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Subject: We are many

Posted by: Jazmee27
Date: Jun 20 20

Hey. We have DID, which stands4Dissociative Identity Disorder. our system name is now the sanctuary hope system. &we have a cluster group (mostly comprising infants&toddlers--an army of them) named Legion (a small portion of the group splintered off2become Rogue Legion... these are folks stuck in destructive ways&past beliefs detrimental2the whole. some people might consider how we live our lives2b detrimental, since we dont attend therapy or take medication (there is no treatment4DID, only the symptoms of comorbid disorders).

DID used2b called MPD (Multiple Personality Disorder); that's outdated, since DID isnt a personality disorder. &we dont care4the term alters, since we see ourselves as people (some systems say parts, &that's fine&good4them; however we prefer folks or Legion.

Hikarumichi is leader of sanctuary hope system, &Osanu is leader of Legion. if we sign a name at the bottom of the post, it indicates who wrote the post. if someone wants2call attention2a specific person in this head, simply write the name of that person. otherwise, whoever fronts next will try2answer any questions yu might have, or continue whatever convo was already started, etc.

sometimes, we get passionate about things, or carried away with emotion. we'r trying2do better, since this has cost us 2friendships with fellow DID/DDNOS systems.

- Legion

191 replies. On page 9 of 10 pages. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Jazmee27

anyone got their flu shot yet?

TA week ago today (holy crap, was it only last week?), we had a doctor appointment via video visit (anyone ever did that? An interesting experience to be sure). Well, she asked us if we were getting a flu shot (yeah, make us come into the offidce for one thing or another... that's my sarcastic aside. She couldnt get us to agree to a cholesterol test right now, cos we dont want to do anything like that until things settle down with Covid---apparently, tests like that need to be done every few years). We told her we were looking into options (they usually give them here... it's just that we dont know when we give them, and we often forget to call cos we miss when that time rolls around again). Anyhow, we tried calling last week, only to get that stupyd message about "the person you're calling is unavailable." Finally got through this afternoon, and theyr being given on Monday, November 2... So I said we want to sign up, and she asked if 1:10 is OK. I said it was, and requested someone come up to get us that day and bring us down (even before the pandemic, we hated going down in the elevator by ourselves... tended to get turned around due to the dissociation, and we havent been out of the apartment without somebody with us since February--we were out last week to go riding in the wheelchair oon the Rail uTrail. Obviously, we werent alone then).

- Osanu

Reply #161. Oct 05 20, 1:31 PM

terraorca

I have not yet gotten a flu shot.
I got my shingles shot the last time I was at my Dr.s office.

Reply #162. Oct 06 20, 4:55 PM

Jazmee27

Bad news

We learned today that someone in the same building where we live tested positive for Covid.
It's a "high risk" or "vulnerable" population here.

terraorca, glad you got your shingles shot.
We have never been asked about that one.
Guess we are too young or something (same with the pneumonia one... which we did at least hear we were too young for).

Reply #163. Oct 08 20, 9:54 PM

Jazmee27

We got an orientation of sorts this afternoon...

M gave us two surgical masks (one is for us to wear when people come to the apartment, and we have a backup for when we need another one) and a face shield. She made sure we can use them, and even explained some things. The "paper mask" is more comfortable than the cloth one, and makes us feel safer due to that wire at the nose. A bit uncomfortable at first, but nothing major.

Update: the note on our door telling about the neighbor was dated AOctober 4.

Reply #164. Oct 09 20, 3:11 PM

Jazmee27

Someone wrote poetry. Not sure who wrote those poems (will post at later date, along with some other things).

We have this birdcage thing in the bedroom (not to be confused with painted birdhouse that is smaller and cannot fit anything in it--the birdcage on our bookshelf is bigger and is more like a birdcage... We keep small items in there, like our cloth masks, and we put the spare paper one in there too). We found two clean cloth masks in there, too, so took one out in case we wanna use that for whatever reason rather than the face shield (tied around the pillow on the back of our chair) and the other mask.

Reply #165. Oct 09 20, 9:09 PM

MiraJane

A shingles vaccine is reccomended for people 50 years old and over. I've never heard of an age limit for the pneumonia vaccine. I got mine when I was 28.

Reply #166. Oct 10 20, 12:06 AM

Jazmee27

Wow, MiraJane. Guessing we don't know why we've been told that then. Ah well...

News of the day was, there was an announcement this afternoon inviting people to a spaghetti dinner... we were napping and thought, sarcasticly:

Let's all have a Covid party!
Also, let's go make friends with Corona and play nice, since apparently one shouldn't be afrqaid of the virus (according to Trump).

On another note...

We are named Xanthi. It's a girl's name of Greek origin (and a place in Greece). We use they pronouns, though. Also, we look like an 11-year-old or 10-year-old girl, even look like one, however we are an elven hybrid.

Zarvon is elvish himself... and we have another member of the Enclave named Landon.

We were surprised to learn Xanthi's a "legitimate" name. After all, we can no longer go on sites with the names we want to look at (old technology, old browser, that sort of thing).

We love singing. Go around singing through the body, notes with no words (like humming, except we aren't humming).

~ Xanthi

Reply #167. Oct 10 20, 6:55 PM

Jazmee27

Someone just wrote this:
=========================================================
Rain
Cleansing the air
Making all things fresh
Pouring down in buckets.

We sit inside
Waiting
For the storm
Named Delta (Tropical Rainstorm Delta).

Reply #168. Oct 11 20, 5:27 PM

Jazmee27

BTW, we end up with some titles that overlap those we will post are fr others (we write it as reading list). Just want make clear if we later post, for example, a poem called loneliness, it wasn't plagiarized... someone here really did write that (today in fact, we just wont be posting it today; we are gonna post the list, though).

~Xanthi

Reply #169. Oct 11 20, 5:36 PM

Jazmee27

We got new reading material last week (National Geographic, Science News and other magazines). Among the magazines were 'Short Stories' (adult content) and 'Stone Soup' (children's writing and artwork) containing the following titles:

POETRY COLLECTION - The Golden Elephant by Analise Bradock (contains the following poem titles):
1. Saturn's grand leave;
2. We shall play;
3. The world is waiting;
4. The baby and the rocking chair;
5. The imagination;
6. Water;
7. The love drawing;
8. Earrings;
9. The battle underground;
10. Days;
11. The heart of the earth;
12. Never;
13. Fight the fear;
14. Stand up and notice;
15. Notice the greatness;
16. The juggle man;
17. The wild circus;
18. The golden elephant;
19. Mr Merrywether;
20. Low and high;
21. In a party;
22. The code;
23. The mansion;
24. The truth;
25. Rubber elastic;
26. Belly of the beast;
27. Gimme a call;
28. Fire park water park amusement park;
29. Can't;
30. Unearthly hum;
31. The salty orb.

POETRY COLLECTION - Searching for Bows and Arrows by Tatiana Rebecca Shrayer (contains the following titles):
Poems about Cape Cod
I. riding to the cape on a friday evening
II. shell words at forest beach
III. searching for bow and arrows
IV. the fishing boat
V. first tornado
hope
loneliness
the jewish graveyard
the waking of the spring
memories caught in seaweed
somber key
the ghost of fyodor dostoyevsky
my sicilian trumpet teacher
the old tennis racquets on the wall
when life goes downhill
walks to the three waters
my grandfather's russian typewriter
Three poems about Chile
I. santiago
II. last night of the world
III. vienna del mar
snow in the distance
the gift of a book
the empty cop
trust
train tracks at sobior
the cast iron staircase
the fog's mysterious clearing
the double-headed man
moping along muddy river
the graduates

Contained by Lambert Nagle
the dark instruments by Laura Pockock
going home by William Trevor
white noise by Emma Cline
skin by Joe Mazelis

Reply #170. Oct 11 20, 5:47 PM

Jazmee27

We ordered groceries. Little ones are excited cause we're getting more treats than we normally do. Yesterday when we ordered the deli kitchen stuff she (Sherie, or however it's spelled, the lady who usually takes our orders told us she (the one who makes the deserts) made raspberry tapioca this week and we like that so we getting 4. We also getting 4 cheese delights (they have 3 flavors--cherry, peach and blueberry--of which we like the last two, so we getting 2 of each). And then since this is "apple season," we have a craving for apples and so we getting 2 of her apple crisp (we told she makes a very good apple crisp... and we think maybe she put some in our chicken dinner the one time). Then we ordered the usual chicken dinners, sausage gravy over home fries, chicken a la king, chicken and gravy over noodles, chicken salad and shepherd's pie. Tolday we ordered the grocery portion, and included a lot of candy (M&Ms, kit kats, Hershey's milk chocolate--and the bars with almonds if they have them, peanut butter cups, and a chocolate bar with raisins). Also getting rice krispy treats, those vanilla wqafers with filling, animal crackers, BBQ pringles--we prefer the spicy ones, graham crackers and wheat thins. Then we getting some healthier stuff like salad greens (we putting the chicken salad on that in lieu of bread--and that reminds me we also ordered 2 turkey subs with no tomato and no onion), bananas and grapes (when they ask if we want red or green we always say it doesn't matter--just has to be seedless. We getting yogurts, iced tea, tea cooler, vitamin water (3 orange, 3 blueberry and 3 strawberry banana... contingent on availability, of course). Ordered toilet paper (not running out, but that's one thing we never wanna find ourselves low on. It's ironic that when the lockdown hit we already had plenty of toilet -paper cause we stock up on it--not as in going wild, we just order a pack every time we order). When ordering soda we ask about sales... and so we wind up buying a lot of pepsi (we like coke also but that's more expensive if on sale or they have the 12-packs and we really don't want those). ~ Zarvon

Reply #171. Oct 20 20, 11:00 AM

Jazmee27

Flu shots r on Monday

Covid tests are offered Tuesday

OK we want flu shot... well, no we don't, but that one is necessary

Covid test don't seem practical consideration for us

&we read article yesterday about pandemic&how folks b afraid people start think physical isolation OK&that we can live like that (hey... we actually do, &we prefer it; we r thriving now)

That said, got a hairccut courtesy of Minnie Mouse (hey, it's what she dressed up as for Halloween)

Reply #172. Oct 31 20, 4:25 PM

Jazmee27

Holy crap where did the time go?

Reply #173. Nov 28 20, 8:10 AM

Jazmee27

What the French toast? The last time we were in here was November? Week of Thanksgiving? What the holy turd is wrong with this picture?

Except for changes happening in the head at a rapid fire ppace. If anyone is familiar with energy ascension, then perhaps you can grasp a tiny bit of it. It's a difficult subject to discuss.

"The veil between worlds is opening." No, this isnt science fiction. Sounds like it, or fantasy (not that one either).

Innerworld is changing and happens to be bigger than we realized. We stumbled onto this place we call "the in between place" coz it's between the collective and the void. The folks who live in that place dont identify with being part of a collective. And the only one weve "met" at all calls himself Cervanasentro (which loosely translates as dark one in this made-up language body developed when she was younger. He is full of hate (at one point my mind brushed his and I was instantly repelled due to the slimy texture of his mind... and afterwards I felt super dirty as if his lower frequency energy totally swamped my own and corrupted it. I dont know what to do other than hope that something will change and start a shift in energy for him). He calls himself head programmer (and he attempts to mobilize the legions... essentially hes responsible for destabilizing the collective. We have a "cleaner" that propels folks into the void if theyre found to hinder our forward momentum... but hes threatened to drag one or more of us with him if he gets even an inkling of it. And besides hes one of the old ones... which means as twisted/jaded/dark as hes become he *does* velong here... and the challenge is finding some way to help him--rather than alienate him further).

Many of us have past lives that just happen to be intertwined (Im proly talking to myself again... ah well).

Cant write anything tomorrow cos we gonna watch the following moviess (if anyone does read this, tell me what we watched... cos wer just writing a line from the dialogue ijn the movie or, in one case, the line from a song in said movie).

*all holiday films*

1. "Keep the change, you filthy animal."
2. "Merry Christmas, you filthy animal... and a happy New Year."
3. "I want that hat, and I want it now."
4. "There's always tomorrow for dreams to come true..."

Yesterday, all the residents here got a pointseta, day planner, chocolate, crackers, 2 pens, an ornament and some other print thing (might also be a clip in there). All of thats on our kitchen table.

Wer not seeing bodys mother today or tomorrow; first off, she had company come from Ohio (her friend Ruth; both had "a visit from Mr Covid, so no reason for concern there). Tomorrow, theyre having a small gathering (for which they couldnt even cook for cos when they came home from the store they discovered they had no electric). Ruth and Min will come the day after Christmas, which enables us to watch movies all day (we can even watch Santa Claus 1-3 if we want).

Weather: Rainy, windy... and a chance of meatballs (I couldnt resist).

Merry Christmas, everyone.

- HM

Reply #174. Dec 24 20, 4:47 PM

Jazmee27

This one goes out to all those who are struggling over the holidays on account of lost friendship (like us):

"When you're a good person, you don't lose people - they lose you." (quote heard on an FB page)

I can't speak for anyone else, but I feel a bit better now.

Reply #175. Dec 25 20, 9:28 AM

Jazmee27

I'm reading a science magazine... and a tragic case just came up... of a teenager who had a tonsillectomy and didn't survive the proceedure. But because her parents objected to the doctors' conclusions and challenged the decision, she was flown to another state and kept on a ventilator for 4 years until her liver failed. How's that for stellar pareniting? *Shudder* Quality of life sounds nil to me... I know there's a lot of controversy with stuff like that, but still... That's just terrible. Society's come a long way... and then we have this. SMH.

Just entertaining myself while I wait for a phone call (I had been watching a movie on TV, but it couldn't hold my interest--I doubt it was the movie itself... just one of those days). Just relaxing with Buddy Bird :-)

Reply #176. Dec 26 20, 8:55 AM

Duchess716

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. And the movies we watched yesterday: The Muppet's Christmas, Mickey's Christmas Carol, and one by Dreamworks with the Madagascar characters.

When we got back home, we watched the first part of Angels in America.

Reply #177. Dec 26 20, 10:12 AM

Jazmee27

Same to you, Duchess716. Those movies sound great.

We were gonna watch Chicken Little today, but we couldnt get into it. Tonight wer watching Pocahontas, though (pretty sure we lost interest in Chicken Little coz we were anticipating Ruth and body's mother.

Reply #178. Dec 26 20, 12:48 PM

Jazmee27

Not OK not OK not OK

I feel like throwin the biggest temper tantrum in the history of temper tantrums

...

Ruth was gonna come over with Turdapple but cos they got 10 inches of snow where she lives in Ohio shes gotta go home cos her adopted kids cant get to the house and shes got cats that need carin for

I feel like tellin Turdapple that she can stuff the food she has for us cos we dont wanna see just her

I got to talk to Ruth (which is how come I know how much snow they got and that) and she said shes gonna come again in a few months and visit

We were real quiet and Turdapple told us to quit giving Ruth the cold shoulder and thing is we were just tryin to compose ourselves cos when wer disappointed we cry...

And it takes a while sometimes for us to cry but once we do its hard to stop

And we were tryin to avoid lettin Turdapple know we were cryin cos shes as emotionally supportive as a bulldozzer

And shel tell us to stop cryim and get our sh*t together

Its cos she knew we were cryin she called us a filthy animal (Home Alone reference)

She said shel call back to tell us when shes comin... n the temptation to tell her to stay away is very strong

Not gonna give into it cos then wel have several sh*tstorms to deal with and not just one

I was able to explain to Ruth I couldnt think what to say (but I did wish her a happy new year then)

- HM

Reply #179. Dec 26 20, 12:52 PM

Jazmee27

She is poopy - Osanu

Hikarumichi: *Sigh* Good news is, Turdapple's gone (and wont bother us the rest of the weekend... though wel still talk on the phone). Someone had an accident (BM) on our desk chair... and she made us clean it (yep, not being able to see it doesnt change matters--we "have the tools" to avoid that sorrt of incident and so shes not gonna clean it up... such is our punishment). She gave us a ;pair of gloves, gave us a rag, and sprayed a bleach-based cleaner (we were wearing a mask cos the clothing she got us for gifts hadnt been washed yet--we got a sweatshirt with snowflakes and penguins on, a fluffy pair of slipper socks, and a pack of socks... we told her the other day some of our socks were too small so we needed new ones, and she just happened to be running last-minute errands. We also got, from her, 2 different kinds of hand sanigizer--the little purse sized ones--one is winter snow or whatever it's called and the other is peach, a hand soap--the snow one--and bath and body works lotion--forget what she said that fragrance is, but it might be the same. She also brought turkey and ham dinners, pumpkin roll, cinnamon rolls Ruth made, apple pie Rob and Lisa made/brought, two cheesecakes--one chocolate and one cherry--and some containers of cranberry stuff.
Unfortunate part is, Osanu switched with me (I think cos hes the one who farted and made the mess. We tried to clean it right away, but were unsuccessful. What I hate, though, is when she says stuff like, "It looks like sh*t. Could that be what it is?" Uh... you expect me to admit to that especially when it wasnt me, and I wasnt even aware of it until now?
We turned the heat on before she got here cos they want a low of 19... with the real feel in the negative digits. Last night was the same temp bu a real feel of 8 (heat was on by afternoon also).
Tobi Parakeet got to come out, too :-) he was calmer than the last time he was out--sitting still longer--and gave us kisses. Just adorable :-)
She did take the clothes she bought us home to be washed (she just wanted to show us first; she didnt wrap anything cos she didnt see a point in doing so... seeing as everything had to be "quarantined," wiped down, if not washed).

Reply #180. Dec 26 20, 4:54 PM

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