Special Sub-Topic: Caddyshack Quotes Click Here To Play: Caddyshack Quotes

"You owe me one gumball machine."

Lou Loomis. Angie jumps off the roof of the caddyshack onto Danny's back. Angie's brother, Tony D'Annunzio is about to fight with him because Danny called Tony a jerk. Mayhem ensues and a gumball machine becomes one of the casualties.

"Elihu, would you come and loofah my stretch marks?"

Mrs. Smails. Danny is hiding from the Judge in the bathroom because the Judge caught him in his bedroom with his niece Lacy Underall. Mrs. Smails naturally thinks that it is the Judge in the bathroom and she asks Danny for assistance.

"Lou raised the price of coke, he's been losing at the track."

Danny Noonan. Danny is covering for Lou at the caddyshack because Lou's gone to the bookies. Tony walks in after a tough caddy assignment with two elderly golfers, needing a coke. When Tony thinks he's been shortchanged, Danny gives him an explanation.

Complete this quote. Ty Webb: "Don't sell yourself short Judge. You're a tremendous ______?"

Slouch. The full conversation. Judge Smails: "You know, you should play with Dr. Beeper and myself. I mean, he's been club champion for three years running and I'm no slouch myself." Ty Webb: "Don't sell yourself short Judge, you're a tremendous slouch." What a great one-liner.

"Oh, this your wife, huh? A lovely lady. Hey baby, you must've been something before electricity."

Al Czervik. Al comments on Mrs. Smails' apparent age at the dance in the clubhouse. The Judge isn't too pleased!

"Fuzzy little foreigner!"

Carl Spackler. Carl shows his contempt towards groundskeeper Sandy after he's ordered to kill the gophers. Carl doesn't understand Sandy's Scottish accent.

"Gimme some of those 'naked-lady' tees."

Al Czervik. Al enters the club shop for the first time and attempts to buy nearly everything in sight, much to the displeasure of the Judge who is watching.

"What's wrong with lumber? I own two lumberyards"

Ty Webb. Ty is talking with Danny about the latter's possible future working in a lumberyard if he doesn't go to college.

"My dad, never liked you."

Ty Webb. Ty gives his reasons for competing in the illegal tournament against the Judge. The Judge had tried to persuade Ty not to play by reminding him that the Judge and Ty's father built the golf club together.

"This steak still has marks from where the jockey was hitting it!"

Al Czervik. Al comments on the inferior quality of the meat at the restaurant in the country club.

"Well, I got a lot of stuff on order. You know... credit trouble."

Carl Spackler. Carl gives excuses to Ty as to why his living space is so awful.

"Don't you people have homes?"

Judge Elihu Smails. Judge Smails witnesses a pair of club members playing cards in the gentlemans dressing room and enquires as to why they're still there.

"The only good varmint poontang, is dead varmint poontang. I think."

Carl Spackler. Carl on his mission to destroy the gopher ruining the golf course.

Hey you scratched my anchor!

Al Czervik. Al complains to the Judge when the anchor on his yacht gets scratched after it gets dropped through the Judge's boat at the sailing club.

Correct me if I'm wrong Sandy. but if I kill all the golfers, they're going to lock me up and throw away the key.

Carl Spackler. Carl misinterprets Groundskeeper Sandy's orders to kill the gophers on the course due to his strong Scottish accent.