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| 1.
I should have known things weren't going to go well when Mr. Wrong proved his wrongness before we even went out. When asking me for my number, he told me what great admiration he had for the great Australian inventor Alexander Graham Bell, who invented the telephone in 1800s. Why was Mr. Wrong wrong in this case? |
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| 2.
When Mr. Wrong called me up to arrange our date, he again tried to show off his knowledge of trivia and again was wrong. When he suggested we see a movie, perhaps a new animated one, he was quick to tell me about the first full length animated motion picture, "Pinocchio", which was released by Disney in 1937. Why was Mr. Wrong wrong? |
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| 3.
On the night of my date with Mr. Wrong, he arrived on my doorstep with a bouquet of tulips. He handed them to me and smugly said, "For you, the subject of Van Gogh's famous paintings from the 1880s!" I smiled and said nothing, but I knew he was wrong; why? |
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| 4.
As we were in the car driving to a restaurant, Mr. Wrong talked my ear off about cars and all he knew about them - which, as it turns out, was not much. He went on and on about Chevrolet's first car, the Model T, which was first produced in the US in the early 20th century. I knew for sure he was wrong about that; why? |
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| 5.
When we arrived at the restaurant, we were seated and ordered drinks. When a waiter brought them over, Mr. Wrong took a sip of his bourbon and told me about that that particular type of American whiskey is associated with a place in the state of Louisiana. I nodded along and ordered myself another drink that I had the feeling I was going to need. Why was Mr. Wrong wrong about the bourbon? |
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| 6.
Over appetizers, we discussed foods that have odd or funny names. Mr. Wrong told me about one of his favourites, which was, according to him, the Italian soup called minestrone. "Did you know 'minestrone' means 'priest choker' in English? I mean, who comes up with these names!" he exclaimed. I chuckled but again knew he was wrong. Why, in this case? |
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| 7.
By the time our main courses arrived, the evening really felt like it was dragging on. As I cut into my bacon-wrapped filet mignon, Mr. Wrong observed that I like bacon (well, he was right about that one!). "Do you also like the actor Kevin Bacon? I like his movies. My favourite is "American Beauty". That won a Best Picture Oscar, you know. Best Picture of 1999." I mm-hmmed as I tried to eat quickly to get the meal over with. Why was he wrong this time? |
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| 8.
I tried to decline coffee and dessert in an attempt to end the evening, but Mr. Wrong insisted we stay for dessert so that he'd have a chance to tell me about his recent trip to Denmark. "I had a chance to see in person the famous statue of a fairy while in the capital city of Copenhagen," he told me. For goodness' sake, he can't even be right about places he's been and things he's seen in person! Why was he wrong in this case? |
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| 9.
Finally, after one of the longest nights of my life, I was home. At my front door, resisting the urge to just run inside and lock the door, I turned to say goodnight and shake Mr. Wrong's hand. He jerked his hand away and said, "Ah, sorry, I'm not a handshaker. You know, like that Howard Cosell guy, who hosted that show with the briefcases. What was it called? Oh, yeah. "Deal or No Deal"!" I paused and replied, "Right. Okay then, good night!", going inside as I thought to myself that he was wrong yet again; why? |
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| 10.
A couple of days later, Mr. Wrong left me a voicemail to say what a good time he had with me. "I thought we really had chemistry," he said in his message, "I took a chemistry class once. My favourite element is water, which is good since I need it to live! Well, um, anyways, call me back". As I dialed his number to let him know I wasn't interested in going out again, I thought about how he was wrong again. Why? |
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