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#638295 - Fri Jul 01 2011 07:18 AM Irish One
ren33 Offline

Registered: Thu Sep 30 1999
Posts: 12519
Loc: Kowloon Tong  Hong Kong      
Due to a water shortage in Ireland, Dublin swimming baths have announced they are closing lanes 7 and 8.

Thank you.
Wandering aimlessly through FT since 1999.

#638329 - Fri Jul 01 2011 10:06 AM Re: Irish One
surdoux Offline

Registered: Wed Feb 17 2010
Posts: 294
Loc: Nottinghamshire England UK    
Nice one. Here's another.

Paddy goes to the vet with his goldfish.
"I think it's got epilepsy" he tells the vet.
The vet takes a look and says "It seems calm enough to me".
Paddy says, "I haven't taken it out of the bowl yet".
I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

#648800 - Sun Aug 21 2011 03:25 PM Re: Irish One
darksplash Offline

Registered: Sat Nov 03 2007
Posts: 505
Loc: Tyrone
Northern Ireland UK 
C'mere. There's more:

Paddy the Englishman, Paddy the Irishman and Paddy the Scotsman all went to a hotel.
"There's only one room left, and its on the top floor, which is 90 floors up but the lift is broken, so you'll have to take the stairs", said the receptionist.

They took the room and went up the stairs.

When they got to the 30th floor Paddy the Englishman told a really sad story.

A little while later when they got to the 60th floor Paddy the Scotsman told an even sadder story.

And finally, when they reached the top floor, Paddy the Irishman told the saddest story ever... "I've left the keys on the reception desk..."
There are just two types of people in this world, those who hear the music and those who don't.

#648872 - Sun Aug 21 2011 10:20 PM Re: Irish One
ozzz2002 Online   FT-cool

Registered: Mon Dec 03 2001
Posts: 20425
Loc: Sydney
NSW Australia
Paddy lost his dog and was distraught! Morag, his wife, suggested that he put an ad in the local paper, which he did.

After two weeks, there was no response at all, so Morag asked him what he wrote in the ad.

Paddy said "Here, Boy!".
The key to everything is patience. You get the chicken by hatching the egg, not smashing it.

Ex-Editor, Hobbies and Sports, and Forum Moderator


Moderator:  ozzz2002, Sypher