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I've noticed a trend at American colleges that Dov touched upon. I think it's when the men in particular live in dormitories, or houses or apts, and barely take care of their own messes. Perhaps they've been taken care of at home by their mothers. When I visited my daughter at the dorms, she was ok, but, clearly unhappy about the lack of choice with whom she lived with, the steep price, and above all, having to go eat food that she didn't care for in a separate place. Although she could have cooking facilities in the dorms, it just wasn't like a home to her.

She's so much happier in an apt with roommates of her choosing and learning to cook for them and herself. She works, studies hard and dances a lot and that's the way she wants it.

She told me, and I used to see it myself in some of the colleges I taught in, that many of the students had had everything done for them, and that wanted this state to continue.

I think I'm the proudest about how she's taking care of paperwork because she's had several jobs and now is doing bills and financial aid for school mostly on her own.

Now, I did say I see a lot of young men who tended to be a little more dependent on their families, but I need to qualify that. I think it's a tendency of some parents to not expect the same things from their boys. It's a young woman who told me how men her own age seemed hopeless as few of them had to work, their mothers cleaned up after them and gave them cars and money, and frankly dating them seemed like you were going to take over all that work from their mothers. She was twenty-five then.
She'd been working since she was very young and going to school like many American kids, so, I guess she saw many of the young men as lazy and not terribly ambitious.

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