A Grab Bag of Whatnots and Things Quiz

Answer: Dentist

Cotton candy made its public debut at the 1904 World's Fair in St. Louis, which was officially called the Louisiana Purchase Exposition, no doubt to mock the French. Visitors watched in eager anticipation as sugar was melted down into liquid sugary gunk, spun through tiny holes, and gathered into fluffy, airy clouds that in this author's opinion, are a complete and total abomination to humanity. Morrison and Wharton sold the treat under the name 'Fairy Floss', because even they knew it wasn't meant for human consumption. They reportedly moved more than 60,000 boxes at 25 cents each, a total that approaches half a million US dollars today. That's a lot of flossed fairies.

And yes, surprise! Morrison was a dentist. A dentist inventing a machine that transforms pure sugar into edible insulation is the ultimate prank on our teeth. In fairness, sugar was not exactly public enemy number one back in the good old days of 1904 when pooping meant taking a walk to the backyard. Morrison joined up with confectioner John C. Wharton to refine the electric spinning machine, improving on earlier hand-cranked attempts that were sticky, slow, and just kind of tragic and sad.

Answer: Julius Caesar

July was not always 'July'. In the old Roman calendar July was called 'Quintilis'. This just means the fifth month. It made perfect sense for the Romans who had at some point decided the year began in March. After the assassination of Julius Caesar in 44 BC, the Roman Senate decided that Quintilis needed a new look, and I think we can all agree that this was wise in retrospect. Since Caesar had in fact been born in that month and had recently overhauled the calendar itself with the Julian reform, it was just good marketing to rename the month in his honor.

So, it stuck. Not many actual people can list a whole month on their résumé, but Caesar managed it. The month of July still carries his name across dozens of languages. Meanwhile, Augustus Caesar would later get August, because Dad shouldn't get ALL the glory. Then came Caligula, whose reign ended that streak for... let's just say personal reasons.

Answer: Bockscar

Three days after Hiroshima, another B-29 Superfortress took off from Tinian Island carrying a plutonium bomb codenamed 'Fat Man'. That aircraft was named 'Bockscar' (sometimes "Bock's Car"), after its usual aircraft commander, Captain Frederick C. Bock. On 9 August 1945, with Major Charles W. Sweeney at the controls, Bockscar took off headed for Kokura, Japan. The mission was plagued with mechanical issues, fuel anxiety, and heavy cloud cover over the primary target. Lucky for Kokura. Quite unfortunate for Nagasaki, the backup target that became the second recipient of that unwelcome gift from the American military.

Unlike the Enola Gay, which gets all the headlines, Bockscar's story is a mess of complications. A faulty fuel transfer pump limited the plane's range. The crew made multiple bombing runs through smoke and haze before finally releasing 'Fat Man'. They then sputtered toward Okinawa on fumes, supposedly landing with almost no usable fuel left. Less than a week later, Japan surrendered.

Answer: Ephebiphobia

Ephebiphobia is the term for an irrational fear of adolescents or youth. The word comes from the Greek 'ephebos', meaning 'lazy punk'... or 'youth/young man' depending on the translation dictionary you're using. Pair that with 'phobia' which means... well, phobia, and you've got yourself an irrational fear of those with a cursive writing deficit.

Joking aside, it is not really about being mildly annoyed by eye-rolling or slang that makes no sense. The term is generally used to describe a deeper anxiety, prejudice, or severe distrust toward teenagers as a group. So less "Can you turn that garbage down" and more full-blown panic attacks in the presence of (or even the thought of) hoodie-wearing humans.

The word gained more attention in sociological discussions during the end of the twentieth century. This is when scholars began examining how societies often portray teenagers as dangerous, lazy, and/or morally suspect. And in fairness, the media has a habit of treating each new generation like a swarm of locusts.

I remember when I was a kid, everybody was worried about me turning into a Satanist because I got into Dungeons and Dragons for a year. Now people on Twitter (or X if you must) call me a Satanist because I believe the earth is a globe. Regardless, it's the same today as back then. Most teenagers are just going through acne flare-ups, braces, algebra homework, and the usual existential dread. Results may vary.

Answer: Jimmy Carter

Before ever giving a big silly grin in the Oval Office, Jimmy Carter was a naval officer and a trained engineer. After graduating from the US Naval Academy in 1946, he served in the submarine force and was later personally selected by Admiral Hyman G. Rickover, the demanding father of the nuclear Navy, to join the Naval Nuclear Propulsion Program. That meant intense training in nuclear physics and reactor technology at a time when nuclear submarines were just on the edge separating science fiction from reality.

Carter even did work in the Navy's early nuclear program before his father's death brought him back to Georgia to run the family peanut farm, which is how most people remember him. Well, if you don't count the presidency. The experience shaped Carter's lifelong interest in nuclear policy and nonproliferation. It also makes for a REALLY wild resume: peanut farmer, nuclear engineer, president.

Answer: The Battle of Balaclava

The Charge of the Light Brigade occurred during the Battle of Balaclava on 25 October 1854. A vague order. A valley lined with Russian artillery. About 670 British cavalrymen who did exactly what they were told to. The result was a headlong charge straight into a storm of cannon fire.

It was the perfect textbook example of how not to phrase battlefield instructions, but at least generals learned that telling the cavalry to head for "the guns" on an active battlefield is not a sufficiently specific instruction.

The episode became legend with all due thanks to Alfred, Lord Tennyson, whose poem 'The Charge of the Light Brigade' mythologized the disaster with lines about 'the valley of Death' and stoic obedience and other assorted whatnots. The Crimean War itself was a messy, mid-nineteenth century clash involving Britain, France, the Ottoman Empire, and Russia. Balaclava was just one battle in a larger campaign, but it was that doomed cavalry charge that we remember best.

Answer: Acts

'Matthew', 'Mark', 'Luke', 'John'... and 'Acts' make five. Officially titled 'Acts of the Apostles', it's the much-ballyhooed sequel to the four Gospels, telling the story of the early Christian church after the resurrection of Jesus. It features Peter and Paul, prison breaks, shipwrecks, speeches, riots, and quite a lot of mileage.

Traditionally attributed to Luke, it bridges the story between the life of Jesus and the early missionary work that leads into the epistles.

Answer: The independent evolution of similar traits in unrelated species

Convergent evolution is basically evolution's version of "Great minds think alike." It involves unrelated species independently evolving similar traits because they're adapting to similar environments or ecological niches - if you want to sound all snooty.

The classic example is wings. Birds, bats, and insects all fly (with apologies to penguins), but they did not inherit wings from a common ancestor. They each engineered their own aerodynamic solutions along different lines. Totally different blueprints. Same blue sky. Ain't life grand?

You can see it all over the tree of life. Sharks and dolphins look suspiciously alike in body shape, yet the shark is a fish and the dolphin is a proud mammal. Cacti in the Americas and certain euphorbias (a kind of spurge) in Africa both evolved thick, water-filled stems and spines to survive their desert life, despite being only distant cousins as far as biology is concerned.

Answer: Lady Gaga

Before the meat dress - as if anything mattered in life BEFORE the meat dress -before the infamous disco stick, before the Oscar and the Super Bowl halftime spectacle, there was just Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta. We all know her as Lady Gaga, although some of us know her considerably less well than others.

She was born in New York City in 1986. She studied at the Tisch School of the Arts, and then she dove headfirst into the downtown music scene for better or worse. The stage name allegedly came from the Queen song 'Radio Ga Ga'.

Answer: McGillicuddy

Lucy Ricardo, queen of funny faces, weird sounds, bad luck, and worse ideas, was born Lucy McGillicuddy... at least according to the show's script. The name pops up here and there throughout 'I Love Lucy', usually when her mother, Mrs. McGillicuddy, visits and brings a little homespun normalcy to Lucy's Manhattan mischief.

'I Love Lucy' starred Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz and debuted in 1951. It quickly became a television monster, pioneering the three-camera filming technique and the live studio audience format that countless sitcoms later copied.