"South Park" - "Chef's Salty Chocolate Balls" Quiz

Answer: gay cowboys eating pudding

Kyle and Stan didn't understand what independent films were, so Cartman explained: "Independent films are those black and white hippie movies. They're always about gay cowboys eating pudding." Wendy, the only student who seemed enthusiastic about the festival, corrected him: "No they're not! Independent films are produced outside the Hollywood system.

They're movies without all the glitz and glamour of Hollywood." Cartman was not to be swayed, and challenged her: "Show me one independent film that isn't about gay cowboys eating pudding!"

Answer: boba tea

When they approached, Chef offered them his low-calorie and all-natural cookie selections, but the woman asked, "Do you have any tofu or steamed celery?" Chef was confused and the man declared, "I would kill for some couscous right now." Chef didn't know what they were talking about, asking "Whose goose?" The woman excused them, saying "We brought some food from the natural market in LA."

Answer: Mr. Garrison

Cartman was complaining about the smell when something splashed in the water in front of the boys. They jumped in fear but then a figure rose from the sewage in snorkeling gear and the boys realized it was Mr. Garrison. They asked what he was doing "down in the sewer with a bunch of snorkel stuff on" and Mr. Garrison claimed he was just "hangin' out." When the boys seemed a bit skeptical, Mr. Garrison asked them, "Do you know how to file a police report?" They said they didn't and Mr. Garrison seemed satisfied, putting his mouthpiece back in and dropping into the sewer water again.

Answer: Leonardo DiCaprio

As soon as someone suspected it was DiCaprio, camera flashes started going off and a buzz erupted in the room. After a moment, they realized it wasn't DiCaprio after all, and the disappointment was palpable, as everyone groaned and slouched back in their seats. Kyle delivered his heartfelt plea for Mr. Hankey survival, saying, "He's getting sick because his ecosystem is all out of whack because of all the extra poo in the sewer. If you don't all leave and go home soon, Mr. Hankey's gonna die." There was a pregnant pause in the room before the Hollywood folk erupted in discussion about the great story, saying how it could be "the next 'Free Willy'," asking if they could put a "crime-fighting rabbit or a lovable turtle" in it, and inquiring about how much Kyle was charging for the rights.

Answer: library

Robert Redford had gathered everyone in front of the South Park library to announce that the First Annual South Park Film Festival had drawn more people than the previous year's Sundance festival. He went on to say, "And I'm very pleased to announce that in honor of the South Park people who have welcomed us, we are going to build a Hollywood Planet restaurant, right here where this library used to stand." As soon as he'd said it, a wrecking ball swung in behind him and knocked the library to the ground.

The Mayor's aide seemed a bit concerned and asked if they could do that, to which the Mayor replied, "They're Hollywood! They can do anything!"

Answer: toothbrush

Mr. Hankey was always quite concerned with the boys' personal hygiene, and didn't want to let his own suffer because of a trip to the surface.

Answer: $3

The Mayor was trying unsuccessfully to get Robert Redford to stop construction on Hollywood Planet, but she wasn't the only one ruing by her involvement with the Hollywood folks:
Cartman: "But this doesn't make sense to me, Marty! Okay, you told me the movie made a lot of money!"
Director: "Mmph, right. Two million, minus your agent's fee, minus your lawyer's fee, minus my fee, and with publicity and taxes taken out, you get three dollars! That's more than most people in your position make, trust me!"
Stan: "Serves you right, Cartman! You're a sellout!
Cartman: "I'm not a sellout! What's a sellout?"
Stan: "If you work in the entertainment business and you make money, you're a sellout!"

Answer: one of Chef's Salty Chocolate Balls

Mr. Hankey had been whisked away to the ICU at Hell's Pass Hospital, and Kyle was mourning the imminent loss of his "best friend after Stan." Looking for some comfort, Kyle asked Chef, "does poo go to Heaven?" Chef was clearly not sure how to respond, but finally said, "Well, uh, I kinda hope not." When Kyle started weeping, Chef changed his tune, saying "I mean, sure it does." Then, to further improve Kyle's mood, Chef put one of his Salty Balls in Mr. Hankey's mouth "to take with him to poo heaven." As Kyle and Chef headed out of the room, Mr. Hankey came to, saying that the Salty Ball was "delicious." Chef concluded that his "Salty Chocolate Balls must have rejuvenated him" and Kyle, thrilled to have his friend back, decreed that Chef had the "best balls in the whole world."

Answer: yes

Like Mickey Mouse in "Fantasia", Mr. Hankey donned a sorcerer's cap and summoned all the sewage in South Park, directing it to flood the streets and engulf Hollywood Planet. The Hollywood types ran for their cars, speeding away from South Park as quickly as they could manage. Once they were all gone, Kyle congratulated Mr. Hankey, but the Mayor voiced some reservations about the victory: "Ohh, yeah. Now all we have is a town covered in [poop]! This is much better!"

Answer: no

After Wendy shared what she'd learned about the overall poor quality of independent films, Cartman declared that he'd learned something as well: "Being a sellout is sweet. Because you make a lot of money. And when you have money, you don't have to hang out with any [poor] losers like you guys. Screw you guys, I'ma goin' home."