Terms of Use

Topic Options
#47821 - Tue Aug 07 2001 03:07 PM Letter to America
LordAndry Offline

Registered: Mon Jun 25 2001
Posts: 2542
Loc: Los Angeles
California USA
America has engaged in some finger wagging lately because California doesn't have enough electricity to meet its needs. The rest of the country (including George W. Bush's energy secretary Spencer Abraham, who wants Californians to suffer through blackouts as justification for drilling for oil in Alaska's Arctic National Wildlife Refuge) seems to be just fine with letting Californians dangle in the breeze without enough power to meet their needs. They laugh at Californians' frivolity.

Well, everybody. Here's how it really is:

California ranks 48th in the nation in power consumed per person. California grows more than half the nation's fruit, nuts and vegetables. We're keeping them. We need something to eat when the power goes out.

We grow 99 percent or more of the nation's almonds, artichokes, dates, figs, kiwifruit, olives, persimmons, pistachios, prunes, raisins and walnuts. Hope you won't miss them.

California is the nation's number one dairy state. We're keeping our dairy products. We'll need plenty of fresh ones since our refrigerators can't be relied upon. Got milk?

We Californians are going to keep all our high-tech software in state. Silicon Valley is ours, after all. Without enough electricity, which you're apparently keeping for yourselves, we just don't have enough software to spare.

We're keeping all our airplanes. California builds a good percentage of the commercial airliners available to fly you people to where you want to go. When yours wear out, you'd better hope Boeing's Washington plant can keep you supplied. There isn't enough electricity here to allow us to export any more planes than we need ourselves.

Oh, yeah, and if you want to make a long-distance call, remember where the satellite components and tracking systems come from. Maybe you could get back in the habit of writing letters.

Want to see a movie this weekend? Come to California. We make them here. Since we'll now have to make them with our own electricity, we're keeping them. Even if we shot them somewhere else, the labs, printing facilities, editing facilities, and sound facilities are all here.

Want some nice domestic wine? We produce over 17 million gallons per year. We'll need all of it to drown our sorrows when we think about the fact that no matter how many California products we export to make the rest of America's lives better, America can't seem to help us out with a little electricity. You can no longer have any of our wine.

You all complain that we don't build enough power plants. Well, you don't grow enough food, write enough software, make enough movies, build enough airplanes, or make enough wine.

The Californians

I live here in Los Angeles...take that rest of the US!!
oh, in case you are wondering...these facts are true.

Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.

#47822 - Mon Feb 10 2003 07:58 PM Re: Letter to America
LoveRCrowe Offline

Registered: Sat Jan 25 2003
Posts: 18
Loc: the beautiful Pacific Northwes...
Oh my... I don't know much about this energy thing. I know that this is America, the UNITED States of America. And everyone in the other 49 states that uses or eats whatever comes out of California pays for it. Is this supposed to be funny? I didn't find it funny. I live in Washington state, you know, where apples, cherries, microsoft, boeing, paper and wood come from, and we are paying twice as much for electricity since california has been having their shortage and our favorite lake is half empty most of the year because they are letting tons of water through to send power to California. I guess I just didn't get your joke, didn't want to start a debate.

#47823 - Mon Feb 10 2003 10:00 PM Re: Letter to America
fjohn Offline

Registered: Mon Dec 06 1999
Posts: 2742
Loc: Wyoming USA Way Out West
This thread was moved from Jokes and Humor without a leading explanatory note. LoveRCrowe's reply, above, was posted when the thread was in Jokes and Humor. Fjohn.
Some days it just doesn't seem worth trying to chew through the restraints.

#47824 - Mon Feb 10 2003 11:48 PM Re: Letter to America
lefois Offline
Forum Champion

Registered: Fri Feb 01 2002
Posts: 6246
Loc: Kitimat BC 
It's not JUST the USA that's affected! How about Canada? First this quote....

"California's electricity shortage has been a mixed blessing here. With California's natural gas-fired generating plants going into overdrive to stave off blackouts, British Columbians have been hit with the same kinds of gas rate increases as others in the West. "We're paying California prices for natural gas," said Ramsey, the finance minister.

BC Hydro also must wrestle with getting paid the $300 million owed to it by California's utilities. While it's willing to defer payments, it expects to get paid in full, said spokesman Wayne Cousins."

..and the whole article is here.

I get the point, though.
But Lord Andry...If California had a PROPER might not be at 48th in consumption stats! Now THAT'S a scary thought!

#47825 - Tue Feb 11 2003 11:00 AM Re: Letter to America
Jar Offline

Registered: Wed Apr 11 2001
Posts: 4224
Loc: Texas USA
Actually, in my opinion, this should be in Controversial Issues! I didn't see the humor in it either. Without exports there is no income, no jobs.
If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there worrying. It's the worry that gets you, not the lack of sleep.
-Dale Carnegie


Moderator:  ren33, sue943