1. What Bill thought was a karate demonstration on his subway car turned out to be what? A husband and wife having an argument Two old ladies trying to take a seat from a wino A couple of kids trying to fight off the cops A crazy guy trying to catch an invisible bat

2. What was the title of the piece the two winos did while on the subway? Misunderstood Illiteracy Friday Night Incoherency

3. The British lost the coin toss for the Revolutionary War. Did they call heads or tails? Answer: (One Word - Heads or Tails)

4. What position did Bill say he played for Temple University football? 2nd string halfback 3rd string fullback 1st string quaterback waterboy

5. After the coach talked the team up, what happened when they tried to take the field? The locker room door was locked The Catholic players all started doing the rosary They all fainted at the sight of the other team They had missed the game and forfeited

6. In the movie "Hud", why did they have to shoot the cows? They had mad cow disease They were being poisoned They were eating the neighboring pastures They had hoof and mouth disease

7. How many karate schools are there in Greenwich Village? 230 23 23,000,000 230,000

8. Bill thought the easiest way to learn karate was to just learn what? How to fall The two-fingered kill The shout A judo chop

9. Bill learned a move that he practiced at home on his brother until he wiped him out. Why didn't this move work in when he actually got mugged? The mugger was too far away The mugger was his brother The guy was just trying to get directions The mugger was a midget

10. What did the kid in the hair tonic commercial have to do before he could throw the football? Wash his hands Pay the football player Use the hair tonic Pick it up

11. Where was Noah when God contacted him? In the garage In the rec room In the bathroom In the mountains

12. How long did God say he was going to make it rain? 1000 days One year 40 days and 40 nights 6 months

13. What did Noah's neighbor tell him to do with his ark? "Get it out of my driveway" "Get these animals out of my backyard" "Don't forget the shuffleboard" "Move it off of my front lawn"

14. When Noah's neighbor asked him why he was building an ark Noah couldn't tell him but he did give him a hint. What was the hint? What did you do last Sunday morning? Can you swim? How long can you tread water? Is your basement waterproofed?

15. What was the matter with the elephant that Noah brought aboard the ark? It had a runny nose It didn't like it's mate It had diarrhea It was pregnant