Secret of Monkey Island Insults

15 Points Per Correct Answer - No time limit  

1. My handkerchief will wipe up your blood? It will not work, you will be drowned in the flood I hope now you have learned to stop picking your nose You make me think somebody already did So you got that job as janitor, after all.

2. My tongue is sharper then any sword? First you better stop waving it like a feather-duster Why, did you want to borrow one? Even BEFORE they smell your breath? I would be in real trouble if you ever used it

3. Every word you say to me is stupid? I wanted to make sure you would feel comfortable with me Oh yeah? That's a comeback, not an insult Yeah, but you are even stupider than my words

4. I have spoken with apes more polite then you? Yeah, but you are even stupider than my words. That's from MI4! I thought this was a MI1 Quiz! Yeah, when you were talking to yourself in the mirror. I am glad to hear you attended your family reunion

5. You run that fast? Now I know what filth and stupidity really are Why are you asking me? You should get ready to flee! That's a comeback, not an insult! If your brothers like you, better to marry a pig

6. Let's try it this way. I'll give you the comeback, you tell me an insult. (Against the swordmaster.) And I have got a little TIP for you. Get the POINT? I will stick this sword down your throat! My tongue is sharper then any sword. I have got a long, sharp lesson for you to learn today. This is the END for you, you gutter-crawling cur!

7. (SM=Swordmaster)Even BEFORE they smell your breath? There are no clever moves that can help you now. My wisest enemies run away at the first sight of me! People fall at my feet when they see me coming. This insult is the insult of them all!

8. (SM)How appropriate. You fight like a cow. I will milk every drop of blood from your body! You fight like a dairy farmer! I've never met such a coward! I'm surprised you've never gazed at your wife!

9. Your hemorrhoids are flaring up again, eh? You are a pain in the tush, sir! You are a pain in the butt, sir! You are a pain in the backside, sir! You are a pain in the bottom, sir!

10. Yes there are. You just never learned them? There are no moves that can help you now. There are no other moves that can help you now. There are no smart moves that can help you now. There are no clever moves that can help you now.