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What is the name of the guy who plays first base?

Who. Costello: "I'm not asking you who's on second." Abbott: "Who's on first."

What is the name of the guy who plays on second?

What. Costello: "...what's the guy's name on first base?" Abbott: "No. What is on second base."

What is the name of the guy who plays on third base?

I Don't Know. Abbott: "Who's on first." Costello: "I don't know." Abbott: "He's on third..."

What is the name of the guy who plays shortstop?

I Don't Give A Darn. Costello: "...He's on third and I don't give a darn! Abbott: "What?" Costello: "I said I don't give a darn!" Abbott: "Oh, that's our shortstop."

What is the name of the guy who plays left field?

Why. Costello: "Look, you gotta outfield?" Abbott: "Sure." Costello: "The left fielder's name?" Abbott: "Why." Costello: "I just thought I'd ask you." Abbott: "Well, I just thought I'd tell ya."

What is the name of the guy who plays center field?

Because. Costello: "Because!" Abbott: "Oh, he's center field."

What is the name of the guy who is pitching?

Tomorrow. Costello: "The pitcher's name?" Abbott: "Tomorrow."

What is the name of the guy who is playing catcher?

Today. Costello: "The catcher's name?" Abbott: "Today."

What line do Abbott and Costello say together most often?

"Third Base!". Costello: "I don't know." Together: "Third base!"

What position did Costello say he played?

Catcher. Costello: "You know I'm a catcher too." Abbott: "So they tell me."