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Subject: Satguru is here

Posted by: satguru
Date: May 02 07

I have not left the building, just moved to another mansion, as they say in the bible. This is the headline, the articles will follow as always.

2041 replies. 1 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 103

satguru

Back already- that's called freedom albeit empty freedom. All I needed to do today was read an electricity meter, and the one charity shop I got to while still open didn't have a photo album (that's a first) and as I didn't see a part fly out of my lock am unable to find the item on the floor even if I knew which room I opened it in. I must phone you know who as well despite not wanting another arrangement (who would under those circumstances?), and have quite a bit of tidying to do of all the things I've brought back from my grandma's.

There's about 4 hours of TV on tonight plus one to record- all or nothing but will keep me out of mischief. Even with the freedom and completed tasks you can still be tired and bored, and today I was both. Tired probably from dealing with the last couple of weeks and bored for the obvious reasons. That will change as I'm busy now working through my list of things that will take my mind off it. The new washing machine passed the test (minus instructions) as the socks are no longer stiff and powdery when completed. The old machine worked but was about 30 years old and clearly only doing half a job.

Otherwise various discussions here keep my mind alive, global warming, employment, psychic powers. I read an article once that said we all want the same thing but think there are different ways to get it. That makes pretty good sense, and enlightenment is a single goal which is the same for all seekers, much like the contentment we all want from having all we need. Wars are about people believing they won't get any of this as someone else is stopping them, so they try and get rid of the blockage. Human but not civilised. My wars are with facts. I have now been trained to stop making them wars but lessons, and will now avoid the arguments that arose elsewhere as a result. Two way lessons as everyone teaches and learns, although if you spend time studying where others listen to politicians then the studiers have the edge.

If anything good blows in like in dreams or the sun coming out, totally outside my control, all the better. I can deal with the time for now but am not designed to be alone very long, who is?

Reply #141. Aug 03 10, 11:24 AM

satguru

Can I get an early night tonight? Step one, blog early. I will see. It's great to be surrounded by freedom after the July and earlier of dentists and cemeteries, but a shame there isn't more I can make from it so far. I went to Marks and Spencer's and have now been given another voucher for John Lewis so the decent food continues. I got a few more business calls out of the way, got another photo album and then came back for my raspberry iced buns I've only ever seen at M&S. Diet? What's that?

No TV really till 10 tonight and as the rain's been on and off all day walks and bikes have been saved till the clouds go away. I've got an hour's video to watch now and then carry on my little jobs including putting the photos in the album and scanning one lot on the computer. Grace was out last night but will keep trying and it's officially my turn to call. The crystal ball is calling me now so will save adding anything irrelevant or too much detail and return when I have more to report. If that ever happens.

Reply #142. Aug 04 10, 10:51 AM

lesley153

An early night - what's brought this on, dare I ask?

Reply #143. Aug 04 10, 12:30 PM

satguru

It was only in theory, I do need to cut a couple of hours back as I'm missing things the next day now. Didn't work mind you, someone sent me a two page reply on Facebook as I was switching off and had to answer it. Got a nice broigus on my hands as a result but she did start it so big deal.

Apart from lack of resulting sleep I think I still get tired very easily now. I went to Enfield partly as there was nothing else to do and partly as there were some signs to take there sooner or later and it wore me out. 17 miles each way, only a few traffic jams mainly due to road works up there, but I'm getting past it. I just hope these current limits can increase again as I'm really not old enough for the rows of armchairs in the Nightingale Home quite yet. At this rate I'll need a carer...

The Enfield trip ended up producing one sign I knew was there, a council issued one (ie out of proper collection but looked like a proper one), saw a few which weren't old I saw on Streetview but can't tell there, another no through road (all over the place) and two old bollards with catseyes instead of the new reflectors. Better than nothing and got me somewhere different at least.

So this week I know I was tired from the previous two (something which grows every decade), but got my food, checked my grandma's old place, went to visit my mum, went to Enfield (and discovered the part I went to on the west side of it isn't actually that bad while the east is like something from Dickens), and have kept out of trouble. Still no plans but there's always something trivial to do, my booking for tomorrow wasn't confirmed for some reason, do I stay around just in case or go out and get a last minute arrival? Not that I have many ideas but why would someone ask for a slot and then not tell me yes or no? I will go out if necessary tomorrow but would rather know in advance if she's changed her mind.

I suppose if my article response had been negative I'd have heard something but can never tell and seems I may have to either wait two months and see, or ask him and probably not get a reply as he's so busy he only sends messages at his own behest. Don't rock the boat. Even when I try not to rock boats it happens, people are offended by things we wouldn't be a lot of the time so when we avoid the obvious actions we expect would ruin our chances it's some strange comment or action we'd never have seen in advance that derails our ambitions, just like women are put off by different things and can never see in advance who'll respond when we slip up or not.

On the woman front at least I've made two calls to you know who this week and she was out, and as no one in her family gives her messages won't have found I did. And as it's on the radio why on earth is not only the news about Naomi Campbell taking favours from a Liberian president years ago but the first headline? And as she's from Brixton where did she get her American accent from? Charlize Theron? I'm off for a walk now before it's time to get up, despite not having gone to bed yet. But when I do many people are already getting up. That's a real 24 hour society and I'm creating it.

Reply #144. Aug 05 10, 5:02 PM

satguru

This week was the first with no obligations (reading a meter doesn't really qualify) or arrangements (the two can tend to overlap nowadays as I'm not always comfortable with some), and probably had a typical week doing whatever was available, a couple of photo and shopping trips, business phone calls and that was about it. I've just heard our local reunion (30-40 years) is in two weeks and is always good to meet one old face let alone a room full of them (not sure the numbers but all familiar so far). So although I knew it was this month didn't know the details till today, and that is now one entry in the diary.

Otherwise it's day to day stuff, especially as in working out what to do on each one. I am being given some lessons elsewhere online in sorting myself out, the first has been accepted but the next is still in process. My proposition is I am doing my best and some things (people mainly) can't be created directly. If there's a magical method a couple of people appear to believe in then I'd like to know it, but all my life people just turn up. They're like magnets, the few tuned to me stick and the rest fall off. It's a small group and most last 10 years plus. Not many people really get me and vice versa, so when you click then it works long term. You can't find them by joining groups as I've done that most of my life as well and the two rarely coincided. I can only think of one new friend in 4 years at college although in the first year one was already in my class so didn't need to find more. The next year I had a couple of people I went round with but when I had to resit the year they didn't even call to see how I was so not proper friends, and then met one when I went back for year two who I carried on seeing until he suddenly vanished after he'd got married and got a new job some years after graduation. I don't understand that but people have their own reasons we'll never know.

No need to add women are ten times harder to get as they have to like you as well, ie not just your personality. So naturally as nearly everyone else of my age who wanted to meet someone has then despite having made and received offers neither have coincided. Is that really my fault? Could I have done anything differently? I think what these critics are asking is 'Can I be a different person?' and we all know the answer to that. Unless you're causing trouble in some way then people should take you as you are, and there's no need to change, and it won't last anyway. Anyway, I've asked what I need to do about it and will await the answer. I said I'd thought of everything (as had a few other people who tried to help) and couldn't see anything we'd missed, so if she does then that's a true miracle. They happen but do wonder what's coming next.

Reply #145. Aug 06 10, 7:03 PM

satguru

May you live in interesting times my backside... I've been accused of being negative over on my other blog, and to look at what I've said and try and fix it. Tall order I think. There's no obvious solution to most situations from inside, and some from outside either, and asking people to lift themselves up from their own bootstraps is also a physical impossibility if you try it.

Miracles could happen, and if there's anything I can do to contribute all the better. I do notice my own issues when someone points one out specifically, and like having a hanging bogie is easy to act on if someone sees it when you can't. Nice image there I think. That woman hasn't coincided with me at the gym yet or her friend I know. I'll ask the instructor next week otherwise in case I can either eliminate her or know to keep trying.
Due to a new Flickr group I spent some time today wandering around a sewage farm (in photo forum), and found it was an impressive building in landscaped surroundings. Usually the whole area does smell but today only a bit on the way in but nothing there itself. There's a footpath right through the middle of it along a canal and very scenic too.

I've made two calls to you know who so far and as no one gives her messages she'll think I haven't bothered. I expect I'll see her this week as it's about time and of course if it was more profitable (profitable full stop actually) I would have done so far more frequently. It's like trying to change channels on the TV when the battery's gone, you can press all you like but nothing happens. Story of most of my love life actually now I think about it. Something else I presume I was picked up for moaning about but it's reality and I'd rather moan where people can look away than say it to people directly like so many people I know.

I will probably have to wait 2 months or so now to know about my article for certain, but haven't heard anything bad and would hope if he'd got anything else to say he would have done to me rather than let me find out either way. No more thoughts or ideas as yet, it's gone a bit quiet but often worse when it isn't. I expect I'll get the photo sooner or later to make a painting from so that'll keep me out of trouble for a while anyway. I'd be happy to do that all week and get paid for it but at current rates if I sell a painting I'm getting well below minimum wage. Better than Van Gogh did though while he was alive.

Reply #146. Aug 08 10, 3:29 PM

satguru

It's nice to send invoices off but a whole lot nicer when the buggers actually pay- one is decent but seem to have melted into another dimension and the other usually manages eventually but with one excuse may try and wriggle. I'm free now, and will just see what happens day to day. I could play golf after a few years (the usual place closed and the other is too small and keep hitting out of the area) but after a few lessons from my father am ready for the difficult shots now I know how to play them. There's also a local museum I didn't even remember was there and had an exhibition of old house interiors but probably over by now. If I can actually park there. And maybe even tennis with Grace again as at least it means I know where we're going before she announces it.

I will be going to bed earlier now, it slipped recently and means I'm starting to miss arrangements now so must go back a bit. I'm still being given lessons on self improvement on Facebook, they say when the pupil's ready the teacher arrives, and I had been stuck for a while, in my fields you don't settle for how things are, you try and fix things. You only believe you can as others have before you, but it's not easy. And you need good directions as there's only what you know otherwise and these involve areas you don't know. But although I've been accused of not doing my best all my life I couldn't do a lot more- certainly not at college anyway. It's very easy for others who know ahead already where and how you should be getting there, but instead of standing on the sidelines poking fun or worse a little compassion goes a lot further. But the teachers are rarely perfect as well, only human like you and me.

Maybe there's a lesson in receiving the criticism, it's all connected at least, but it's not a method I've ever used in teaching, I left that to my family and saw the consequences. Maybe that's the lesson, even teachers aren't perfect.

Reply #147. Aug 10 10, 4:19 PM

trojan11

Sat, I know that I always seem to bring a serious thread down, but your mention of the 'hanging bogey' reminded of something that happened so many years ago. I was going out with this gorgeous girl, every other kid on the block wanted her, but for some reason I didn't really find her terribly attractive, so I broke with her, in a night club. Next day she turned up, looking gorgeous and delectable, ringing on my door bell, and crying floods. So I let her in. I shall always her remember saying, "But don't you know that I love you.... I would do anything for you....I want to marry you!" All the time she was saying this, her head was swinging to and fro, and this huge green gilbert was hanging from her nose, swinging quite disgustingly from her nasal cavity with every movement of her admittedly very pretty head. If I had any doubt, it dissolved right then and there.
I know, what a shallow git.

Reply #148. Aug 10 10, 8:50 PM

satguru

Best comedy is based on truth! I say that those sort of situations are the test of love or not- if it doesn't put you off then you know it's a winner. Of course if you're married something revolting will happen sooner or later and not much use if you find out then...

Reply #149. Aug 11 10, 4:18 PM

Lochalsh

First, Professer speaks in his blog of his runny, bloody nose and his efforts to stanch the tide; now, Trojan mentions pendant nasal contents in Sat's blog. Please, guys, I'm a delicate flower!

Is nose talk a British predilection? :)

Reply #150. Aug 11 10, 4:36 PM

satguru

We like our bodily functions for sure, and men usually find them funny as well. It's cheaper than going to the theatre for a laugh anyway. I'd say it's British humour but are other countries who must like it as well (including Japan apparently).

It's a shame we don't have the comments box like the old days so can do everything separately, but at least we can still keep up here so won't moan about it again, honestly.

So, today was my Waitrose visit (more vouchers!), and as it wasn't my money bought the stuff I'd never get normally which was much more expensive than usual. I hope it's worth the extra when I eat it. The viennas are in the fridge (I'm not sure if I can freeze them, and if so how much longer to boil them for, but will find out. Lesley?) but have 6 weeks and can easily eat them all by then without having to freeze them. I may add an egg and possibly baked beans as well as the mash, it'll be like the old days again. We did have a tomato sauce and vienna fight at my friend's birthday party once (about 10 I think), and was one of the best I'd ever been to. The sauce and sausages were flying across the dining table until we were all splattered in red and used up everything left on the table after we'd finished eating the rest. We were all rolling around with laughter by the end, shows how one thing brings back so many memories.

I came home to find after the restart which was starting when I left the screen was black. I switched everything off, on, fiddled with the F keys and sadly whatever I did there was only one F and that wasn't a function if you get my drift. Not wanting to be minus the internet (I calculated I could probably keep busy for the rest of the day without it and that was it) I drove the other side of London to pick up the laptop I keep with my father so I can play my quizzes there and originally so I could moderate without leaving days off without me. Of course if I'm playing the monthlies or the global I can't be knocking on neighbour's doors or miss quizzes when I go there so a vital fixture and also a very important backup for days like this, although this is the first time I've needed it since the new PC a few years back. It had a reconditioned hard disk last month and was warned it may not be reliable, as the PC was too slow for a new big one. It was great till today and then poof. I dropped it off to be fixed on the way and may get it back at the weekend, either dead or alive. I hadn't plugged this machine into the cable before and pressed all the wrong buttons when I got it hooked up (I was only told the ethernet should work as it was but didn't) but the operator explained what I missed and took about half an hour (included a restart) to undo all the damage I'd done by trying to connect to my old account details. Oops. But now I should both be OK for now and know what to do if I have to use it again. But I will spend more time on housework now as I realised how easy it was to stay on this and only do the urgent stuff.

No plans ahead, I couldn't make that phone call as I went to the gym and my father instead so couldn't arrange anything else (she tends to want to see you straight after making a call to or from her) and not exactly sorry. Now I don't know about Gretna Green, as apart from her there are no obvious opportunities. One ex has just separated from her husband, and the reason she is an ex was my idea so any offers to stay here for one day/two days/ten years is being strongly resisted. She's a good friend I've known just over half my life but not suitable for anything more as she isn't what I'd call 100% if you get the drift. I used to think she was being funny when I first met her and then realised she wasn't and the penny dropped. But living in my road it wasn't easy to avoid her once we'd met (she'd been there about 19 years before I ever knew but it was a long road) so carried on seeing her ever since.

I hope tomorrow offers more interest. I got plenty done today (way more than planned but kept me busy) and am still being too slow on the crystal ball as people are getting them earlier now than they used to and if I pause I miss it when I have the same one but wait just in case. It does get obsessive as you can see by the same people on the lists day after day. I interrupt meals, TV programmes and even shopping trips to get back for the .50-.55 on the timer, and am happy now if I just get the chance to try my words regardless of the result as it's far worse when I have them ready and someone else gets it.

I'm still waiting for the exact painting commission, I expect he has to check many photos and make a proper decision as he'll have to look at it for many years ahead. Someone else asked if they were for sale but hasn't made me an offer. Nothing heard from the magazine but presumably if he had a problem with an old article being updated (rather than published already which I'd not expect anyone to do) it ought to be OK. Tomorrow is another day, and quite probably vienna related.

Reply #151. Aug 11 10, 8:13 PM

satguru

Vienna report:

After possibly 30 years (or maybe not?) I had three viennas tonight, one minute in the microwave now rather than boiling (doesn't even mention boiling on the packet) and were smaller than I remember but tasted just the same. I have to freeze the rest anyhow as it's two days only otherwise. My mum reminded me of that.

The laptop's up and running now, it hangs for minutes on end (two years old or so) and as it does it randomly would have a job for anyone to fix it at a cost near what the whole thing did. No older computers ever did it but this got worse as time went by. Bit of a mystery that as the scans pick nothing up. This week is a bit of a copy of last week, except I didn't go to Enfield, but just think of things to do on the day and besides the rain just cycled to the reservoir today and took photos. I have now started clearing old papers again mainly as I'm looking for a set of letters from the 70s which must be somewhere and knew I'd pick up all the other stuff on the way if nothing else. And I just realised I didn't make my calls tonight as I was already on the phone to someone else who basically needed my free professional help. Funny how many people only remember you when you have something useful you can do for them. And another single woman I missed out with.

I hope the computer will be able to be fixed, and by the weekend, I can't be bothered setting the scanner up on this (and may not have the driver anyway), and the freezing really gets on my wick. I can't think of anything else and will just see what the universe provides. Bubkes, chai cuck and tsimmes or possibly a zetz in the kishkas. Or all three.

Reply #152. Aug 12 10, 4:36 PM

lesley153

Three's not enough! What did you eat them with, and did you enjoy them?

Most people's memories are sharpened when they remember something you can do for them. Hmmm.

Please define chai cuck, Google wouldn't tell me. And best of luck getting your computer sorted.

Reply #153. Aug 12 10, 6:28 PM

trojan11

Try pupusas, Sat. They're easy to make and you can fill them with anything..........and I mean anything. I've stuffed them cheese, bacon, all sorts. I once put four frankfurters in my microwave for four minutes. They blew up!

Reply #154. Aug 12 10, 8:24 PM

satguru

I think three's about right for me, had salad and instant mash which is the best thing to go with them. Never heard of pupusas, must look that up.

The Yiddish was for quite a good reason as the words were almost all poo related so better to mask them in foreign. I got beaten by the filter once with an English version. They all boil down to sweet FA in English though in basic meaning.

Reply #155. Aug 13 10, 9:59 AM

lesley153

Here you are David - a recipe
http://www.whats4eats.com/breads/pupusas-recipe
and a picture of a production line.

Thought they might all be nothing, taking my cue from bubkes, which means some small beans, or some goat droppings. Lovely. :)

Reply #156. Aug 13 10, 6:06 PM

satguru

I suspect the Yiddish predominance of toilet words means it's in our blood somehow. I'll check those out but am no cook- all the viennas exploded (as they usually do) even though I pricked one to test, that went the most, but they always taste the same and were still in one piece.

And today was pretty quiet, it was raining again which didn't help and the short time I had to take photos on my way out was stopped as there was no parking for any reasonable distance. I made another little music video when I got home after putting Garry's poem to music, although as my printer doesn't connect to the laptop wrote three pages of words I had trouble reading in a pretty difficult song at the best of times. I think I got away with it though.
If I ever get back to my old patch I'll be able to walk to the shops to get Jewish food and may even bump into a few old people from school, although when I worked there for years various people did come in the shop but although it was good to see them again none were ones I knew that well. No one I did is left there at all now, if I did move back there'd be no one new in my life unless I met more for the first time. There is a little more socially arranged there than here but not a lot.

Still not a plan in sight, I am waiting for a message about CO2 being innocent from one who knows far better than me, as my new plan if possible will be to have simple scientific formulas which are just figures, and would need a better scientist to disagree with, if they even can. Global warming (whatever else they try and call it- it was the greenhouse effect before them) is a good test of my intuition. Although I haven't got the science to pull apart their figures it's so vague no scientist seems to understand it either. Nothing about it is clear. They quote the figures and expect to draw precise conclusions from implication, which is not science so I and the IPCC are also entitled to opinions on it. Even new studies saying whatever is happening has speeded up or it's still getting hotter stand alone in a sea of contradiction, and the total figures which are really the only ones you can be sure of are more or less stable or following cycles thousands of years long. I simply wait and hope one by one people will realise there's something wrong with the reporting and realise it's not worth any effort or concern. The next message may help a long way in that process.

Let's see tomorrow, it may be predictable...

Reply #157. Aug 13 10, 7:33 PM

lesley153

You can heat the viennas for ten minutes in boiled or gently simmering water if you don't want them to explode, but I agree, it doesn't matter a bit if they do.

And thank you, now I know what the three illegible pages meant.

Reply #158. Aug 14 10, 9:05 AM

Jazmee27

Best of luck with your technological woes!

Reply #159. Aug 16 10, 12:32 PM

satguru

Where have I been? Good question, bit of a quiet patch I must say. I asked the gym instructor today about that woman as I hadn't seen her for a couple of weeks, 'Oh, she's on her honeymoon'. One more down as per. The replacement disk on the PC was to blame, and now waiting for a new one rather than a recon as I would have been better off with before. How long that will take I can't say and having to carry the laptop around everywhere and lose half my hardware which can't plug in.

The last two weeks have been free, and besides quite a bit of rain did no more than a trip to Enfield if shopping isn't included. It's the same ahead and may go and see a woman who appears to be after me and invited me over but wasn't exactly my type. I've got more meditation CDs on their way as well which will keep me out of trouble for a while, and any more will happen at the time. I've heard nothing more about the painting or the article but can only hope. Streetview hasn't delivered anything else, although am now looking 30 miles away and can live without it although one more old sign would be nice.

So an open book (or sewer) for now, what appears either written or floating will appear at the time. I even seem to be running out of philosophy now, probably a good sign, but one less thing to write about. I think that'll be saved now if asked and not otherwise, there's little new to know on that after so long finding it out. I really need some inspiration.

Reply #160. Aug 16 10, 3:24 PM

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