1. The invitation, given to you by your cousin Lenny from the newspaper, says the function gets underway at 8:00 PM. What time should you arrive? at 7:45 to so you don't keep the Prez waiting at 5:00 to get a good parking spot at 8:15 to be fashionably late as close to 8:00 as possible and risk being the first to arrive

2. Oh, great, you get cornered by some member of the Cabinet who's yapping on about an appropriations bill. How should you handle this difficult social situation without hurting feelings? tell the speaker you need to refresh your drink say in your best foreign accent "No talk English, Joe." tell the speaker you're going to bust a kidney so gotta find the can listen patiently then get another party involved and make a discreet exit

3. A waiter brings around a tray of crab puffs during the evening. How many should you take at one time? none 1 2 as many as you want

4. Finally, the Marine Band strikes up a tune to announce that the President and First Lady are entering. What song do they play? The National Anthem Hail to the Chief God Bless America America the Beautiful

5. You sit down at your assigned seat along side the ambassador from Belize. What is the one thing you should definitely NOT say to make small talk? So tell me, what's it like to be an ambassador? Great bash, wouldn't you agree? So, how are things in Africa? I hear it gets pretty hot in your part of the world.

6. The first course arrives...some kind of salad dish. Hmmm, you look at the array of the First Lady's silverware and see there are four different forks. Which should you use? the one nearest the plate the largest one the smallest one the one farthest from the plate

7. After an appetizer of caviar mousse, the waiter drops off a sorbet. What is sorbet? a fine, red wine a chilling bucket for wine a finger bowl a light fruit ice

8. When the main course does arrive, you're horrified to see a tiny stuffed bird, about the size of a pigeon, alongside the piped mashed potato and fresh, Iowa green beens. What kind of bird will you be dining on this evening? roast duckling quail squab pheasant under glass

9. After dinner, there's a concert by Yo-Yo Ma. What kind of music can you expect to hear tonight? native Chinese folk music violin etudes cello solo works viola interludes

10. As you're leaving, you decide to take a little keepsake of your memorable night at the White House. What would be an appropriate memento? your seating name tag an ash tray a small porcelain figurine a piece of silverware