going to gush some more... what makes my best friend special? When I was 5 years old, and was the new girl a month into classes, younger than my classmates and shy, a dark-haired little girl sat next to me that first day and played. We learned to ride our bikes together, we let our imaginations run wild together, we shared books, we shared secrets. I was there when her parents split up. She was there when I moved to a new school district right before junior high. She was there when my dad lost his job, and when my mother and I were in a car accident. I was there when her sister ran away. We cried over our first loves together. A few months ago, I cried tears of joy with her when I was the first person she told that she was pregnant. She is a sister of my heart, and she's been my best friend for 25 years. She's special because I would not be me without her.


Edited by Lothruin (Wed Oct 18 2006 10:24 PM)
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Goodbye Ruth & Betty, my beautiful grandmothers.
Betty Kuzara 1921 - April 5, 2008
Ruth Kellison 1925 - Dec 27, 2007

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