Dave Barry's Money Secrets - Part I

15 Points Per Correct Answer - No time limit  

1. What is the subtitle of this book? How to survive in a dog-eat-dog world. Or: How I learned to stop worrying and write a book to make money. But I'll tell you anyway. Like: Why is there a giant eyeball on the dollar?

2. Why does Dave say you need to read this book? What else have you got to do? Chances are, when it comes to finances, you are a complete moron. It helped Dave, so it will help you. You don't have to attend a seminar.

3. By 9000 B.C., the most commonly accepted form of money was cattle. What does Dave say was the worst thing about this system? Your money could die. You could get gored by the larger denominations. Your money could run away from you. The cash registers were disgusting.

4. One-third of our Gross National Product is sent to the government each year in the form of taxes. According to Dave, what is the express purpose of sending them this money? Provide and maintain infrastructure for our country. Pay all the government employees. Provide for the welfare of our fellow countrymen. To be wasted.

5. Miscellaneous expenses are the biggest area of personal financial concern, cash-flow wise. Where does Dave say is a good place to cut back on these? Entertainment. Your children. Snack food. Unnecessary trips to the mini-mart.

6. Every day there are stories in the media about large companies losing huge sums of money. According to Dave, what is one important fact these stories teach us? World events can negatively affect businesses. The business world is tough. Executives of these companies do not necessarily know how to run a company better than you or a reasonably bright Labrador Retriever. There are down cycles in business.

7. What does Dave cite as an example of a major corporation doing something that appeared to be clinically insane? Whoever made Fresca. Newspapers trying to gain new subscribers by promoting their web sites. ABC airing "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" twenty times per week. GM making the Pontiac Aztek.

8. Why does Dave say that corporate CEOs should be cautious in the running of their companies? To get the best returns for the stockholders. To avoid getting canned and having to get a real job. Because the marketplace can be very volatile. Because the authorities, in recent years, have become quite picky about enforcing rules that prohibit lying and stealing vast quantities of money.

9. According to Dave, how does medical insurance work? You or your employer sends money to the insurance company every month. When you need treatment you notify the company. They then notify you that your treatment is only partially covered, or not at all. It will pay everything, no questions asked. After the deductible is satisfied, it pays everything. Nobody knows.

10. According to Dave, what is a little known side effect of smoking? Heart disease. Premature aging. Lung cancer. Being eaten by wolves.