Dam rite BL..LOL We're getting tired of 'being a bridesmaid instead of the bride'..

I didn't post a joke on Thursday 'cause I didn't understand 'cricket'
much less the jokes...LOL
Sooo, to get everyone "IN the Mood"..
Daffynitions:
beat:
what music students do to each other with their instruments. The down beat is performed on top of the head, while the up beat is struck under the chin.
cadence:
when everybody hopes you're going to stop, but you don't.
diatonic:
low-calorie Schweppes.
lamentoso:
with handkerchiefs.
virtuoso:
a musician with very high morals. (I know one)
music:
a complex organizations of sounds that is set down by the composer, incorrectly interpreted by the conductor, who is ignored by the musicians, the result of which is ignored by the audience.
oboe:
an ill wind that nobody blows good.
tenor:
two hours before a nooner.
diminished fifth:
an empty bottle of Jack Daniels.
perfect fifth:
a full bottle of Jack Daniels.
ritard:
there's one in every family.
relative major:
an uncle in the Marine Corps.
relative minor:
a girlfriend.
big band:
when the bar pays enough to bring two banjo players.
pianissimo:
"refill this beer bottle".
repeat:
what you do until they just expel you.
treble:
women ain't nothin' but.
bass:
the things you run around in softball.
portamento:
a foreign country you've always wanted to see.
conductor:
the man who punches your ticket to Birmingham.
arpeggio:
"Ain't he that storybook kid with the big nose that grows?"
tempo:
good choice for a used car.
A 440:
the highway that runs around Nashville.
transpositions:
1. men who wear dresses.
2. An advanced recorder technique where you change from alto to soprano fingering (or vice-versa) in the middle of a piece
cut time:
1. parole.
2. when everyone else is playing twice as fast as you are.
order of sharps:
what a wimp gets at the bar.
passing tone:
frequently heard near the baked beans at family barbecues.
middle C:
the only fruit drink you can afford when food stamps are low.
perfect pitch: the smooth coating on a freshly paved road.
tuba:
a compound word: "Hey, woman! Fetch me another tuba Bryll Cream!"
cadenza:
that ugly thing your wife always vacuums dog hair off of when company comes.
The heroine in Monteverdi's opera Frottola
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"What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is.".............
Dan Quayle