Death Is No Laughing Matter Trivia Quiz

Answer: Oscar Wilde

Generally regarded as the foremost playwright in Victoria's reign, Oscar Wilde was barely 46 when he died of meningitis in Paris, destitute, but with a friend, Robbie Ross and a Catholic priest who gave him a 'conditional baptism' in attendance. There was no doubt of his literary genius, but his sexual orientation led to a criminal conviction in those Puritan times, and he endured two years of hard labour, during which time his health deteriorated, contributing to his final illness and death in a dingy Parisian hotel room. The wallpaper quote stems from that place. He received a posthumous pardon in 2017, 117 years after his death.

Wilde left the world a legacy of witty plays, profound verse, many clever one-liners, and one novel, 'The Picture of Dorian Gray'. One oft-quoted saying is, "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars."

Answer: Johnny Carson

Johnny Carson, comedian, TV host and writer, was the much-loved host of 'the Tonight Show' for 30 years, and earned the accolade of King of Late-Night Television. He kept audiences in stitches with his many alter egos, such as Carnac the Magnificent, a psychic, Art Fern, the 'Tea Time Movie' announcer and Aunt Blabby. Along the way he introduced his audiences to many talented people and helped launch their careers in entertainment. Incidentally, being a spoilsport, I have to tell you that hair and fingernails do not continue to grow after death; it may look like they do because of dehydration causing the skin to shrink back from where they emerge.

Answer: Voltaire

Voltaire, born Francois-Marie Arouet, wrote in many genres including plays, verse and novels, on many subjects. He was an advocate of free speech and of separating the Church and the State. His alleged deathbed statement was in response to a priest exhorting him to repent his sins and to renounce Satan.

Answer: Bob Monkhouse

English stand-up comedian, author and host of several television game shows including Celebrity Squares and Family Fortunes, Bob Monkhouse also appeared in the first of the Carry On movies. He completed his National Service with the RAF in 1948, and won a contract with the BBC after his Group captain unwittingly signed a letter stating that he (Bob) was a war hero and deserved an audition.
The quote in question has also been attributed to the late great Goon, Spike Milligan.

Answer: George Axelrod

George Axelrod (1922-2003) was involved in the entertainment industry all his life, starting out in summer stock theatre before serving in the Signal Corps during WWII. Postwar, he wrote scripts for many radio and TV programs. He became a writer for comedians, and his stage comedy 'The Seven Year Itch' was a great success when rewritten for the movies, starring Tom Ewell and Marilyn Monroe.

Answer: Spike Milligan

Spike Milligan was Irish-English, born and raised in British Raj India. He served in the British Army as a gunner in North Africa and Italy during WWII, using his spare time to help entertain the troops. He was a jazz musician, playing drums, guitar double bass and trumpet, and was a passably good crooner. He teamed up with Peter Sellers, Harry Secombe and Michael Bentine, and in 1951 the Goon Show was launched on BBC radio. It became a favourite programme with listeners and ran for many seasons with a cult following.

As with many comedians, Milligan suffered from depression and had a number of nervous breakdowns. He was still able to joke about these awful experiences, and claimed to be one of the few people in the world with a certificate proclaiming that he was sane. Despite being born in the British Empire to an English mother, and having served in the wartime army for 6 years, he was not granted British citizenship, so in 1962 he became an Irish citizen. When the Chichester diocese refused to allow his chosen epitaph, the family compromised by having it carved in Gaelic.

Answer: Woody Allen

Born Allan Stewart Konigsberg, Woody Allen is a comedian, actor, writer and most particularly a filmmaker. His screenwriting has earned him (as at 2026) a record number of 3 wins and 16 nominations for the Best Original Screenplay Academy Award. Perhaps he earned the most accolades for his 1977 movie 'Annie Hall'. Perhaps because of his somewhat controversial private life, Allen's career has fluctuated, with him being periodically in/out of favour with the critics. He is a jazz clarinetist who played regular gigs until 2020 (his 85th year).

Answer: Demetri Martin

Born in New York City, Demetri Martin grew up and started his stand-up career on the East Coast. He won the Perrier Award at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe in 2003 with a show titled 'If I....', which the BBC turned into a TV special. He has written for many comedy programs and has a different style of presentation from most comedians.

He plays instruments, particularly the guitar, on-stage and has background music playing during his performances.

Answer: Winston Churchill

Born to wealthy parents, Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill joined the British Army in 1895, seeing action in India, Sudan and the Second Boer War. His political career commenced with the Conservative Party, with an early detour to the Liberal Party, where he held many influential offices before rejoining the Conservatives. Before WWII, Churchill was prominent in warning of the rising threat of Germany under Hitler.

He openly opposed Chamberlain's appeasement policy, and became Prime Minister in May 1940.

He became the face of Britain, rallying the troops and civilians through the tragedy and privations of war. He was always controversial, but his wit was undeniable. One of his one-liners: "Tact is the ability to tell someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip".

Answer: St. Lawrence

Lawrence, from Spain, was brought to Rome and ordained as a priest by the future Pope Sixtus II. He became Archdeacon of Rome, in charge of the Church's material wealth. On hearing that the Roman Emperor, Valerian, had issued an edict that all ordained members of the Church were to be executed and all its wealth was to be taken by the Emperor, Lawrence set about distributing it among the poor of Rome. When confronted by the prefect, he presented the poor, saying that these were the wealth of Rome.

The story goes that the prefect was so enraged that instead of having Lawrence decapitated, as were most martyrs of the day, he ordered a roasting grid be set up and Lawrence cast upon it to die a slow, agonising death.

This legend has become part of the story of the early Christian church, but doubt has been cast upon it. A theory is that an error in transcription resulted in 'passus est', simply indicating martyrdom, becoming the words 'assus est', which means 'he was roasted'. Other early church records record 'passus est' regarding Lawrence. But why let the truth get in the way of a good story, especially when it indicates a cheerful attitude to the Grim Reaper?