Stop! Who Goes There? Trivia Quiz

Answer: Klinger

Corporal (later Sergeant) Maxwell Klinger was often seen on sentry duty (usually wearing one of his finest dresses), so is the logical match for this quote. He actually usually said "Halt!" rather than "Stop!" or even just "Who goes there?", but hey, the quiz title fit nicely with the same effect. Klinger, played by Jamie Farr, spent the entire series trying to work his way out of the army - the cross-dressing was a valiant, but ultimately unsuccessful, attempt to achieve this.

After he was promoted to the position of company clerk following Radar's discharge, he took his job much more seriously, and wore his uniform more often. Ironically, at the end of the series he opted to stay in Korea to help his Korean fiancée Soon Lee search for her family.

Answer: Radar

Corporal Walter 'Radar' O'Reilly got his nickname because of his uncanny ability to hear the helicopters bearing incoming wounded soldiers before anyone else. In his role as company clerk, he always seemed to know what his commanding officer needed - appearing with the relevant papers before the request was complete, having the telephone connection set up before it was asked for, and so on.

In the movie that preceded the series, Radar didn't have any first name; Gary Burghoff, who played the character in both cases, chose Walter. In the movie, he was a savvy, conniving character, but for the series the character was modified to be a shy and unassuming farm boy - hence the quote selected to represent him. In the final episode, the teddy bear he had left behind when he was discharged (in Season 8), as a sign that he was growing up, and no longer needed his sleep companion, was one of the items placed into the unit's time capsule.

Answer: Henry Blake

Lieutenant Colonel Henry Blake was the commanding officer of the 4077th MASH for the first three seasons. His laid-back managerial style sat well with many of the men (especially Hawkeye and Trapper John), but aroused scorn in the more militarily assiduous members (notably Frank Burns and Margaret Houlihan). The quote used here was made to Radar, his company clerk, who always anticipated his needs and words, often finishing the sentences that Henry started. Radar's response to this question ("One of us has to") reflected his awareness that his commanding officer had a tendency to avoid making unpleasant decisions.

When McLean Stevenson decided to leave the show, his character was written out as being discharged. A final scene was added to the script that the actors worked with, ensuring that they would have a genuine surprise when they heard the news that the plane carrying him home had been shot down, with no survivors.

Answer: Colonel Potter

When Henry Blake departed, he was replaced as CO of the 4077th MASH by Colonel Sherman Potter, a longtime soldier whose service started in the calvary during World War I, and whose love for horses has continued. When Radar rescued an injured horse and is desperate to keep it from being put down, he gave the horse as an anniversary gift to Colonel Potter, who was regularly seen riding Sophie for the rest of the show. This exclamation is one of several minced oaths he used to express frustration.

While Col. Potter was an efficient military administrator, he also showed a good understanding of the pressures under which his doctors and nurses worked. He tolerated their hijinks (within limits), and took pride in their skill - aside from Frank, whose posturing he clearly disliked. While he started off objecting to Klinger's attempt to get a Section 8 discharge by cross-dressing, he grew to accept it as a vagary from a soldier who actually did his work well, and was able to joke about it after Klinger, as company clerk, started wearing dresses less often. By the final episode, the chronically anti-military Hawkeye showed the depth of his respect for Potter by saluting him - something he had steadfastly refused to do on many earlier occasions.

Answer: Hawkeye

Captain Benjamin Franklin Pierce, universally known as Hawkeye, was played by Alan Alda. A superb doctor, he was promoted to the position of Chief Surgeon of the 4077th MASH despite his frequent statements of disdain for military protocols and standards. In fact, the quote I decided not to use, "Life, Liberty, and Pursuit of happy hour", is readily associated with his character's apparently self-indulgent style. But, as seen in many episodes, he did have strong feelings about ethics and morality - although not through the same lens as used by Frank Burns! His wit was a prominent feature of the show's dialogue, but most often his line would only make sense with the preceding dialogue provided or the situation described.

The quotation used here is the start of a conversation with Father Mulcahy in the Season 5 episode 'The General's Practitioner'. Here is the full interchange as listed on imdb:
Hawkeye: "War isn't Hell. War is war, and Hell is Hell. And of the two, war is a lot worse."
Father Mulcahy: "How do you figure, Hawkeye?"
Hawkeye: "Easy, Father. Tell me, who goes to Hell?"
Father Mulcahy: "Sinners, I believe."
Hawkeye: "Exactly. There are no innocent bystanders in Hell. War is chock full of them - little kids, cripples, old ladies. In fact, except for some of the brass, almost everybody involved is an innocent bystander."

Answer: Frank Burns

Major Frank Burns, played by Larry Linville, was an incompetent surgeon who acted as the major antagonist to Hawkeye and friends for the first five seasons of 'MASH'. In fact, the only person in the unit who seemed to have any time for Frank was Margaret 'Hot Lips' Houlihan, with whom he had a long-running romantic relationship - which broke down when his wife found out and threatened to divorce him (and shut off the purse strings); his derogatory description of Major Houlihan in his desperate attempt to keep hold of his wife marked the end of the affair. This also marked the start of Frank's increasingly erratic behaviour that led to his transfer back to the US (and promotion, go figure).

The nickname Ferret Face reflects the contempt that most of the 4077th felt for Frank. It was not just that he was an incompetent surgeon, which was certainly the case; he was greedy, racist, nakedly ambitious, and childish in his emotional responses to others.

Answer: Margaret Houlihan

Loretta Swit portrayed Major Margaret "Hot Lips" Houlihan, Chief Nurse for the 4077th MASH. Initially, she teamed with Frank Burns as upholders of proper military procedures, protesting the lack of protocol and decorum in most of the doctors. Following his departure, the character became more likeable, and less of a caricature. Even when she objected to the general behaviour of Hawkeye and his friends, she acknowledged and respected their superior performance in the operating theatre - even saying (in the episode 'The Colonel's Horse') that she wanted Hawkeye, not Frank, to operate on her if necessary.

Answer: Charles Winchester

Major Charles Emerson Winchester III (played by David Ogden Stiers) was the tentmate in The Swamp who replaced Frank Burns, to provide a verbal antagonist to Hawkeye and BJ. Unlike Frank, he was a highly skilled surgeon, but his pompous and pretentious manner laid him open to ridicule. He was not, however, one to take this lying down, and used his intelligence effectively to engage in return witticisms. He also retaliated to practical jokes with moves of his own.

This quotation was made in the episode 'Fade Out, Fade In' which marked his first arrival at the 4077th, sent there by a general who wanted him out of the way out of spite for a loss in a game of cribbage. Charles was expecting to return to a cushy staff position at any moment, but came to realise that he was in fact stuck in the field. This tirade, delivered to Colonel Potter, read in its entirety (according to imdb), "But know this. You can cut me off from the civilized world. You can incarcerate me with two moronic cellmates. You can torture me with your thrice-daily swill, but you cannot break the spirit of a Winchester. My voice shall be heard from this wilderness, and I shall be delivered from this fetid and festering sewer." After he stormed out, Colonel Potter noted to Radar, "I think he's starting to get the hang of this place."

Answer: Father Mulcahy

A Jesuit priest, Father Mulcahy (William Christopher) tends his flock with sympathy for their foibles, acknowledging that most of them do not share his faith, but do rely on him to provide a moral compass and a sympathetic ear when necessary. As the series went on, he seemed to be aware of his anomalous position as a man of peace in wartime, volunteering for dangerous missions and desperately seeking promotion - which did arrive in the episode 'Captains Outrageous'.

Father Mulcahy was anything but a 'pious priest'. His boxing prowess was displayed several times, as was his luck in betting pools (the proceeds going to a Korean orphanage); he was not, however, a terribly good poker player but that didn't keep him out of the game.

Answer: PA system announcer

You may not consider the PA announcer as a character in the show, but their cynical edge helps to set the scene in many episodes. The PA announcements were delivered by a number of different actors, most notably Todd Sussman, along with Sal Viscuso and Jimmy Lydon - although some of the main characters' voices were also heard at times. The quote in the question was delivered by Todd Sussman in the Season 2 episode 'For the Good of the Outfit' and again in the Season 3 episode 'Adam's Ribs'.

Other PA zingers delivered by Todd Sussman:
"Attention, all personnel - we interrupt your sweet dreams to bring you the following nightmare."
"Attention all personnel. Tonight's movie is a holdover from last week and will be shown right after supper, which is also a holdover from last week."
"Attention. Here's a bulletin from the truce talks at Panmunjom: after six weeks of negotiation, the U.N. and North Korea have agreed that flagpoles in the peace compound are to be thirty-two feet, six and one-quarter inches high. World leaders hail this agreement as an important step toward lasting peace."